Did you turn into a different person during labour?

[HardCheese]

People (actually, my two SILs!) keep telling me that I am going to turn into someone else during labour. If I say I don't want to be naked, they scoff and say, Nonsense, you won't care, and you won't care that you've lost all dignity. If I say I'm pretty sure I want to be left alone to pace around and get on with things (because I know how I generally respond to pain or stress), they say Nonsense, you haven't the faintest idea what it will be like. etc etc.

What I want to ask those of you who have had babies whether you did in fact respond to labour completely differently to the way you expected to? I don't mean was it more or less painful than you expected, but did you surprise yourself by your responses - like if you're normally prudish about flashing flesh, did you stalk naked around the delivery room, or if you are normally a buttoned-up, quiet sort of person, did you scream foul-mouthed abuse at anyone in the vicinity? Did you relate differently to midwives, or your birth partner, than you would have expected in advance, or find certain things much easier or harder than you anticipated?

All thoughts welcome!

haha, this post made me laugh!

the gas and air made me a bit mad. As puddle said, during labour I was focussed and busy concentrating, but whilst they were stitching me up, that's when I became schizophrenic.

I had periods of chattiness and then I remember having an outburst at the poor midwife, shouting 'PEOPLE HAVE HAD OPEN HEART SURGERY THAT TOOK LESS TIME THAN THIS.'

Cringe!!!

I did.

All the things people said about not caring about being naked, or pooing, or weeing in front of people were all true.

I wouldn't dream of taking my clothes off in front of anyone other than DH or DD but I was fucking desperate to get my t-shirt off once I was in labour (couldn't because I had a drip in and couldn't speak through the pain to demand it be cut off NOW!)

Apparently the nakedness thing is to do with the increased oxytocin - Caroline Flint mentioned it in a presentation - being naked increases oxytocin which is what causes contractions, so the primal part of your brain takes over and demands that you get naked if you need to produce more oxytocin. Very clever.

It is very much a primal state for most women (not all, some women seem quite happy to remain in their nightie or get , but actually being left alone to get on with things is part of that - women DO generally labour better when they're not being constantly monitored or checked or examined or timed or talked to (unless there's a genuine medical need to do those things) because it keeps them in a primal state of mind and focused on what is happening with her body, rather than concentrating on what is happening around her.

I was me, but more tired and grumpy. I was a bit less bothered about lack of dignity, but more from the point of view of what was necessary to get by in a difficult situation than suddenly becoming brazen and carefree.

I was very much me, but very calm about everything - especially after they gave me the g+a. Just before that they'd said congratulations, you are definitely in active labour and 5cm already - and I snapped back 'no shit, Sherlock!', which I like to think I wouldn't have done normally. I did make the MW leave the room at one point when I needed to wee on a pad, so clearly still cared about that.

I think I might have done better to block out more of what was going on, ie not having nice chit-chat with MrNC and a MW, but ignoring it, which I'll try to do this time, but wouldn't be surprised if I just get bored again. When people ask about my labour, I tell them 'long and tedious'.

So bit of both, really. Everyone seems to be different so I guess your SILs are just trying to get you to be prepared for anything on the day.

I was definitely snapping at everyone and didn't care what came out of my mind or what I was (not) wearing

I turned from part time lentil weaver intolrant opiate junkie.

Into, not intolerant.

I definitely had no urges to be naked at all. Wouldn't normally and very glad the urge didn't over take me! I really didn't like anyone touching me (normally dont mind touchy feely). I also swore quite badly which is very unlike me.

I definitely remember thinking 'I'll just do this big poo on the floor and then I'll get on and have this baby' Actually I didn't do a poo on the floor but at that point I didn't care about anything other than getting that baby out. I screamed a lot and didn't even take any notice of the disapporval from the midwife: normally I'm quite conscious of what other people think but not then.

I did, however, keep my nightie on at all times, so retained some of my normal inhibitions/traits.

I was calmer, more focused and slightly swearier than usual.

I'm normally very tactile, always wanting hugs etc, but I didn't want anoyone anywhere near me. I didn't want to be touched. I just wanted to be left alone (with the brilliant gas and air) to get on with it. DP is still wowed by how focused I was (he usually sees me as a bit of a wimp who he needs to protect!)

I did however need to be naked. I wouldn't say I'm prudish normally, but I'm definitely a 'hide behind a towel' person on the beach or in a changing room. In labour I consistently refused clothes, no matter how hard the midwife and DP tried to cover me up

Having said that, I certainly don't think I lost any dignity. I had a baby. How blooming brilliant is that!?

