Elective caesarean

[MsMoo]

When I started to tell people that I was considering having an elective caesarean I was amazed to find that quite a lot of people thought I was being very selfish. It seems I might have been a bit naive to think people might accept it as my decision. Luckily there is this fab website www.csections.org which talks about all aspects of caesareans in a really informative and balanced way and I pointed people to that. I found that many of the accusations people were throwing at me were either ill informed or downright wrong. Am I on my own or are any of you finding the same thing when telling people?

Hockeymum - Sorry to hear your recovery was so much longer than your friends who had natural births. I honestly found that I recovered quicker than most of the NCT group that had births at the same time as me.

I don't really think that people should be "encouraged" to go one way or another. As long as they have all the facts about both options (and there are really negative things about both routes to childbirth) then they should not be pestered by medical people who are really just pushing their own agenda's rather than supporting the decision of the mother. I doubt many people take the decision to have a caesarean lightly.

Just seen your post MrsBigD, looks like you were in the same situation as me - I agree that odds of 2/3 just aren't worth the trauma of another emergency section!

lahdeeda... they will try and discourage you and try and push you to 'natural'
But if you insist they will give it to you Especially as your lo didn't want to come out the first time

If I had gone for a VBAC the chances of my baby dying would have gone up from roughly 1 in 100,000 to 10 in 100,000. Why would anyone 'encourage' me to do that? Unless they think that live babies are less important than...what exactly? That my birth experience matches their idea of a 'good' birth? How crazy is that?

Ladymuck, that person is mad, thick and rude so their views can easily be dismissed. But I'm still horrified that people can be so mad, thick and rude.

Lahdeedah - according to the website that I found \link{http://www.csections.org a hospital can refuse your request for a caesarean (if they have a hospital policy of no elective caesareans) but if they do refuse they must refer you to a hospital that will agree to carry out the caesarean. The site also indicates that many hospitals do not have this policy and so if you are having difficulties convincing them of your wishes then persevere as you are probably just dealing with personal opinion and if you push you will get your own way.

Also most private healthcare will not cover caesarean procedures. (And in any case some private hospitals do not have the facilities to look after you or your baby if something goes wrong and so you run the risk of being separated from your baby by being moved to other hospitals if one or other of you are unwell after the procedure).

Currently thinking of a vbac. But am seeing the obstetrician for the first time tmorrow, when I hope we can dicuss my notes from last time. Diffwerent hospital, nearly 6 years ago - I can't remember much!
Like many of you what frightens me most is another emergecny, which just seems more likely than I want it to be! So am keeping my mind oopen at the mkment, But they are clearly going to push me towards 'natural' I think.

I simply told my consultant that I would NOT consider a forceps or ventouse birth under any circumstances. She instantly agreed to a caesarian, which says it all, I think.

God one of these days I will manage to post the link correctly - here goes this

You might have to push a bit, but you will get there in the end. You will need to talk to a proper doctor though, not a midwife.

Hi MsMoo,

I used to be a midwife and I loved my job - really enjoyed helping women with homebirths etc and am very vocal about women having the type of birth they want as long as they know all the pros and cons. When I had my son I ended up with an emergency CS. If I ever get fortunate enough to have another baby I'd have no hesitation in requesting a CS again. It was fine and I felt really well afterwards. As long as you know all the pros and cons you are making your decision in an informed way. Don't be put off by other people.

Aloha, if she was mad, thick and rude I wouldn't mind.

She is however totally indoctrinated!

Ah Aloha - we could have been in the same body - exactly what I said to my consultant after 3 days of failed inductions and a baby whose head had not engaged. Like your consultant mine agreed instantly to a CS. I felt that I'd tried the "natural" (or should that be "un-natural approach with induction - and what exactly is "natural" anyway) - it wasn't working so as far as I was concerned my baby was saying - "hey - bring me out another way guys".

More than one way to have a baby and we are so fortunate to live in these times where we have the technology and skills available to ensure our babies are (in most cases) born safely and we are left healthy.

Aloha, re forceps and ventouse, did you reject them because you're more likely to tear? (really intersted as had em cs last time so haven't experiecned these things and need to KNOW!).

Beware indoctrined beliefs. Those who say "you MUST do it this way" and who - if they have to do it another way feel that they've failed some test or other.

