Home birth - should I do it?

[Flowerface]

Sorry, this has probably been done to death on here.

But I am tempted by the idea of a home birth. We live about four minutes drive from the hospital, so could be there in an instant if anything went wrong. It is my second DC. With DD, my contractions weren't strong enough once I was fully dilated and I needed an IV, but my MW seems to think there is no reason for this to happen again. And I suppose we could just go in if it did. But the questions are:

Is there a massive mess? (My DH is VERY worried about this?!)

What did you do about older children? My MW seems to think that they sleep through the whole thing if it's at night, but I am a bit dubious about this... (our house is small). What if it's still going on when they wake up in the am.?

If you had one hospital and one home, did you really find the latter more calm?

I like the idea of having more control over my interactions with the baby after birth, and us getting straight into our own bed. But I am also haunted by a nightmare scenario of DD crying, neighbours calling the police, blood splattering the walls...

HB#4 booked for May here

Go for it!

Used a pool each time, bought from ebay, TENS also bought from ebay,

DS1 slept through his sister arriving and met her at 1am long after MWs had gone home. He didn't sleep through his brother arriving so came and met him when we were still in the pool - one of my all time favourite photos My mum was staying with us so took him back up to bed after a few minutes and he was fine. Amazingly DD who has never been a good sleeper didn't stir!

Reluctant partners arguments
: no hospital parking
: easy access to own kitchen and loo
: not as hot
: less disruptive to family life than admitting/ visiting/discharging
: surprisingly unmessy, midwives are pretty good at tidying up

Ive got my home birth booked!! I am 8 days overdue so hopefully baby will arrive before induction date so i can have DC3 at home, I so hope so! You amazing ladies fill me with such positivity on having a home birth I hope to add an equally positive story! Have been lent a pool which i hope to use, so excited hurry up baby!

good luck preggo

remember you dont HAVE to be induced, and can still opt for a homebirth after 42 weeks.

so long as i had monitoring and all was fine, i was going to be supported in an nhs homebirth after 42 weeks (though i only made it to 40+3)

Yep, I had an NHS HB at 42+3

nannyl i had no idea you could still have a homebirth if you are overdue????? They didnt even ask me about the induction, when i went in at my 40 week appointment she was on the phone to the hospital booking it while the student midwife was poking and prodding. I hadnt even realised til I sat up and she had said induction booked for sat, which is only +12! when i went in on sunday for the sweep i piped up and said that it was only +12 and she said well it could take another 2 days for you to have the baby... Thing is our due date was calculated as the 26th by us, it was only the scan which moved us forward 10 days. So I might not even be overdue! How ridiculous! I hate how intervening it all is!

great site for anyone struggling to get a HB. I actually spoke to the woman who runs it while fighting for my last one, she was wonderful, so calming.

You can have a homebirth whenever you want Preggo. There are times it may be inadvisable (e.g. personally i would not attempt a home breech birth given that NHS midwifes are unlikely to be experienced in vaginal breech- though I would feel different with an experienced independent midwife) and times where it may be madness (e.g. transverse baby). But it is always your choice.

You can also choose not to be induced to a standard timetable and either choose to be monitored, or agree induction at a later date. FWIW, standard induction at my hospital isn't until +15. I agreed to induction at that point (though DD2 came in time not to need it), but could have reassessed if I had wanted. You could, for example, not agree to induction at +12 but agree you will have it at +15 (or whatever).

Good luck!

preggo everything is your choice

the only thing you have to do with regards to giving birth is call a midwife (or go to hospital etc)

Beyond that its all up to you, and should you choose to homebirth quads, than still its your call!

Worth remembering that when you get induced is due to your postcode.... here they wont induce until +14 (unless medical reason)

That said i knew my dates were wrong. By hospital dates my baby was conceived before i ovulated ... I had decided to go until 43 by my dates, and at that point decide wheather to go to 44 weeks (with monitoring)(my choice was to not go beyond 44 weeks)

But its all up to you, and should you wish a 45 week pregnancy its you risk to choose or not choose to take

good luck. My home birth was the best thing ever.

routine induction in my area +14 also...

routine offer of induction, EAP - even if it's not worded quite like that - it's a very kind offer of induction, it's not compulsory. It's your choice to consent to it. Or not.

Your contractions weren't strong enough - how on earth did they measure THAT?! Your level of natural oxytocin is going to be higher at home, so it might even decrease your chances of having that same problem again?

I had a HB with DC2. There was very little mess. I had a waterbirth, so everything was contained in the pool. But I'd got a cuple of shower curtains (cheap, new) to protect furniture and the floor when I got out, and the MWs bring plenty of absorbent pads. Next time I reckon I'll hire a doula and she can do any clean up while me and DH snuggle with the new baby!

My older child slept through it. I'd actually labured gently all day and things didn't pick up until after he was in bed and asleep. It's fairly common for our bodies to do cool tricks like that :) I did have my mum on stand by and if I'd still been labouring at breakfast or if he woke up in the night, mum would have distracted him or taken him off if needed.

My HB was MUCH calmer. We do relax more in our own surroundings!

Good luck whatever you decide :)

I think it was because stage two was taking so long, Madasaspoon. I had been in fully fledged labour for about 30 hours and was EXHAUSTED. So I don't have any complaints about being augmented - I needed the help by then. I am not anti-hospital, and didn't feel badly treated or that the intervention was excessive. But I do wonder whether I would need it if I stayed at home. And I did feel that I didn't have as much control over my interactions with DD after she was born as I might have liked (e.g. I asked that she be delivered straight on to me, but she wasn't, even though she cried immediately and was fine, they took her away and cleaned her up first).

I think I am going to do it, assuming all goes well!

The induction is +14 here too, but I know at least one person who declined.

it has never been worded as an offer though i did also decline!

one of those things that make me [bangry] is the way this is never presented as a choice...

I gave birth in a flat with cream carpets and they remained immaculate.

Although having a toddler soon changed that

Very little mess and it was soooo lovely to be in my own home.