No-one knows how you're going to react OP and, honestly, it doesn't matter. Once LO is here you won't give a damn how s/he got here

A bit yes, a bit no!

I was far more compliant than I expected with DD1 - though it was mostly that I had missed two nights' sleep by the time I got to hospital.

I was definitely less inhibited in both labours, although I did put on a bikini top to get in the birth pool, so I wasn't a 'fling my clothes off' type.

I was pretty much me I guess. Thing is, you don't know which bits of your normal personality will come out. E.g. I swear more than I should, but that side of me didn't accentuate at all.

About 5 minutes after I got the gas and air I stripped naked I was just so bloody hot I couldn't bear the clothes being on me. I screamed at the very top of my lungs too, but for the most part I was quite distant from the real world if that makes sense, I sort of took no notice of what was going on around me. I found as soon as someone did talk to me I lost my stride somewhat and became more panicky. It was like the labour took over my brain and I really could have been anywhere in the world. I didn't give a hoot about being naked or pooing all over the floor - those things are so irrelevant when you're in a huge amount of pain and you're trying to get a baby out of you!

The G&A turned me into ms emotional, so i ended up just using tens and was completely still and completely silent, would not speak to anyone would not let anyone touch me. It's not that i Didn't care that my gown wasn't covering my dignity, it just wasn't high on my list of priorities.

Before I had DD I was a total potty mouth. I only swore twice and was very calm.
So not like me at that time!

The opposite to mefifi - I never say the F-word and the only word I could utter whilst pushing was FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUCK!

I just went really into my own little world, did not want to be touched and really did not care that after my water broke it continued to dribble out, everywhere I went, for about 24 hours, but there was no way I was putting knickers on - just felt wrong. I felt the same as CailinDana, if I spoke to anyone I kind of lost my stride - as long as I was quiet and focused and in my own world it was all fine - painful but cope-able.

I was me - nothing changed really. I was comfortable flashing my bits to the midwife, but asked the ambulance crew (I had to transfer from home due to meconium in water) to leave the room while I got dressed (they continued to watch me through the window for no reason).

I was probably about the same as I usually am: not particularly prudish but not foul-mouthed either and still very aware of the world around me. I do remember one moment when I felt I was panicking and losing self-control, but dh says he didn't notice it.

Well, I thought I was a transsexual called 'Davina' and announced it to the room. But I suspect that was just the G&A making my own voice sound very low to me, and I was a bit off my face.

Thanks for all responses, which are very funny as well as informative! Especially briefly becoming a transsexual called Davina, and the generally magical properties of drugs and oxytocin.

I am normally extremely talkative - my partner and I never stop talking to one another, and with other people, especially in medical situations, I tend to use words as a way of taking control of the situation and not just being 'the patient' - so it's interesting to think about trying to be more silent and focused to remain in my primal state...

I'm scared of how i'll be when i'm in pain i don't want to be touched or talked to, when i was 16 i had an operation on both feet and my behaviour after is legendary in my family my gran is still mortified about it (so am i)

examples -
-When asked to use a bed pan told nurse she was a mentalist and i was going to the loo alone if i had to crawl if she tried to stop me i'd sue her for abuse
-when told i could only have tea and toast told her i fucking hate tea and i didn't want the toast cause they only use cheap butter i don't like, then when she brought me a sandwich told her i hate salad and want it plain
-when told i had to keep the drip in told her to get it out NOW or i'd rip it out, i must have looked serious because they took it out.

Am cringing just thinking of it i have never been like that in my life my mum couldn't believe her daughter was acting like a brat and gran didn't speak to me for a week! Terrified i'll be a bratty cow during labour without the teenager excuse! Oh god :(

:o These stories are making me reeeeaaally wish the US had gas and air!

I was actually much stronger and more in control than I normally am. I held it together well.

I was wearing a sports bra so wasn't totally naked, but I certainly didn't care about anyone rummaging around in my ladybusiness like I normally would. :)

You don't have to try to be anything OP. You'll just do what you need to do in the way you need to do it. Don't try to plan it too much. Just take it as it comes. Then come back & update us!

I became a quiet, capable, earth mother in labour. The opposite of my normal personality.

I'd quite looked forward to being badly behaved & shouty but instinct took over and I withdrew into a quiet bubble and just got on with it. I didn't even speak to my dh!