3rd degree tear advice

[PiggyMad]

My first baby was born on Monday and I ended up with a third degree tear - don't think I have piles though. Not checked my notes and hazy on the details given. I'm just wondering if it's normal to feel so exhausted and sore and be walking like I'm 80?! I'm also struggling with any sort of sensation down there and can't hold in wind - urine is ok though. I had the first post-natal bowel movement this evening and while not painful, I couldn't have stopped it once I felt it coming. Really hoping it isn't permanent.
Feel like maybe I'm not coping well and should be doing more but dh is running around doing everything and I really don't feel up to visitors.

please rest. fgs don't exert yourself, you are recovering from an injury, it's the same as if you tore a muscle in your back (since your core muscles/perineum etc. are part of what you use to prop yourself up, walk, all sorts really)

you poor thing, i'm sure someone more informed will be along shortly but i just wanted to be the first to say, take it easy! your body's just done something extraordinary, you need to rest and recover x let others care for you, don't feel guilty

Thank you! I just feel like a bit of a wimp for hobbling around and wasn't sure if it is normal to be so wiped out physically. The lack of sleep definitely makes things worse!

Hi I had a 3rd degree tear with DD1. I was on lactulose for a week or so after and my bowel movements were similar to yours. It wasn't permanent though! For a little while after, I couldn't hold on for very long if I needed to go for a poo, but it soon went back to normal.

I can remember going for a walk once I was home from hospital, and feeling like my insides were going to fall out. I mentioned it to the midwife on her visit, and she said "Of course, you would feel like that -take it easy!"

I was shocked at how incapacitated I was after ds was born. I thought a ten minute stroll to the chemist about day 5 would do me good but ended up sitting in the chair they reserve for old people as soon as I got there. I was afraid to pass any sort of bowl movement for days too. So while I sympathise with your pain it does all sound completely normal! I wouldn't worry about doing much either, you are supposed to rest and snuggle your baby while letting everyone look after you Not only did I feel physically wrecked I was all over the place emotionally with hormones so could barely manage to look after me and ds let alone do anything else. It does get better though but give yourself a couple of weeks to heal and of course congratulations

Bowel not bowl, though I'd have been bloody frightened to pass a bowl too

I had my first baby on Monday too & ended up with a forceps delivery & episiotomy & have been feeling exactly the same. I'm still in shock by the whole thing & really not up for visitors either.

I don't have much sensation & was in tears today over my first poo! Quite the ordeal which I blame partly on the hormones.

I'm not really sure what's going on down in terms of wind & definitely couldn't hold anything in. I can't feel my bladder either until it's full & then it's a mad panic to get there.

My whole body hurts & I feel like I've done 10 rounds with Mike Tyson. I'm also walking round like an old lady & puffy as anything. I wonder how long this lasts for

DS is lovely though

Thanks for reassurance mazzi and purple. Good to know I hopefully am feeling within a range of 'normal'.
Stripey sending huge congratulations and sympathies - it sounds like you have really been through the mill. My birth was a normal vaginal delivery but baby had hand over her face so tore me as it all happened quite quickly. Fingers crossed we both start to heal quickly.

I have millions a few DCs - my advice
lactulose as a matter of course - its only sugared water, by DC I just took it
tea tree oil soaked sanitary towels, I presoaked each one of a pack with a few drops of tea tree oil
Also a sports water bottle next to tap, when you go to wee, put a few drops of tea tree, fill with warm water and aim!! then just pat gently dry but not bone dry

and lastly

GET THEE TO BED and rest, I believe firmly in old fashioned baby mooning for a while, have time to recover.

Thanks piggy & congrats to you too.

Yes fingers crossed for a quick recovery. Can't wait to feel back to my old self. Bed rest sounds like the best way to get there! Will have to keep visitors to a minimum.

