What did you do with dc1 when giving birth to dc2?

[mikimoo]

I'm a little bit worried about what we will do with ds1 when i have my next one in October. Obviously dh wants to be there but we live in London, a long way from any family and friends who could look after ds whilst I am in hospital. Even if they were willing to come and stay for the time around my due date, i might be early and they couldn't get here in time.

Anyone else have/had similar issues?

We were in the same situation, all family about 2 hrs away and no close friends nearby either. With Dc3 we needed someone to look after the other 2, thankfully 3 lots of neighbours, none of whom we know that well, all offered to step in if we needed, as did various playgroup / school Mum's, this was all without me asking! Thankfully I had enough warning, phoned FIL as soon as I thought something might be starting and he drove up arriving in time. Dh then drove me to hospital but came home to help with Dcs until I was ready to pop at which point he drove back to be with me in hospital. Hope you get something sorted. You'd be amazed how willing and helpful people can be so just ask someone, you can offer to return the favour one day!

We were in the same situation when ds2 was born. We arranged for my MIL to come and stay and fortunately ds2 arrived a day early and she was there. We had a much less good plan B but luckily didn't need it, as it would have invloved ds1 staying at someone else's house and he was only 14 months old and not used to being away from us.

Was your DS on time, late or early?

I had to have dd1 with me and DH for the entire labour and birth. We don't have any family in the UK and we had organised my mum to fly over from Canada when I was 37 weeks pregnant with dd2, but dd2 had other ideas and arrived at 36 weeks. I had a friend on standby but she is a teacher and was working on the day I gave birth so that was not an option either. Fortunately, dd1 wasn't quite 13 months when dd2 was born so I think it was ok for her to be there, and the midwife didn't seem to mind either.

I was just wondering the same thing. My daughter is 7 and I'm 33 weeks pregnant. My Mum lives abroad and the in laws live about an hour away.
We get on well with our next door neighbours and they have a daughter the same age so I might ask if she can go there although it's not ideal.(DD doesn't like it there very much)

We have no family locally. Our friends had ds1 overnight for us. We knew (the week before) when ds2 was going to arrive though (planned section as breech) so it was pretty easy to organise. We went for dinner with them the night before, and he stayed over. They had him all the next day too until I was back on the ward, and then my friend brought him to the hospital.

They would have had ds1 whenever (even middle of the night) but it was good it worked out as it did! Dh was working away at the time ds2 was due, so N was also my reserve birth partner in case he didn't get back. She's also ds2's godmother

No idea what I'd have done without them tbh.

i think you should speak to the midwife about this situation and say that you might have to have your dd with you, alternatively have you considered home birth?

we were in a similar situation, our family lives abroad.
what we did was making a list of people who could take care of dc1.
one nursery nurse who lives close by and knows dc1 well, one neighbour from a few houses down and my best friend who lives a little further out.
we asked them if they would jump in when the time comes and then we gave each a telephone list of the others and also a daily routing of dc1 with all the important information.
in the end my best friend looked after dc1 and they had a great day together.

I asked my DS1 to stay in the living room whilst I had DD1 on the bathroom floor ! Bit of a quick home delivery - but my boy was very brave and loved the ambulance arriving with lights & sirens !

icantbelieve i was the same, my 2 girls miraculously stayed in the front room watching tv all morning while i laboured and gave birth to ds! not a peep out of them! even with ambulance coming and everything!

Hi there,
I'd definitely raise this with your midwife as I know they can be a bit funny about children in hospitals.

In order to ensure you all stay together, and that nobody's worrying about anyone else, maybe ask for a home birth- community midwives are used to slotting into family life.

Whenever my siblings were born (all at home) we were allowed unlimited access to biscuits and a new game or two usually made an appearance. I don't know of anybody that's had a negative experieence of witnessing a birth as a small child actually.

If you'd rather go into hospital maybe think about hiring a doula in the knowledge that at least this way round DC1 is in safe and familiar hands.

Just a thought. Good luck sorting out your wishes.

we arranged childcare for the day (had date for induction). however, DC2 decided to arrive in the middle of the night just hours before I was due to go to hospital to be induced. DH took me to hospital and we took DC1 (2.5 at that time) with us. we went together to the delivery suite and I got ready for the pool. then I sent DH with DC1 out. they were walking the corridors. luckily DC was born after only 15 mins in the pool. MW called DH and DC1 back into the room when the baby was born and it was lovely being there all four of us. only downside was that DH missed the moment DC2 popped into this world.

Wow! Thank you all for your responses - mixed and varied! I don't think I'll be able to have a home birth though as due to various complications and an ensuing c section last time, I'm pretty sure the midwife will say no. I suppose i could ask for a c section again as at least I'll know the date but I'd really rather do it naturally if i can.

We have lovely neighbours around us so I'm hoping we might be able to ask a few favours when the time comes. We don't know them that well but maybe it's a good excuse to get to know them!

Thanks lovely mums x