Personally I think that given the state of midwifery services in this country it is surprising the CS rate is not higher.

Well, I know both forceps and ventouse have the potential to cause damage to both parties at a birth. They are also a sign that things have gone wrong. I did not want them and I knew I could enjoy a caesarian birth as I had one for ds who was placeta praevia. As it turned out I did go into labour as I had to delay my elective due to having flu, and ended up going into labour a week early. And it was the most horrific, traumatic experience of my life. I really regret that it happened. Very, very upsetting, lonely, frightening, exceptionally painful and just completely degrading and dehumanising. I wasn't even 'allowed' onto the labour ward, so was left alone without even my dh with me and no pain relief at all. If I was prone to PND it could very easily have tipped me over into it. As it was, I had panic attacks afterwards.
I thought the fact that the consultant immediately agreed to a caesarian when I said no to forceps and ventouse showed that she was pretty convinced that they would have been used had I been forced into a vaginal birth.
I do feel a bit sad that dd's birth (with labour) was such a horrible experience compared to ds's (without).
As for recovery, I don't think I recovered any more slowly the vast majority of people who had vaginal births.

and i really don't get the 'selfish' thing at all. What on earth do they mean?

Ms Moo - thanks for the link, that is really useful. I am discovering in matters of health (especially when dealing with NHS staff) that knowledge is power!

Aragon - couldn't agree with you more. It should be all about supporting a woman to give birth whichever way is best for her and her baby. There is very little that is "natural" about induced labour. I found it extremely traumatic dealing with contractions and excruciating lower back pain while being forced to lie back on a bed with a drip in one arm and monitors strapped around my belly. This is what I still lie awake at night thinking about - not the caesarean! No problems with bonding here either - I got hold of my baby as soon as I was wheeled into recovery and she latched on to the boob straight away.

I think I am going to PARP myself here, except to say, when someone else has my body, my baby and my pain, they can decide how I give birth, and not before.
As for the cost argument that usually pops up, a birth with forceps and/or epidural etc can easily cost MORE than an elective caesarian. And a labour followed by an emergency caesarian certainly costs a LOT more.
I wonder if all those who think that women should never be allowed to choose a caesarian on the basis of cost, would also like to ban all epidurals/pain relief?

Aloha - I don't get the "selfish" thing either! The only person who has to deal with the birthing experience for months and years after is the mother herself - so of course she should think of herself first!

Aloha, I'm with you on this one.Totally.Someone I know very well had elective ceasarians for her 2nd and 3rd child - her first born was braindamaged at birth, dur to criminal negligence - she should have had an emergency ceasarian much, much sooner, by the time they got their act together the baby's brain had been deprived of oxygen.
Surely no-one could begrudge this mother her choice of elective ceasarian, or call her selfish.

silly me, but what does 'parp' mean? I'm sure I'll agree!!

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I requested a CS, as I regarded the birthing process as unimportant for me. My priorities were breastfeeding and parenting - I didn't want a nasty labour to cloud that.

As it turned out, the CS was a wonderful experience and the obstetrician agreed afterward that there was no way I could have had a straightforward delivery (DS was oblique and required a ventouse even with a CS).

My parping twopenceworth is that waaaay to much focus is on childbirth in antenatal classes, and too little attention is given to the really big issue of parenting. No wonder so many women have a reactive depression.

Saying that MsMoo, it doesn't matter what choices you make as a mother (CS, conventional,bottle, breast, disposable, cloth, controlled crying or not etc etc) - some smart arse will make a comment and make you feel 2 inches tall!

MsMoo, I think this should be your decision and yours only. I've done it both ways and just wanted to tell you that for me, the c-section first time round (emergency) was very stressful and traumatic. That's not because it was late stage or anything, I just found it all frightening and had some problems with the epidural so I had quite a lot of sensation.
second time I had a v-bac and I was just staggered at how much better I felt and how quickly I bounced back. I felt really awful the first time for weeks and weeks. The painkillers and the iron tablets you have to take afterwards caused the most horrifying constipation, which made me feel so ill and miserable. I hope you don't mind me sharing this with you, but just wanted to tell about my two very different experiences. Hope you have a good birth, whatever you decide to do.

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