How realistic is One Born Every Minute?

[citymumtobe]

Currently 30+1 with DC1 and have been avidly watching OBEM, despite telling myself not to. Our NCT teacher said it's probably best not to watch it as it's essentially like other reality television programmes and there's a certain amount of manipulation/editing involved. Interested to hear how realistic people think the show is in general and whether it reflects your experience of childbirth/time in delivery suite - or do you feel like throwing things at the TV?! One thing I noticed for instance is that most of the ladies give birth lying down when one thing that's drummed into you is the importance of gravity to the whole process...

the lying down thing seems at odd with what they tell you, yes

i know only 1 person (in my age group) who has delevered lying down

but some of the births are pretty realsitic to me, yes (i've delivered in water each time and i can relate to all the waterbirths on there)

I worked as a maternity care assistant (basically a midwife's assistant) on a busy delivery unit for 2 years. I would say it's quite realistic actually, to the extent that I didn't used to like watching it as it was like being at work I'm afraid the lying down to give birth is very realistic - apart from waterbirths I rarely saw women giving birth in any other position

I think they dramatise things and pick women who have interesting stories or who they think will have complicated births.

And the editing will make a big difference.

With DS, I was upright through most of labour, but gave birth lying down, as I had a heart monitor strapped to my bump at that point, so wasn't allowed to get up.

i wanted to give birth upright with my 5th. but instictively i lad down to give birth. happens everytime to me.

i think that rather primal, animal noise you hear in the background is what makes me remember the most. Like lowing cattle or an angry bear

btw, during labour i am upright, rocking, birthing ball etc

I had ELCS for DD1. VBAC for DD2 and was laid on my back. I did have an epidural but think I would have been in this position regardless.

I think it's fairly realistic but you do have to take the editing into consideration. I always notice that although in shot one the woman is walking about and unpacking her suitcase or whatever, in shot two she has a cannula in the back of her hand, her nightie on and very often a monitor strapped to her bump.

well, I have had the same thought - I'm 32 weeks ...!

I have friends who are midwives who say it represents a particular type of hospital and not all are like that - depending on where you give birth. if you are in an MLU you will be encouraged to move around more. I think things like standing/ moving around need to come from you being prepared and wanting it.

two things also stand out - firstly, women go in very early in labour and then spend hours and hours in a brightly lit uncomfortable room getting worried abotu why their labour isn't progressing - my MLU advises people to stay at home as long as possible. There was a woman recently on OBEM who was advised to go home, but stayed and looked like she was just in the worst place to be - she ended up in tears saying 'there's something wrong with me' - it seemed to me watching that she would have been much better off at home for a few more hours instead of getting wound up about slow progression, in a cold uncomfortable hospital room.

secondly - the negative attitude of some midwives - my midwife said she couldn't believe hearing one midwife say - to a labouring woman 'listen, it's going to get worse and worse, it's going to be horrendous, labour is awful'

i mean - imagine starting a marathon with your coach on the sideline saying 'this is going to be HORRENDOUS you will be in agony, it will be awful' ....its just not how the human mind reacts well to anything.

and quite clearly lots of midwives simply don't behave like that, or think like that.

If you haven't done hypno birthing I've found it very useful in counteracting a lot of this negativity..!

It is pretty realistic. Most of them are lying down cos realistically that is what ends up happening in most hospitals, not that it is necessarily ideal but that is what happens most of the time

I think it's quite realistic. I have had 3 straightforward labours with no pain relief. I laboured upright and mobile with all three but like misdee wanted to push the babies out while lying down. As it happens my last baby was delivered standing, but only because I couldn't get onto the bed (I did want to).

I am surprised too that more women aren't shown pacing up and down. I wonder if the only have one camera so as not to intrude (and it might be in a fixed position). So the labours they end up with the best footage of are those where the mum chose to labour on their backs.

Just remember it is edited 'highlights' and even then it's births picked out from all the ones that happened.

I think all first time mums (and teenage girls) should watch OBEM.
Very realistic IMO

I think it's the most realistic portrayal of birth I've ever seen on TV.

There was an episode in Series 1, with a lady who had a heart defect. Her pregnancy had been fraught with worry, and by the time labour came, the pain, worry, sickness, and general fed-upness was etched on her face. Shortly after having her baby, the joy, relief and wonder took over. This was exactly my experience, and I thought they captured the reality really well.

