Keep waking up in terror

[Garliccheesechips]

With racing thoughts along the lines of:

holycrapIamgoingtohaveababyinthreemonthsWeCan'tAffordItOurFlatIsTinyHowWillIJuggleWorkWhatIfI'mMadeRedundantWhatIfIDon'tLoveTheBabyStraightAwayHowWillICopeWithBreastfeedingWillINeverLoseTheWeightWhatPramShouldIBuyOhMyGodINeedToBuyACarAndLearnToDriveAndWillIEndUpIncontinentWithAGiantFanny.

I'm 27 weeks (DC1) so should have had quite enough time for this whole thing to SINK IN.

It's like delayed shock or something.

If it helps I have two children , the elder nearly five, and occasionally I look at them and think "holy fuck, I am their mother. How did that happen?"

I'm 26w with no 2 and I STILL think all of those things.

Welcome to parenthood. It's fucking terrifying

And breathe...............You'll be fine! I always get very weird dreams when I'm pregnant, and usually quite scary too. I'm sure it's something to do with the hormones or something making us more nervy so more able to spot danger for the baby (or so I try to rationalise it to myself).

With DS1 I used to wake up wondering if I should try to get pregnant this year or wait for a bit longer - I was 17 weeks at the time. Hey ho.

Oh good. I thought it was a nervous breakdown.

Thanks everyone. :)

LOL Cairn at wondering if you should try. Horse, stable door and all that.

Speaking of dreams- I keep having dreams that DP leaves me and that I end up setting up home with Mark Wright from TOWIE. What the actual fuck?

Still, he has a nice torso. Pity he's a cabbage.

new keyboard please after your 'cabbage' comment!!!

my current hormonal moment is wondering whether I've ruined DS's life by getting pregnant again. I'm sure it'll be something different by tomorrow.

Please excuse me, the Gaviscon is calling.........

Oh my God- I spent yesterday repeatedly asking my DP if he felt trapped and if his life was ruined by impending fatherhood and if he resented me blah blah whine whine whine.

I interjected that with asking him if he wants to leave me for someone who doesn't look like they belong in SeaWorld and who farts all day long.

All my excess wind is directed upwards! I am really starting to disgust myself and in Feb (when presumably things will be worse!) I've got 2 important family events and a wedding to go to. Am wondering when I'll get the 'blooming pregnancy look'.

Try not to do a big belch when they ask the 'does anyone here know of any lawful impediment...'

I'm with you on the self disgust. I'm quite looking forward to pooing myself during childbirth though.

And sleeping, what's with the tiredness thing?

I can't keep my eyes open between 2 and 4 and yet now I'm wide awake and yet I know that I have to go to bed to get some sleep before DS wakes up.

AAAAAAaaaahhhhhhh!

The dreaming of Mark Wright thing?

That's NOT normal.

That's the sign of a breakdown right there.

Please call your midwife in the morning

I'm 36 weeks and going through frequent panics like that (1st baby), feeling just like you.

Woke up this morning from a dream where I was on a train going into work but then the rails stopped so the train crashed, I jumped out right at the end and landed on my feet but narrowly avoided landing on loads of debris.

Having a baby is scary!!!!

So I'm freaking out on a regular basis but then the baby will wriggle about or kick me and I feel better. So, I think what youre feeling is normal!!! I'm sure you'll be fine, being in such an unknown situation is just a bit freaky.

The stark realisation when 'actually' pregnant was sooo fucking scary. For me, it was knowing that really, when it came down to, it was me, and me alone that ultimately would be forever, entirely reponsible for this child, whatever happened. Scared the bejeesus out of me.
However, things go ok, they just happen. They pootle along almost without you. Things will be fine. The thought of responsiblilities scare the willies out of me. The day to day getting through things just ticks on by.

Agree with fliss. The worry, terror and general loony dreams never went away for me! Three weeks after DD was born I roughly shook DH awake crying my eyes out saying 'baby pasta is gone, she's been taken from her basket, call 999'. DH leapt out of bed with many OMFGs and promises of painful death to protagonist of said baby snatching to find her snoozing in her basket.

My dreams and I were not popular that night but probably less traumatising overall than shacking up with Mark Wright garlic!

I had another Mark Wright dream.
He was my boyfriend and we were really close. He bought me an iCandy Apple and we went to Lush(!)

Thing is, I don't even fancy the man. I like them...errr a bit more cerebral...
I mean, back in the day I probably would have, just for the craic.

I feel very comforted reading your posts- thank you. The middle of the night freak outs are quite lonely at times.

I sailed through my pregnancy in a state of naive bliss. I woke the morning after DD's delivery in a state of deep shock and fear of what I'd got myself into. The fear recedes a bit but doesn't quite go away...

Oh God Beamur, I'm not sure what is worse..
I keep forgetting how far along I am.
Now that is fucking stupid.

It doesn't matter if you forget - baby will arrive when it's cooked.

GCC, I reckon your sense of humour will get you through. It will all be fine I'm sure. I remember having some very weird dreams and even anxiety attacks when I was pregnant..however they were only worries that were out of control.. things that weren't realistic and I couldn't affect or change..just had to keep under control. Keep thinking about cuddling a new baby who is going to love you and no doubt, laugh a lot with you!

Ah thanks DoulaKate. I can't wait to have a laugh with the baby- though I am trying to manage my expectations- at least in the first month or so...

Have you started NCT or similar yet? I am finding it wildly helpful that everyone is worried about different things. The fact that my horror at the idea of having to look after the cord stump until a rotting bit of my baby falls off and has to be disposed of is matched by the conviction of other couples that they will accidentally drown the baby in the bath is oddly reassuring...

Oh yes, doing NCT in a couple of weeks. I'm pleased you're finding it helpful Snowy. I hear mixed reports from NCT but it would be a different experience for everyone so I decided to give it a go while I still had a small amount of cash to spare..

Nct rocks! I wouldn't do without my ladies two years and two babies on.

If you are open to it, a homeopath could help. There are various remedies which might suit your anxiety. I was convinced something awful would happen during labour and took a remedy to help.