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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

Everytime I Watch OBEM I Shout, 'GET UP'!

44 replies

Treadmillmom · 01/03/2012 18:27

Oh, it so winds me up, slow labours, forceps, episiotomy...why the hell do I never hear a single MW say;
change position
get on all fours
stand up
go for a walk
Grr. I watched it last night and that 25 year old with the dyed red hair who ended up with an episiotomy and threatened forceps I just didn't understand why no one suggested she shift!

OP posts:

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scarlettsmummy2 · 01/03/2012 18:31

Totally agree! The midwives also seem very keen for the mums to have epidurals. It is very different to my experiences at birthing centres.

rubyslippers · 01/03/2012 18:36

There has been some great water births and active births on the programme too

It is also edited I am assuming and labours last hours not the few mins we see

I ended up birthing DS laying down on my back ut throughout the labour had been very active and walking/squatting

Gingersnap88 · 01/03/2012 18:56

I thought last nights one was a shame, particularly as the woman with red hair was leaning against the bed when she first arrived, and it was her partner who suggested she get on the bed and rest.
I know it's edited but I am always surprised by how many of the labours end up with the woman lying on the bed, it seems they get on to be examined and then don't move..

FutureNannyOgg · 01/03/2012 21:35

I do too. I shouted a lot last night.

MrsRV · 01/03/2012 21:43

I don't understand the insistence on forceps... My midwife said where I live that forceps are very rarely used and she said usually a c-sect is an alternative but none of the poor women in IBEM seem to be given a choice and are basically TOLD what is going to happen!! Every water birth seems to go well, every epidural seems to end with assistance!

Pomtastic · 01/03/2012 21:49

HEAR HEAR!!

It winds me up so much I don't watch it.

Also have issues over the slight bullying/lack of consent from the medical staff (might just be the few episodes I've watched though hopefully - I'm thinking mainly of the woman a few years ago who refused the syntometrine partly due to fear of needles, when they held her down & they injected it anyway )

marshmallowpies · 01/03/2012 21:52

I'm not watching OBEM at the moment as it clashes with pregnancy yoga...decided that was a better use of my time, to focus on something that relaxes me rather than stresses me out...but yes, I am becoming increasingly worried about the thought of being pushed down an 'intervention' route and the extent to which women end up on their backs no matter how active they have been earlier in labour.

But we have no way of knowing how a heavily edited & selective TV show reflects real life. I'm really hoping it doesn't...

Rollerbaby · 01/03/2012 22:11

Completely agree. I actually think it's irresponsible programming which shows a very negative and medicalised version of birth which would be enough to terrify/wrongly inform any woman preg or not. Shame.

QTPie · 01/03/2012 22:16

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

tonybasil · 01/03/2012 22:16

Glad I'm not the only one getting annoyed with it. I purposely didn't watch it before as I was pregnant with DC3 but I have watched the last 2 and felt sorry for the women on it as they seemed to be steered down the epidural route which then leads to episiotomies and forceps. But yes it is highly edited and maybe there are plenty of other women who are having active labours with no intervention who don't want to be on t.v thank you very much! However I wonder what message it gives to women watching who haven't yet had children?

workshy · 01/03/2012 22:17

I had both my babies in that unit and it's not representative of my experience at all

I was encouraged to walk around, I was given a birthing ball, it was suggested that I get into different positions and different alternatives for pain relief were offered

I did have epidural with DD 1 as it was a slow labour and I was exhausted

DD2 I had standing up

it's edited to make good tv but I can see how people would think it can make birth seem very scary

gemma4d · 01/03/2012 22:17

Hmmm... DD2 I had lying on my back. Would have made a short episode though, was only there a few minutes. Think the only reason she didn't come sooner was that I was very-determinedly sitting on the car seat/wheelchair. So I think you could have something, but you can't tell the whole story from highly edited TV. (sits on fence).

FutureNannyOgg · 01/03/2012 22:35

I don't think I have ever seen ventouse used on there either, just a lot of forceps, and often high keilland's forceps.

I was also very cross when the lady having twins a couple of weeks back suggested she would like to birth on all 4s, which was brushed aside by the registrar, then she ended up in stirrups with them manually positioning twin 2. Grrraaaarrrh.

crazynannimama · 01/03/2012 22:45

Thank god I wasnt the only one shouting at the telly! Had my daughter watching it too who has recently decided she wants to be a midwife or a doula, so I was making a point of stressing better alternatives than lying on a bed, pushing against gravity, just because thats what suits the misogynists doctors

Onebirthplaneveryminute · 02/03/2012 07:35

I spoke to one of these midwitves... Know h er in rl... She said they ate not showing many of the active births. One birth filmed was a spontaneous vaginal twin delivery which wad active... Not being shown. She also said that several of these women have had very, very long laboues, have been up and down the corridors, on balls etc.. Not being shown. Producers this time want human drama, not focusing on technicalities, don't think they tealisr how much women want a true vs reality tv picture of birth.

