Just dawned on me - this baby has to come out!

[Zwitterion]

I'm having a major wobble.

I'm pregnant with DC2 and have obviously been in denial for the last 32 weeks.

On paper, DD's birth was straightforward, 12 hours, used the pool, G&A, no real issues. But I felt (and still feel) shocked and traumatised by the intensity of the pain. It's all come flooding back and frankly I'm bricking it now.

Any advice? Spent last night in floods of tears, poor DH.

Ah zwitterion I would say what you are feeling is pretty normal.

First baby it's all fear of the unknown. 2nd baby you've got a good idea of what's going to happen

I still had the panicky feeling with dc4. I have tried to focus on thinking what an amazing feat my body can accomplish, grow an actual baby (I still get shivers if I think of it, it's mind-blowing!) and then give birth too.

Remember that you've already done it once so you should feel more confident of knowing what is happening to your body.

I have always felt quite primal during birth and tried to think of the pain as telling my body what it needs to do. It sounds a bit woo ( and I feel a nob typing it ) but embrace the pain. Mooing has helped me through all of my labours.

Did you stay mobile during your last labour? Its always helped me.

( think I should add that despite my fears at the thought of it, I do actually enjoy labour and am a little that you will be doing it soon and getting a brand new baby too)

Good luck with it all

I bought a hypnobirthing book and it has relaxed me quite a bit as I too was worried about birth no 2. Looks like I will be having a section now but even that I am quite chilled about.
Worth a try?

My mum always said that nature designs it so that by the time you need to give birth you're so uncomfortable and fed up of being pregnant you're ready for it! Have to say it didn't work for me as my first came early but I'm beginning to feel this way about DD2 and I'm only 32 weeks, so far!

Have you considered using more/different pain relief? I know people have reasons for trying to do without - but if severe pain and the lasting memory of it is causing you such distress, you could at least explore other options.

Yes, I remember feeling like this and trying to explain to somebody in RL and she just said, "It's a bit late now!" which I found particularly unhelpful.

So. Positive thinking. You will have a baby at the end of it. You have done it before. You can do it again. It will probably be much quicker this time. You really want to meet your lovely baby. Can you remember the joy last time?

I do understand.

Normal. I was the same with dc2. However once it got going I relaxed and thought right, let's get on with it! And it was quicker than DS, I knew what to expect at the transition and felt confident in finding the right position (eg MW suggested I move and I said no).

Hypnobirthing CD and pregnancy Yoga. It put me in the right frame of mind. Also as your body is used to doing this, 2nd labours tend to be smoother and much less traumatic.

My first was 39hrs, epidural etc, etc,
Second had established labour for 1hr45min (but did start erratic contractions 12hrs previously) and second stage lasted 17 minutes. It was beautiful.

Thank you so much for your replies and suggestions. It's good to know others have been through the same thing.

I've made some enquiries about hypnobirthing classes so will see how that goes.

And pain relief - yes I think I need to be more open minded about it this time. Last time I was the third of our NCT group to give birth, the first two did it without any pain relief whatsoever, so I felt an irrational (and completely self inflicted) pressure to follow suit. But this time I hope I am more sensible!

Thanks again.

Pain relief - I had none with ds but with DD I went for gas and air AA knew how I could use it iyswim. So might be worth considering which options you could go for and when.