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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

I am an 'ideal candidate for a homebirth' but it scares me!

17 replies

mabel1973 · 18/01/2006 11:29

I had never considered a homebirth before, but my midwife has just booked me in and is trying to convince me that it's a good idea. My first reaction was 'NO WAY!'
I had DS in hospital and it wasn't the most pleasant experience, but I felt like I was 'in the right place' especially in case anything went wrong.
I suppose i need to look in to it more before I write it off completely, so would like to hear from anyone who had the same initial reaction as me, but went ahead with it and whether it was a good or bad decision.

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zubb · 18/01/2006 12:05

Hi mabel, there are quite a few home birthers on here, and quite a few threads on it all.
If your first birth was straight forward then there's no reason why a home birth shouldn't suit you.
I had a hospital birth for ds1, an unplanned home birth for ds2 and a planned home birth with ds3 - so I have covered all possible angles!
How far away from a hospital are you? You will have a midwife with you for the homebirth and they will transfer you to the hospital at the first sign of you needing to go (IYSWIM).
Do you have any other reservations about it? My dh thought it would be messy, but the midwifes are great and clean everything up!

SoupDragon · 18/01/2006 12:09

Remember that you can change your mind and opt to go into hospital at any time.

Statistically speaking, a homebirth is actually safer than a hospital birth for uncomplicated pregnancies (and somewhere in my NCT stuff I have the stats).

What was your first labour like?

Have a look here on homebirth.org.uk

I'm told that after a homebirth it's blissful to shower/bath in your own bathroom and snuggle up in your own bed!

purpleturtle · 18/01/2006 12:14

Mabel, I remember the midwife trying to persuade me into homebirth the first time round. No way!

But I had a really straightforward pregnancy and labour (apart from meconium which made a very late appearance and would probably h ave meant me having to go to hospital after I'd given birth).

2nd time round I had a homebirth. And I'm hoping for another in August. It really is so lovely to be in your own bed afterwards, with nowhere to go.

But you don't have to be forced into it.

Original poster

mabel1973 · 18/01/2006 12:15

I guess I am scared about the pain relief (had to have an epidural with DS), and complications - and yes - the mess!
Haven't discussed it with DH yet and I suppos he needs to have some say in the decision.

OP posts:

purpleturtle · 18/01/2006 12:17

That's a big point, actually. As I only had g&a with the first one, i wasn't too nervous 2nd time round, and actually didn't use g&a at all then, just birthing pool.

It is your choice, not your midwife's at the end of the day.

purpleturtle · 18/01/2006 12:18

No mess, btw, so long as stuff is covered beforehand.

laundrylover · 18/01/2006 12:24

Hi Mabel,

Not much advice bit I am booked for a homebirth in March and am getting quite into the idea! I've booked a hot tub too as never made it into the pool last time at hospital.
For me the advantages are not being away from my little girl and just keeping everything as normal as posible. However I am only a few miles from the hospital if things should go wrong...
There are bound to be some homebirthers on your ante natal thread so put out a shout on there too...

Original poster

mabel1973 · 18/01/2006 12:43

are there any particular reqirements of your home needed for a home birth.
our house isn't that big and the bathroom is tiny.....

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Original poster

mabel1973 · 18/01/2006 12:44

sorry the midwife didn't bother going in to too much detail after my initial reaction so I don't very much about it at all, but will have a look at the home birth link soupdragon.

OP posts:

maretta · 18/01/2006 12:50

I had my ds2 at home last September and it was wonderful.

There's no need to worry about the mess. The midwife even started cleaning the kitchen. You can protect your mattress and buy really cheap plastic sheeting for the floor from b&q.

Why not request a homebirth and then see how you feel about it in a few months time. You can always chenge your mind if your not comfortable with the idea.

hewlettsdaughter · 18/01/2006 13:02

mabel - I was interested in the idea of homebirth but wasn't brave enough to plan one with my first baby - in the event he came so quickly he was born at home anyway! My second baby was a planned homebirth - I can't imagine what hospital birth is like really (that scares me!).

