Pain relief at 2cm. What happens if you just NEED it?

[StarlightMcKenzie]

I gave birth in an amazing unit last birth and my birth plan was agreed to say:

No internals. I'm in active labour when I say I am and require any pain relief/birth pool I say I do. Gas and air to be offered on arrival.

I've moved area since and can't get to amazing birth unit so am opting for a homebirth.

How can I ensure a similar arrangement? I know of many places that refuse pain relief if you refuse internals but an internal result has feck all to do with pain levels so it seems barbaric.

Any chance you could ask for another midwife. This kind of attitude and "care" is Shit

She was the homebirth team leader!

I guess maybe
People who become midwives are more likely to be attached to the idea of intervention free birth since that is whe midwives have value.......once it becomes medicalised the midwife is less needed in a way.
I really support women being able to choose the birth that they want and the truth is a lot of us want pain relief.....
My ob admitted that when her time comes to have kids she will go straight for a c section.....she was not as frank as that when I was asking whether to go for a c section or a vbac, but pointed out the reason so many urologists and obs who are female choose ecs is because they deal with the damage when things go wrong...and it is much harder on a woman than recovering from a c section.

I guess we all have to weigh up the risks and probabilities of possible outcomes.
Personally I had a great experience of a c section, the pain of healing was far more manageable than the pain of labour and many hours of pushing.Many friends have done natural birth....they loved their experience too.....but women should not be denied pain relief if they desire it.
Why do people love dominating others with how they think it should be?

not wanting to derail thread, but Starlight, I've just been and had a look at that thread with the midwives discussing MN (and this the internet eats itself...) -

My stomach churned when I was reading it. As someone with a history of sexual abuse, depression and sexual violence who had a DC via elective CS because of primary tokophobia - yes, that 'primary tokophobia' that one MW poster chose to put in inverted commas, fgs -

THANK GOD no one like those MWs had anything to do with my care and birth. Especially that one bemoaning the consultant who had recently OK'd a few caesarians for women because of primary tokophobia. THANK GOD the community MW I saw, and the consultant MW, and the perinatal psychiatrist, all had the humanity to listen to me and see their job as being to care for me and my baby, rather than ignore me or dismiss me because of their own personal and professional agenda.

Whether it's CS or homebirth, I loathe this idea that women JUST AREN'T LISTENED TO, and are only given approval of some kind if they happen to tick the right ideological boxes for that particular MW. I'm sure some MW on that board would love to dismiss me as a Daily Mail reading (wtf?) deluded doctor loving bitch. What they don't realise is how terrified I would be if I'd met one of them when I was pregnant, and realised how coercive they were.

thread hijack over. Starlight I really really hope you are allowed to plan in the way you want for the birth you hope for, and you get a mw who can care for you adequately.

Fruity, I agree completely and don't think its a hijack. If you are denied pain relief because you refuse internals than that its coercive and barbaric. Its immoral when you might have good reason to refuse, or even if you don't have good reason. If you don't comply you don't get the reward. I do not see any justification for this what so ever. Its disgusting. Its a human rights issue. Starlight you are absolutely right when you say that student midwives should take note.

And you wonder why people want to go private? Or have ELCS?

How hard is it to listen to a patient rather just treat them as a lump of flesh that you just happen to be dealing with on that day.

Fruity,
I found this statement particularly vile:
"I don't think all the highly medicalised birth's on TV help either - parents now see it as their 'right' to demand a pain free birth, epidural or C/S."

Duh! It IS THEIR RIGHT, their HUMAN RIGHT even.

Actually Raluca, more to the point I'd like to know reasoning behind why it shouldn't be a right.

If there are ways to avoid pain or a traumatic experience which may have long term implications for your physical and mental health which NICE support and recognise with their guidelines (and also say that don't have a financial justification for denying), then where do people get off in suggesting that women are somehow being precious and demanding in the way they are treated?

I'm really suprised how different midwifery can be just area to area. I wouldnt routinely examine a woman upon arrival if she was regularly contracting, and if she needed entenox, no problem. It isn't going to do any harm. We can do examinations later, if and when needed.

If a woman came in and asked for other types of pain relief, then yes I'd prefer to discuss examinations, but only because I wouldn't want to give pethidine for example at fully dilated!

I really do wonder how much this is all down to mw training/actual reasoning and how much is down to hospital policy/funding that has made it 'normal' and 'accepted' to refuse pain relief and not listen to the woman? I hope we are not too far away from a radical change in the handling of birthing women. One day we will look back and wonder why we put up with this. Oh and how on earth we ever thought it ok.

I read that student midwife thread and felt like smashing my head through the computer to be honest.

Maybe I'm a bit biased after having a truly horrendous birth with my dd (could write 6 pages about it) but I don't think any medical professional has the right to comment about what is an acceptable level of pain for another human being to be in, regardless of whether that pain is birth induced. You wouldn't have someone admitted with a broken ankle and suggest that they try and cope without pain relief as long as they can - they'd be pumping you full of all sorts of pain killers.

Why, in 2012, is it STILL acceptable to try and fob women off when they want pain relief during child birth? I can only put it down to budgets, and power trips.

Makes me so angry.

This is one of the reasons I have fought to get an elective c section this time with ds due in 2 weeks. I had my consultant say to me "why don't you talk to the anaesthetist about having an early epidural instead?" - Are you INSANE?? Last time I was in labour I had to wait 6 hours to get my epidural after being told by a midwife that I was "overreacting" and that I "had a long way to go yet" - thanks for that... So how are they going to somehow guarantee me an epidural the minute I get there in labour regardless of whatever else is going on in the ward?? Does he not think I'm intelligent to know he's trying to fob me off... He can go fuck himself.

Yes I'm angry. I think the midwifery in the UK leaves a lot to be desired. I'm not saying ALL midwives before I get leapt on... Infact thanks to a good midwife this time round I'm getting my c section at all (she wrote to the consultant on my behalf suggesting he agrees to it) but so many are just locked into their own little "natural is best" worlds....

Sigh.

I actually believe that a calm natural birth us conducive to needing very little pain relief.

I also believe that a clam true natural birth is a rarety in this country and that often pain relief is needed BECAUSE the woman is not listened to and respected, a a way of dealing with the power imbalance, the uncertainty and the interference.

However, need still means need!

I had such a positive birth experience with DD1 (including a early epidural) that I avtually refused to move until after DD2 was born so that I could have her there!

Move house, that is. I didn't just camp out there for the next 2 years!!