Is it better to make a formal complaint re birth and aftercare before or after birth debrief?

[Neuehausfrau]

I want to make a formal complaint regarding the management of my induction and post natal care of me and ds but am unsure if it will be more effective before or after attending a birth debrief at the hospital, does anybody have any advice or experience please?

Effective for you, or effective for them? I would probably wait until after the debrief, as it may explain some things you are concerned about and you may no longer wish to complain about some of them.

Or it may shed light on other things you are not happy with, which you may want to add to your complaint.

FWIW I had a debrief with an independent MW after an awful birth and found it really helpful, I felt much better because she was truly independent from the hospital MWs so I didn't feel fobbed off at all. Many independent MWs will offer this for around £50.

Yes I agree, wait until after the de brief, you just never know what they may say to you there. I'm sorry you've had a bad time of it and hopefully this meeting will help you.
I had similar after a difficult birth with dc3. I was actually quite surprised that some of what was written in the notes was incorrect. Like midwife wrote she checked heart rate 5 mins before waters broke, just before I started pushing. the truth was we hadn't seen her since she showed us into this little side room.

I suppose I'm saying you might be interested to see how it gets represented before you complain. It may give you more ammunition.

After. Take notes during the meeting. Can you take someone else as an extra note taker, so you can just concentrate on the discussion? And you might find it helpful to have a copy of your notes, although there will probably be a charge for this. PALS can help you with this, so no need to mention it at your debrief. Good luck. Sorry you're in this situation - I made a formal complaint and it's stressful.

If I was you I would write your formal complaint now while it's fresh in your mind, but edit and send it after the debrief.

I do hope you and your baby are OK. I felt rather down after my induction and EMCS experience. My mum pointed out that I had made a good recovery and my baby was perfect - that simple fact really helped me.

Thank you all. Yes i think it makes sense to have the debrief first but get the compaint ready.

I have a copy of my notes which is about an inch thick. One of my complaints is that I was left for 6 hours with no pain relief after a kelliands delivery and the epidural had worn off, I was crying in agony and despite my dh and mum asking at least three times for pain relief the three midwives chatting behind the desk ignored us. One midwife told me i was very lucky I didnt end up with a cs in that I should be greatful for what I got. None of my requests for pain relief are written in my notes, there is a big gap.

The Pead said my ds should have regular obs since he had a temperature and I had contracted an infection yet he wasn't checked over after birth for 12 hours, i feel so guilty about that but I wasn't in any state to realise until later.

I have been really depressed but starting to feel better now 7 months on, partly because I have finally healed physically. I am hoping that making a complaint and debrief will give me closure so I can move on and stop obsessing about what happened.

Those who have had debriefs did it help you to move on?

I'm sorry you had a shitty time. Glad you are both well though! I had a horrible labour & delivery,ended up crash section which could have been avoided but anyway...

I had a debrief with my consultant after pushing fir 6 months - apparently no-one had ever wanted to discuss their l & b before at my hospital... My consultant was on maternity leave during my pregnancy so I had never met her until the debrief meeting - I actually think that's a bit odd now - why wasn't I given a named stand-in?).

The long & the short of it is that yes I felt SO much better after discussing it with her. She didn't go so far as to apologise but did tell me that she could imagine what my midwife had been like with me & knew the doctor I was talking about when I said I'd told her the mw was being really mean to me but she just looked at me bewildered & I never saw her again. The consultant told me my situation would never have arisen had the staff who were on duty when I arrived at 6.30am,looked at my notes & made a start rather than leaving me bouncing on a ball in the tv room until new staff took over at 8am. Also that thestaff I saw that day were pretty junior & not equipped to deal with my situation.

It was all explained to me,I felt vastly better that next time I will be in much better hands & not subjected to all the failings I had first time round. It really really affected me & it's not always so simple as being grateful that you & your baby are here safely. I often had flashbacks to the terror of thinking he was dead & I was on my way out too. Those stopped after discussing it all with consultant.

I'm pretty sure you'll feel much better afterwards neue. I certainly hope it clears your head as it did mine,although I had fewer worries about our after"care" at the time as I'd never been in hospital before etc. Now I know it was pretty lax but at least it wasn't neglectful as yours sounds.