Refusing forceps

[LilBB]

When I had DD she was lying sideways for most of the labour so could not deliver naturally. Whilst we were waiting to see if she would move they explained what would happen if she didn't move. I already had an epidural so they would top that up. Move me to theatre, give me an episiotomy and try to turn DD with forceps but be ready to do a CS immediately if this failed. I decided if she didn't move there was no way I was potentially having to recover from forceps and CS so I would refuse forceps. She moved herself in the end an I delivered vaginally.

Anyway I'm now pregnant with DC2 and even though im only 12+6 I've been thinking about the birth a lot. I don't expect what happened with DD to happen again but I want to know where I stand with refusing forceps whatever the circumstance? Since DD I've seen a lot about how they aren't used as much and doctors dont have the experience to use them. I also know some countries have stopped using them. Has anyone done this? Will they tell me or will they just use them? Is it sensible to refuse them?

My son was born 11 weeks ago now and I ended up with an episiotomy and forceps when they told us that I was being prepped for a theatre birth we I broke down and was terrified of the horror stories of forceps however it was because ds had turned and was side on. As soon as the epidural was in the relief had just taken over and it was just a matter of minutes till I finally met him. There were 8 people in my room and the most senior surgeon talked me through what was happening even telling me that he was about to turn the baby just with his hand not the forceps! It took about 9 days for me to feel considerably better from the stitches and by 3 weeks everything was fine x

It depends on the type of forceps. I would not have consented to Kielland's forceps. At that point I’d far rather have a section. However, by the time they are at the point of using normal forceps I don’t think you have a lot of choice. I remember the Dr getting them out and despite having seen them in NCT classes I just stared at him and what the fuck are those things-’ I’d been very polite and quiet up until that point so they were a bit surprised and I think I was freaking out a bit. In the end he thought he’d have a good chance with vontouse so went for those first but despite hating the idea of forceps I would have consented. My baby was getting distressed and needed help to come out. There wasn’t really much other choice.

Having just come from a meeting at the hospital due to what can only be described as a barbaric birth a year ago, I would urge anyone to seriously consider what they find acceptable for their birth.
I stated very clearly from the onset that I did not consent to episiotomies, forceps or any assisted delivery.
It made no difference. I was induced under false pretences. To cut a long story short, the consultant (whom I only met once) informed me that my baby was at risk when I went for an ultrasound scan 2 at 40w2days. I was told that the baby was not growing and there was a problem with the placenta. LIES. Ironically, an hour before I had the misfortune to meet the elusive consultant, the sonographer had commented on how the baby was fine and blood flow and placenta was functioning well. The 'consultant' then coerced me into agreeing to IOL by telling me I risked stillbirth and that it would be on my conscience if anything happened to the baby. She was an evil bitch. I got hold of my notes and the baby was born 4 days alter almost 1lb heavier than estimated weight and placenta was fine.
They will do ANYTHING they like. They do not listen.
I had the induction, suffered a rare reaction to the drugs which caused hyperstimulation and distressed the baby no end. I had to have an antidote to the drugs and ended up with an epidural because my body had been put under so much strain. Things did calm down for a while and to be honest I was bored as I couldn't feel or do anything.
This lasted for 23 hours. Then, the consultant declared I was fully dilated. Great! Give it 2 hours then he'd come back for pushing. I pushed for an hour and a half. Nothing. Midwife got consultant. Consultant announced I was going to theatre for trial of instrumental delivery! My partner thought I was going to die. So did I. He told me the baby was distressed. I was wheeled away protesting, but they would not stop. Got to theatre. By this time I really thought I was going to die. They forgot about my partner and I had to tell them to get him. No one spoke to me. The staff were horrible. This Indian doctor told me they can't do a forceps delivery (!) which I didn't know they were and said I needed a section.
Section done, horrific.
One year on. Found out nothing wrong with baby. They simply couldn't be bothered to wait any longer. I am so, so angry. Also, they dismissed my pleas for no forceps and were going to hack away at me. I'm so lucky thae baby was too high up or the damage could have been horrific. I think forceps are barbaric. There's a reason they are banned.
I'm one year along and still in pain from the section. My life will never be the same again, and it's all so avoidable. I don't have a crystal ball, so who knows what may have happened, but I do know one thing for sure. I would not have been in that hospital on 25/11/2017. I have had a meeting regarding a formal complaint regarding this and other disgraceful things they did to me, such as forcing me into stirrups and making fun of me during the section and catheterising me and giving suppositories without consent (the consent form had been doctored by a nurse). I lost my dignity that night and it was through fault of my own.
I'm writing this to warn people that even if you say 'no', they will do what the hell they want regardless. In hindsight I would have said 'If you do that to me then I will sue you for assault when I get out of here'. I think that's the only way to stop them.
I really wanted a second child, but can't bear the thought of it now so they really have ruined my life. I won't let my partner near me as I'm so disgusted with what they did to me.
I've had CBT and EDMR therapy. Useless. I have been diagnosed with PTSD and it's pretty bad. But do they care? Not at all. They just said if it was on my notes than I must have said yes. I also pointed out that my notes said I was 12 stone when I am 8 stone and that I believe they overmedicated me. They have agreed the error with the weight (it's ridiculous if you could see me) but just say it's down to human error. Rubbish! The staff are incompetent and clueless. Don't let anyone loose with dangerous instruments if you are not 100% comfortable with it as you may end up like me.
I have been offered a referral with their plastic surgeon as the surgeon who butchered me won't see me (scared I think). It's a disgrace. I absolutely hate the nhs for this. Sorry for the rant, but it just made me mad that they think they can get away with utchering women for no good reason.