Onebirthplaneveryminute · 02/03/2012 07:36

Forgive typos! Phone....

LovesBeingWearingSkinnyJeans · 02/03/2012 07:44

I agree tgat tge births are being picked for tv entrainment rather than education/true reflection. During tge last series I ended up having to defend tge mw to mum as she said that the midwifed spent all their time drinking tea in the office . It's so much time condensed tgat the good work it originally appeared to be able to do, will not be fulfilled. But I guess that's my hopes for tge programme rather than the programme makers.

The problem is it creates more of tge same as women watch and think that's what you are meant to do!

MorrisZapp · 02/03/2012 08:00

I've only given birth once, but my experience was that once things kicked off, my body took over and it was no longer a case of choosing ways of giving birth.

I was lying down for the whole process, because that's what my body did. The midwives encouraged me to shift about but they had to physically turn me over etc as I was away in lala land.

I have many friends who planned an 'active' labour and then found they didn't want to get off their back, and indeed couldn't get off their back.

Really, so what? Isn't this just one more pressure on women to perform? I pushed my baby out fine whilst lying down. If anybody had told me to squat or go on all fours or whatever I would have ignored them.

Thank god for intervention I say. I had an episiotomy but I didn't feel it. Why the endless focus on ideal labour and birth? Anybody who wants an ideal labour has forgotten the purpose of the whole mission.

TheCinnamonGiraffe · 02/03/2012 08:13

Perhaps they should show the 'boring' births (not boring obviously, just not what the producer wants in the program) on a separate one off...

I don't think they realiser how much women want a true vs reality tv picture of birth I wonder if they do know Onebirthplaneveryminute but they don't actually care because they think/know the ordinary stuff won't get the ratings?

I'm beginning to wonder who their target ordinance is though because whenever there is a pregnant woman around everyone says 'ooooh, you're not watching OBEM are you? Don't, don't it will scare the life out of you!'.

capecath · 02/03/2012 08:16

Like MorrisZapp I ended up on my back because that was where I ended up and felt like I was stuck there! So much pain and in another world. Everyone was encouraging me to move but felt like I couldn't so was almost on my side when baby came out. I did move around for quite a lot of the process before the last stages though.

capecath · 02/03/2012 08:17

I neglected to say I had a lot of bleeding so would have made a big mess if I'd moved around too much anyway

herethereandeverywhere · 02/03/2012 08:46

I know I could not have been "active" if I'd tried during my labour (although I was getting 7 in 10 as the induction drugs hyperstimulated me). I felt like I was being horrifically beaten up from the inside, my legs actually gave way if I even tried to stand. They moved me to a different room to get me an epidural and I needed DH plus midwife to support me to get up the corridor and I vomited and collapsed once I got there.

Bouncing on balls, swaying and rocking, climbing stairs all seems like fantasy to me. To me it would have been like telling a car crash victim to get up and have a walk to make her feel better. Not saying all labours on OBEM were like mine but the assumption that moving simply hasn't occurred to them or been tried is a little unfair.

shagmundfreud · 02/03/2012 14:21

"I have many friends who planned an 'active' labour and then found they didn't want to get off their back, and indeed couldn't get off their back."

Odd that you almost never see this at a homebirth.

Or in a MLU where women are labouring on mats or in pools.

ReallyTired · 02/03/2012 16:45

I think people fail to understand what active birth is. Active birth is not dancing or doing aerobics. Its changing your position in the same way you would do if you were awake. There may be periods where the woman is lying down, standing, walking about in early labour.

I think that in the past women were far more active in the early stages of labour than they are now. Ie. in call the midwife where one woman is drying kippers and then goes into labour. Or women are actively looking after their 12 other kids or scrubbing floors or hanging out the washing during the first stage of labour. I think that women in the past had an active first stage without knowing it.

Lying on your arse on a bed for hours on end is not natural. I also think women lying on beds attached to monitors feel more pain as they are bored out of their skulls with nothing else to think about. Labour is called labour because its hard work. Sitting about painting your nails and putting on make up is not going to get a baby out.

Onebirthplaneveryminute · 02/03/2012 20:12

To be fair, though, a lot of labour positions are not "natural" either.. I don't ever find myself on all fours with my head down and swaying my arse in the air in everyday life! As for the past/present thing, most of my friends who have had second births have been at home and just getting on with daily stuff for the vast majority of labour, getting to hospital for the last few hours. Two have not made it to hospital as it's been very fast, another two got in with less than an hour to go. Very few of my friends have had labours longer than 4 hours on their second baby unless they have been induced etc. The majority of first-timers I know were induced. Babies are bigger now too, on average and women are induced for a lot of different reasons that they would not have been in the past.

Also, don't most women even with epidural move off their back? When I had it I was on my side, sitting up on the edge of the bed, on my back for VEs only and at the end, on all fours resting my upper half on the back of the bed. They got me to move a lot.

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