I had a third degree tear and didn't leave the house for week bar being driven home from hospital. When I did I couldn't walk far and had to take it pretty slow. I normally speed walk and DH kept racing ahead with the pram as he couldn't get used to me being so slow!

Take it easy and let yourself heal. I also took lactolose for at least a week and can remember the wind but it stopped quite quickly.

Congratulations!

Hi piggy

I had a third degree tear from DD with her hand on her face last year. All now completely fine and expecting dc2 but the first few weeks were hard. I found sitting with a small cushion under each bum cheek helped, as did daily baths with lavender oil.

I also saw the specialist ladies Physio who helped me with exercises and stuff. I didn't have much sensation which she said was due to tissue and nerves tearing. It all came back though.

Make sure you look after yourself.

Yes, completely normal from a third degree tear, they're very painful. I remember the wind and pooing was quite an ordeal- had to go as soon as I felt it but took a while. Were you given the advice about putting your legs on a stool when you poo to put yourself in a squatting position, that helps a lot. And sitting on a towel rolled up either side for your legs to rest on takes pressure off your scar. I was very strongly told NOT to use one of those rubber ring things a lot of people use as apparently that can put more pressure on the area.

I was very strict with myself about doing pelvic floor exercises to try and make sure I regained control. At first I could barely feel the squeeze but it got better quite quickly and at 36 weeks on pregnancy no 2 I haven't experienced any wee leaking like a lot of people report, even when I had an awful cough I kept control. I always did them when sat down Breastfeeding as it's not like you can do much else!

I'll echo the advice about warm water and tea tree over your bits during and after a wee, I sometimes added a bit of lavender and salt too. Dab gently dry and try to air your bits when you can (lie on one of those maternity mats to protect the bed). And take it easy and listen to your body, a long walk hurts for a reason!

The midwives were all impressed at how well my stitches healed up and I think the air and tea tree helped. I did get a lot of swelling as I can't take anti-inflammatories which pulled on the stitches a bit but I had no issues with infections or the wound opening up.

It will get better but if there are any problems don't suffer in silence and make sure you get it checked ASAP.

Don't make the mistake I did of comparing yourself to people who have had a straightforward birth or 2+ babies and doing too much. You need to rest and above all keep your stitches clean.

Not being able to control wind is normal at this point. 4 out of my 7 strong NCT group had the same thing. Gentle pelvic floor exercises will correct this. Took a few weeks for me to have it mostly under control and a few more for complete control.

Hi Piggy (and others) I am a bit ahead of you in that my DS2 is 2 week's old and I had a ventouse delivery and third degree tear after cord complications. You must rest and not feel guilty!

I had the same 'urgency' issues at first which I found very distressing and got myself into a real state thinking they were permanent but found that once I stopped taking the lactulose, things improved and sensation is definitely returning. Several MWs have reassured me that it is normal at this stage. I take a short bath twice a day with lavender oil to keep everything clean and have been fortunate that it's not too painful.

Second the advice to do your pelvic floor exercises as much as possible - I do them when BFing too. Even in ten days I can feel them getting a bit stronger.

Most of all, take it easy and give yourself time to recover. As my DP said when I was in floods of tears, "If you'd badly hurt a muscle in your arm, you wouldn't be expecting to be great at tennis a week later."

Thanks so much for all of your messages and reassurance. I'm feeling a lot better today and less emotional! Have also managed (tmi) two poos since labour and I survived !

Congratulations PiggyMad It sounds like we had a similar birth experience with my DD's hand being up by her head and her head being on the 91st percentile But I'm glad to report that now she's 2 weeks old, things are much better and the healing is going very well. I've not used anything other than a bit of sea salt in my daily bath and airing my stitches as much as possible. I would also echo the others in saying get as much rest as possible (not easy with a newborn!) I'm sure you'll feel loads better in a matter of days Congrats again!

Aah davina congratulations on your daughter - these naughty girls causing lots of trouble!
Will make sure to try to air the area to help healing.