I agree with the poster above who talked about the waiting around. I stayed at home until 7cms, in agony with contractions, but managed to sleep between some of them, use my own things and toilet, with DP there getting me what I needed. So by the time I got to hospital, I was actually there and ready to have a baby (she took 11 more hours but that's another story).
And I was lying on the bed too - and you prob will aswell. Forget gravity, think comfort. I was tired and wobbly.

I think it's pretty realistic if you're giving birth in a hospital. I think on OBEM, they try to show a mixture of deliveries: assisted, straight forward vaginal, c sec, water birth,epidural, gas and air, no pain relief, etc etc so in that respect, think it covers most angles. And to be fair, the mw saying about it being awful is giving her opinion. If she said to women, oh no, it doesn't hurt and anyone who says so is a wuss, she'd be shot down in flames. It is called labour for a reason; some people have a great experience, but for most,it is hard work! It is nothing to be frightened of though!

At the end of the day, remember that they are in the hospital 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, and yet, each week we see 2 births. So yes, obviously they choose ones they think will hold the viewers interest, and, run of the mill births, with no 'human interest' story, get editted out.
That said, from my own experience (and I've only had 3 dcs, not the thousands it would take to make proper date ) I think it's pretty realistic.
I had an epidural with the first, but the other 2 shot out in no time, but I lay on my back all 3 times. 'twas the best position for me. Is the thinking about being upright more to do with the labour, rather than the actual birth ? (prepared to be told I'm well out of date)

Yes realistic, except no hour long show can truly give a realisitc impression of the exhaustion and boredom of a long labour.
We see them go in all exited and scared. We sometimes see them swearing at their partner cos that's funny and then we see them being told to push.

Cut out is the intervening 2 to 24+ hours of pain/ pain relief/ examinations/ sleep/ no sleep/ being sick/ trying to walk to the loo/ more examinations/ more pain/ monitoring etc etc).

That bit is too boring for TV.

I think it was pretty realistic although the midwives spent hardly any time in my room until I was pushing, watching that it seems they are with the ladies most of the time.

Surely the lights are on for the cameras??? They are just 'on the wall' cameras, so probably need good light no?

I laid down for all my births (3) I was active in labour but towards the end, when it felt like my bum was exploding, I found lying back and pushing with my legs right up really helped. I tried pushing in every position but this was best for me. I could give it real wely

ethelred, you are right about realism - but you can be realistic and encouraging. ie 'this is going to be hard work and intense but you can do it, we are all here to help' ..I think the words 'horrendous' and 'awful' and going on about pain increasing are not helpful. and I would honestly hope to have a more positive opinion of birth from someone who has chosen to work with birthing women...she is the person there to support them and to make it as good as an experience as is possible...so I think there has to be a balance between preparing people for the hard work ahead, and being positive and encouraging....

Of course it's realistic, it is actually real! The only thing not "realistic" I suppose is the time frame - some of the women will have been in labour for 12 or more hours but obviously it's edited down just to show the important bits. As for how they choose the women, they just send out a load of letters to all the women due to give birth in the hospital and hope that some respond. They don't film everyone who comes in, that is totally not allowed at all. They need to get prior consent before filming.

Waterrat, you are right in that she is probably not going to win any prizes as a motivational speaker! I was admitted early (at 1cm dilated!) as although in theory I wanted to stay at home as long as possible I found the pain hard to deal with from the start, despite having done visualisation through yoga and feeling like I was pretty well prepared for what it had to throw at me! So because they had a bed available, I was like the women on OBEM who are seemingly there for hours/days! I found the early labour ward MWs a bit hit and miss, but those on the actual delivery ward were really encouraging and suggested I stick to my birth plan of labouring in water, even though I was literally crying for an epidural at 6cm. I did end up delivering on my back, because i ended up having to have an assisted delivery, but after almost 24 hours of no sleep and contractions, I was glad of the lie down!

No one mentions the lady who gave birth with the assistance of forceps to the 10lb plus baby girl a few weeks ago, now if that wasn't realistic tv I don't know what is.. I was in floods of tears watching the clearly distressed woman, distressed baby and the anxiety / stress on the faces of the midwives seemed almost too realistic for me! As everyone says though, of course it's edited to 'highlights' and only those with a particular 'angle' are included in the programme..

Yes I sobbed through that episode - no change there then!

and the one with the lady with special needs after being run over as a kid.. amazingly tear jerking too..