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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

So..... EMCS and needle phobia

6 replies

Kayano · 21/01/2012 23:19

I would like a water birth with GandA but
Obv we can't always control what will happen.

I've been having hypnotherapy etc and am now
Mentally preparing myself for the 'what ifs'

I have managed to have bloods and anti D after much panic/ screaming/ crying and am 36 + 3

I am struggling in all honesty with epidurals and emcs. Can I request a GA so I'm not awake. I am scared if I am awake I will panic, my breathing will be bad and I may distress or harm the baby more...

I would also want DH there however I heard they can only be in theatre
If you are awake, and not if you have GA. is this true? I'm really scared.

I am also scared if I have GA of the effect on my baby and myself. Ie if I am actually asleep I am scared I might not bond well with the baby...

I want to do what's right by her and I'm constantly anxious/ upsetting myself that my stupid phobia will mean I make wrong choices, or I I try to do the right thing I mess it up by having a panic attack or something :(

Terrified

OP posts:
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civilfawlty · 21/01/2012 23:42

I was in EXACTLY the same position. A proper, out-of-hand, panic attack needle phobia. My ds is 8 days old. I had a CS with a GA.

I had to have s CS due to complications but, thankfully, the drama surrounding all needle-encounters inthe run up meant they took the issue seriously. I had long conversations with the anaesthetist who recommended a GA. You have to have a cannula which is pretty terrifying, but I got through with EMLA cream, freezing spray, gas and air and a local anaesthetic before the big needle. My dh was allowed to stay to hold my hand. They do have to leave for the op. But we had both come to terms with this. Of course, it does mean you don't see your baby being born-and I understand that when this is a shock it can bs very difficult, but because we were prepared for it, we were fine. We asked for my don to be handed straight to dh for skin to skin and I will never forget comig round to see them cuddling-it was beautiful.

Things you should know- if your baby is delivered early, they are likely for you to want to take steroids to mature your baby's lungs. These are usually delivered by injection, but can be delivered orally.

After the CS with a GA your baby may be quite drowsy, which can sometimes affect their ability to latch on. In addition, your milk can be slower coming in. In my case, I did skin to skin for hours and let him suckle, but the midwives also fed him a tiny bit of formula. Again, in my case, this has not on to affect well established breastfeeding, though I'm sure some will argue otherwise.

After the CS you are likely to need medicine to avoid blood clots. This is normally delivered by injection, though there is an oral option. However, you cannot breastfeed with the pills. In my case, I have decided to have the injections - I am goof back to the hospital every day for one month so that people I trust, who understand my fear and reaction, can deliver the injection. I been prescribed EMLA cream which I apply everyday before leaving the house to help (and minimise the time I am there). I am having a panic attack everyday beause of this, but this feels like an ok sacrifice to be able to breastfeed. And because I am no longer preg (was so about the effect of the panic on my unborn child).

Finally, I posted a similiar thread to this and got, from some posters (and in real life from people who hadnt seen me freak out) very short shrift from those who implied I should just get on with it. I wanted to say to you that unless people have been there, they just don't get it. Dont let them get to you. But there are ways of minimising he impact of your fear on this amazing experience. I found this birth to be much gentler and more beautiful than a drug free, natural, quick labour when my dd was born and I was in a terrible relationship.

Oh, one other thing: the therapist I have been seeing to try and get through this phobia says that with fears like this, exposure to the object of your fear usually just exacabates the problem rather than dulling one to it. Which is the opposite of what people will assume.

Good luck. Happy to try and answer any other questions.

Kayano · 22/01/2012 00:02

Thank you so much for your reply Smile I was worried about the bonding and breastfeeding etc so that is reassuring.

I know what you mean about people not always 'getting it' if my dad tells me it's nothing but a little prick and I should shut my eyes one more time I will not be accountable for my actions.

I have has sessions with a psychologist before even ttc so I feel like I have come far. I had a wobble with the cann... The thing in your hand Wink but I have been working on that for a couple of weeks with the hospital therapist. The aneisnetist (can't spell sorry) actually does te hypnotherapy on the side so hopefully I would get her.

Part of my phobia is lack of control which I think is Making me worry more should I need emcs. Sad

I just feel like I'm letting her down and she isn't even here yet Sad I do feel anxious and sad in the run up. I got signed off for a week with 'pregnancy anxiety' in the run up to my anti-D injections

breathe DH is really good and I would be scared to go off/ wake up without him Blush

OP posts:
civilfawlty · 22/01/2012 15:15

I guess the point with bonding is that plenty of people with textbook drug free VBAC don't bond straight away. So although it is possible, I think if you can prepare yourself for different delivery scenarios, you are in a good position. As I said, for me (and if course this isn't true for everyone) that 'moment' felt mythical. Or at least, I had that moment seeing my baby in my dh's arms (and again when his big sister first came to the hospital).

Also-you aren't letting your baby down? How could you be? You have a fear, and you are managing it to the best of your ability. There is no need to berate yourself. And no birth hierarchy. You are having a baby. She will come out one way or another and you will love her.

Occurred to me- re the anti d, I had mine while I was still under. A midwife had to go into battle to get it for me-usually they do a blood test after to see if you still need it. But I persuaded them to give it to me anyway, before I was conscious, to bypass another needle. Also had TAPP injections, again while under, to minimise the pain of the wound. Finally, the blood thinning injections were much more copable with after EMLA cream (make sure you get some) and about 15 mins after my morphine dose-so helpful to time it so that you are at your most relaxed while you are still taking it.

Trying to think if there is anything else useful to pass on... Shout if I've forgotten to cover anything.

Abitwobblynow · 22/01/2012 17:43

Errrrm... you might be in so much pain you will be screaming for them to 'get it in'?

One thing I learned in labour: it's way bigger than you are. You have no control and you are looking for help. So you never know, your needle phobia might be chased from your mind as you are completely overwhelmed by the giant hand crushing your guts ...

Good luck!

Kayano · 22/01/2012 19:01

I somehow doubt it Confused

OP posts:
StickyGhost · 23/01/2012 23:16

I had an EMCS Kayano, and like you I have a problem with needles, not quite as bad as you I don't think, but I have to have my DP with me to even contemplate blood tests and then there are tears and shaking and I've passed out before. I don't know if this makes sense but my fear actually seemed to be a lot worse when I was pregnant, the terror was doubled. Maybe this was partly the hormones or something.

Anyway, what I want to say is that, if you do come to the point of having an EMCS you may not be as scared as you think - I was so exhausted and in so much pain, plus absolutely desperate to have that baby out, that the spinal block was like 'meh, so what, just please do it!' I didn't even feel it tbh. I even had a drip for 24 hours as I was induced, and somehow I managed it, despite it being the worst thing I could have imagined ever beforehand. Something took over and just made the fear pretty much go away.
There is some truth in what Abitwobbly says, maybe fears are temporarily repressed by some natural instinct or the extreme situation (or something like that!). As easy as it is for me to say, and as hard as it will be for you, please try not to worry too much about what might be. Good luck with everything. I hope you'll come and post when you've had your LO and share how it went. x

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