40+2 today - struggling with fear of induction

[jojomo]

Help! Am becoming hysterically anxious at the thought of induction at some point over the next 12 days - I was induced last time (4 years ago) and ended up with an epidural which went wrong leading to a dural tap which was utterly excruciating. 10 days in hospital, headaches like I have never experienced before, appalling post natal care and I couldn't walk properly for months. It took me 3 years to even contemplate having another child but now here I am...40+2 days, no sign of labour and I can't stop the nightmares and am crying all the time. I have planned a homebirth to avoid hospitals altogether but if the baby won't come on his own what can i do? I won't risk the baby by waiting indefinitely...but I can't contemplate induction again. What the hell can i do???!!!

Hi, I'm 40 +1 today and am feeling the same. I had horrid hospital experience with ds1 so had ds2 at home which was amazing. want a homebirth this time too...

I don't know if it's different policy in different places but here you can go 12 days before induction and my midwife told me this week that they will let you go to 14 if you are prepared to be monitored.

My plan is to have a stretch and sweep at 40+6 (already had one at 39+6) and then if that doesn't work I'm going to have acupuncture. I've had it for various things in the last few years and its been really successful. Had this baby turned from breech with it. I've had a few friends whose babies have been induced by the lady I go and see.

Maybe there is an acupuncturist in your area who can induce labour, It's worth a try I reckon. Anything to avoid hospital!!

In the meantime I'm going to try all the old wives tales and bounce like a loony on my birth ball - good luck

Hospital policy may be to induce at +10/12/14 but that doesn't mean you have to agree to it - normal pregnancy is 37-42 weeks, so you're not even overdue til after 42 weeks.

Is it worth weighing up the risks for yourself and deciding if you want to go with induction or monitoring?

One is not "overdue" before being 42 weeks and even then you do not have to agree to anything you do not want.

Can I reassure you all? My first labour was awful, induction/ventouse etc.

I was petrified about No 2, and while painful, it was quick and bearable and I felt much more in control.

Make sure your MW knows how out of control you felt previously, ask for his/her support in keeping you involved in all decisions at all times. It helped me to have a debrief before I had No 2, and the lady who debriefed me was my MW on the day, which was lovely.

By the time I was induced with No 3, it was like shelling peas. The lass who was a trainee for DC2 was my MW for No 3....not that we saw much of her - she barely had time to get her gloves on!

Thanks for posting! Will certainly investigate acupuncture - glad that it has worked for you with various things Frida75, it's always good to hear of something positive. x

Sounds like a terrible experience OP, no wonder you're feeling anxious. I had bad experience with DC1 - not as bad as you from the sounds of it, but was in and out of hospital for ages after birth. Awful.

But on positive note acupuncture is really good idea - I think it definitely helped get my body ready last time. And induction isn't always a nightmare if it's properly managed - I've been induced twice. First time was pretty awful. Second time (when I was on the drip, waters had broken but labour not started) I explained to midwife how anxious I was and she was really good - did it all very slowly - started with very low dose and increased it in really slow stages. Labour was actually very straightforward and I only had a couple of mouthfuls of g&a before DD was born. Might it be worth going and talking to a friendly midwife about what happened last time and why you're so worried? Definitely helped me to not panic about being on the same inevitable course with the second. Experiences were totally different - I look back with real fondness on my labour with DD.

I know this is no help at all, but your anxiety will be making it all feel worse and probably less likely labour will start. I have suffered from really bad anxiety in the past so know it's not as simple as just telling yourself not to worry, but might be worth trying to distance what you're feeling in your head with how you're holding it in your body - does that make any sense at all? Worth trying some yoga breathing/going for a walk/massage/baths? A swim? Anything that helps you physically relax. I also listened to a hypnobirthing CD a few times before I had DD (but literally only 3-4 times - still helped keep me calm though). I am by nature not at all an accepting person, but have learned the hard way that you don't get to plan much about being a parent, and the birth is only the start of it. Perfectly sensible to know what you would prefer, but ultimately better if you get into the mindset that you have to accept whatever is going to happen and go with it. Very best of luck.