Post traumatic stress?

[Icanonlytry]

Hi, just need to get this off my chest really, have posted on PND board and someone suggested PTS.
Ds is nearly 6 months old, very very quick birth, delivered 10 mins after getting to the hospital, had to sit in the car through full on contractions and feeling like I needed to push on the way to the hospital (thought I was going to deliver before I got to the hospital and midwife said I would have if my membranes weren't so thick), to be honest I think I am struggling to get over it, I know you might think it was better to be so quick and I do feel a bit of a fraud because I know to most people (myself included before this happened) a tough birth lasts a long time/ needs interventions/emergency section... but I went into shock because it was so intense, still having flashbacks all the time and when I went to the hospital for physio a few weeks ago I broke down in the car park and couldn't go in the hospital.
I feel like it is constantly on my mind and I don't know if this is normal, I never felt like this after DD's 7 hour straightforward (after induction) birth.

Labour does not need to be hell on earth in order for you to end up with pts. Mine was "not that bad" and that is what I have been diagnosed with. Having flashbacks is a sign of pts. I actually didn't have them but I'm always asked by therapists etc if I do. I also really really struggled to return to the hospital it happenend in.

Have you talked to gp or hv about it? Also your partner or mum etc. Do not feel a fraud, this is how you feel - you aren't pretending to feel rubbish are you?

I have had therapy and I can honestly say it has helped so much. I can now have a normal conversation with another mum about labour, before I had to literally get away if the topic came up. Has really helped with anxiety and other symptoms.

I too understand exactly what you mean. My last birth was described as "quick and easy" and yet was horrific to me. I too really struggled to go back to the hospital, especially to the labour ward recently for my after thoughts session. Thankfully I have a very understanding midwife who knew what some second births can be like and how the intensity and speed of them means that your head never has chance to catch up with what your body is doing - if that makes sense?!
Anyway, I have been traumatised by last birth to the extent that I am hopefully having an ELCS for the baby I am currently carrying.
I would say that having the after thoughts session was a good thing for me, though it was really tough, to actually realise that I could not necessarily of been expected to cope with what happened made me feel better. I guess in some ways you have to face what happened, which I put off for 3 years. Also, i found personally having this session with someone who didn't know me and wasn't there at the time was better for me.

It is worth seeing a counsellor who specialises in post/peri-natal counselling as they are much better equiped to help you work through birth issues.