If any part of you is interested in the idea, then do some research and decide if it's for you or not. It's your decision in the end though, not your midwife's.

Aero · 18/01/2006 13:18

Ds2 was born at home and I can honestly say it was the best of three deliveries. Ds1 in hospital with a wonderful midwife and fully working epidural made the experience a happy one. For dd I thought a home birth would be nice, but like you I was worried about pain, so in the end, i got cold feet and went to hospital - big mistake. Was too far along for epidural to work, so I experienced the pain anyway with a dreadfully unsympathetic midwife and decoided there and then that should I ever have another baby, it would not be in a hospital!!
And so after a few more years ds2 came along and I was true to my word - by this stage the thought of going to hospital was much worse than any pain I'd feel. As it was, I had entinox which I hardly used and a fantastic midwife who was with me from start to finish and filled me with confidence and ds2 arrived to a very much more relaxed mummy. Everything was cleared up by the time I came out of the shower and the sheets were even in the wash (dh sorted that out)! Fresh bed, fresh mummy and gorgeous new baby......wonderful.
I also found I rested better at home. In hospital, I was so desperate to leave, I never rested properly after either of the first two were born. With ds2, I didn't leave the bedroom (except to use the loo) for two days and felt soooooooo much better for it.
I recommend it to anyone who can. Having said all that, it is your choice, so don't feel pressurized into it.

Katemum · 18/01/2006 20:16

I had my first in a midwife unit attached to a hospital but could not settle for all the time i was there and just wanted to be home.
Had a planned homebirth for my second and it was wonderful. Had a sheet like a large papmers care mat on the bed that the midwife wrapped up and took away with her. While i was in the bath she changed my sheets and bunged the used ones in the washing machine and my house looked as good as new.
I felt i was in the right place for me and would do it again if i hadn't decided that two is more than enough.

Wallace · 18/01/2006 20:28

I'm tempted too for number three due in July. One thing that worries me is the I'd have to make sure that the house was clean and tidy for the midwives coming....but maybe the nesting instincts would take care of that!

I think I would still want ds and dd to be somewhere else, being looked after by someone else so dh and I could have that wonderful special time with the new baby.

BonyM · 18/01/2006 20:39

DD2 was born at home last March and it was far and away a better experience than dd1's hospital birth.

Pain relief - I am the biggest wimp going and begged for an epidural with dd1. With dd2 I managed with just gas and air and a birthing pool(fab btw!). I am still astonished that I did it!

Mess - yep - bought a rug to cover a bad stain on the living room carpet (carpet is shortly being replaced). We did put cheap shower curtains and old sheets down everywhere (or so I thought) but I ended up giving birth on a bit which wasn't covered!

Complications - I suffered a post-partum haemorrage and had to go to hospital for the night for observation. Was fine though. Blame myself for opting for physiological 3rd stage - after 45mins, no sign of placenta so had the injection which is when they discovered that blood had been building up behind the placenta.

Despite the above, if I were to have any more I would def. have another home birth. I felt much more in control (which I am sure made me able to cope with the pain better) and had the undivided attention of 2 wonderful midwifes - try getting that in hospital!

Dh has dead set against when I first broached the suject of home birth with him but he is now one of its greatest advocates and tells anyone who'll listen, how wonderful it was!

If you are reasonable close to a hospital (we are just 10 mins drive away) then I would def. go for it. You have to be comfortable with your decision though and it's not for everyone.

emmared1980 · 20/01/2006 18:21

I would say a home birth is much better. More relaxed and its lovely to jump in the bath and snuggle into bed after everything is over. Wake up in the morning with your new baby and take your time with the rest of the day.

Nettee · 21/01/2006 08:11

Most important thing is that you feel safe so that your labour can progress. There are stories of women who planned home births but had to transfer for slow/no progress only to give birth quickly and normally on arrival in hospital. If you feel like hospital is the right place for you then it probably is.

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