I'll try to condense this as it's a bit of a waffley long story. I am 39 weeks.
Basically I want a home birth and due to two dodgy BP readings where the lower figure was over 100 (taken within half an hour of each other during a period of high stress), despite lots and lots of subsequent readings where it is nowhere near 100, I am now finding myself up against a consultant who has decided I am high risk. Yay.
This is contrary to all the available evidence - baby is fine and healthy, I have no symptoms of anything, no protein or pre-eclampsia, no subsequent dodgy BP readings and have consented to taking a low dose of beta-blockers in order to placate the consultant.
Consultant said that according to NICE guidelines she wanted to medicate me and induce at 39 weeks (i.e. today).
I asked her what the evidence base was behind this and she couldn't answer me, just said that was what the NICE guidelines said. I've read them. They don't say that at all. They say induction should be offered and discussed with the woman if the BP is 160/110. Mine is consistantly hovering around the 140/80 mark and I am measuring it myself several times a day to make a point.
I told her that I am still planning a homebirth as I feel induction if the baby and my body are not ready is likely to lead to extremely high BP and major interventions, and whilst I recognise that if my BP goes up in labour I will have to transfer in, I have always known that is possible and am completely prepared for that. I just want to at least start off at home instead of being medicalised from square one. The consultant's plan would mean no homebirth, no MLU, no pool. All my coping strategies gone in one fell swoop.
I believe that by trying to take the route of least stress I am giving the baby and myself the best chance of a good delivery without intervention that could be damaging to both of us. I do not believe that I am putting either of us at additional risk. I am not two numbers on a sheet of paper; I am a human being who reacts badly to medical people stressing me out!
I'm seeing my lovely CMW today to discuss and I hope she will be supportive, but I feel really guilty and depressed about all of this. I should be excited about meeting my baby. Instead I feel like crying all day.
Has anyone else ended up in this sort of situation? Any advice? If you're just going to tell me 'OMG you're stupid home births are dangerous' then please don't bother, I have done a lot of research and they're really not.