I had a forceps delivery with my first three days ago. I was exhausted after three hours of pushing but baby was back-to-back and wouldn’t budge. I would have said beforehand that forceps was something I wouldn’t want but actually by the time it came I was just glad to have the help. The epidural was brilliant and I didn’t feel any pain from the forceps or the stitches. I’m a bit sore down below but otherwise fine and my baby has a tiny red mark on one side of his face which has almost gone already. I was glad to avoid a C section as they can be more risky in the late stages of labour.

Forceps have a really bad reputation on here so just wanted to say that some people do have a positive experience.

Darkstar4855 You may not say that if you discover in a few months that they've ravaged your pelvic floor and made you incontinent, and that's not to mention the other hideous side effects. I wouldn't recommend looking for a while.
There's a reason why much of the western world have banned them.
I hope you recover well, maybe you'll be lucky, but they are notoriously dangerous and rather outdated to say the least.

What do countries who have banned forceps do instead, in a situation where a baby isn't budging? Just wait for longer, despite that increasing risk for the baby?

I can understand that lots of people commenting on here have had bad experiences, and often not been treated with full respect. However, I think it's going a bit far to basically accuse the NHS of systematically acting in bad faith - inflicting unnecessary injuries on women for the sake of convenience. I'm not saying there aren't some doctors who would do that and are just a bit arrogant or work on autopilot, but most will be proceeding on the basis of avoiding the worst outcomes for the mother and baby.

The other thing is that ELCS comes with its own risks. As someone currently weighing up pros and cons of VBAC vs ELCS, I can see that of course ELCS is most likely preferable to a birth with trauma and injury. But you don't get to choose that, you get to choose attempting vaginal birth with all the risks that entails, versus opting for ELCS with all the risks that entails. Hindsight is a wonderful thing.

Hindsight is a wonderful thing indeed.
Fact is, the NHS is cost cutting and would rather risk maiming someone rather than spend the money on a c section.
It's all about money and most of the doctors are not trained in using instruments. It's a very difficult thing to do which is why so many women are injured.
Doctors are arrogant. They compete with each other. I've heard of this happening so many times. A hospital in Dundee used to have a thing going where the doctors would compete for the women to do the c sections on. It's a disgrace, quite frankly.
All they're bothered about are statistics and the statistic which is prevalent at the moment is the amount of c sections carried out. It's under the WHO's radar so they will do whatever they can to avoid having to explain themselves. They don't care if the woman is incontinent for the rest of her life. They care about themselves. Period.