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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Original poster

How did you thank your midwives?

50 replies

morningpaper · 15/10/2005 20:32

I had such great care when delivering my second daughter this week. I am just composing a letter for the midwife unit.

Did you thank you midwives for good care? What did you say/do?

OP posts:
MrsSpoon · 15/10/2005 20:35

I sent a card after having DS1, to thank the midwives who helped and in particular those who took the time to sit with me whilst I struggled to b/f.

I think (although I can't remember clearly) I sent a card to the midwife who delivered DS2 as she was fantastic, I was only on the ward a couple of hours so don't think I bothered with the ward this time round.

Nemo666 · 15/10/2005 20:37

we got a card and box of choccies[tin of roses i think]for all on labour ward and a small bunch of flowers for the mw who helped me labour and deliver with ds.

milesysgirl · 15/10/2005 20:39

hi mp i had brilliant care too. i always ment to write a letter and send some choclate and flowers to them all, but i never got round to it i just completly forgot ,i think its such a lovely idea ,its one of the most important times of your life and its soo much nicer if you have a helpfull and supporting lot around you .Cant belive i forgot

KBear · 15/10/2005 20:40

Not the first time (because it was awful!) but the second time I felt moved to write to one particular midwife who was the one I saw at my booking in appointment and by coincidence came on duty and into the theatre as DS was about to be born by c-section. She seemed to genuinely care about me and my DH and DS. She was so kind when I first found out I was pregnant and was terrified about delivering another baby and mopped my tears and sorted me out emotionally.

I wrote to thank her and her team for truly making a difference to my delivery and after care and my state of mind afterwards.

I heard back from my HV that she was moved by my letter and it meant alot to her.

I just wanted her to know she was doing a fantastic job.

LadySherlockofLGJ · 15/10/2005 20:45

I didn't leave anything as a few of them tried to kill me.

They refused to accept that I couldn't breathe and insisted that I was just exhausted.

Eh Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

My heart was failing. Very rare if there are any MTB reading this. I was so angry that I left nothing.

When I calmed down, a year later, I went back on DS 1st birthday with chocolates for the MW station and a bottle of champagne for my main midwife and my consultant.

Cam · 15/10/2005 20:45

With dd1 I said thank you
With dd2 I didn't speak but gave the m/w a great big hug - she then said thank you to me!

mumfor1sttime · 15/10/2005 20:46

We didnt thank our midwives.

myermay · 15/10/2005 20:46

Message withdrawn

spidermama · 15/10/2005 20:47

I wrote a really honest, emotional card while I was still awash with lovely baby hormones. I also bought them a really pretty stained glass hangy thing to put on their windows. (One each).

ThomBat · 15/10/2005 20:52

I didn't. The actual midwife, the one who was with me the whole time, well she did a good job but she also pissed me off a bit to be honest. I'd just given birth and was holding my new born daughter, sat on the birthing stoll delivering my placenta, nice, when I said 'ummmm she look a bit like she ummm might maybe errrrrrr have Down's syndrome!????????????????', to which she replied 'yes she does'. FULL STOP. Not sure what happened next but know I didn't see her again for another 3 days. The rest of the women in the birthing centre who came and sat and chatted to me on the end of the bed, bought us tea, held me, they rocked and as I speant the next 5 days with them, they knew from our talks how much they helped me and what that meant.

fairydust · 15/10/2005 20:55

I sent a thanks you card a box of throntons chocolate i got to know the midwifes atthe hospital pretty well as i was admitted several times through out my pregnancey

LadySherlockofLGJ · 15/10/2005 20:56

TC

I hope you reported her.

The main one who refused to accept I was in heart failure(not that I knew that, but I knew enough to know I needed oxygen.) had to do some retraining.

karmamother · 15/10/2005 21:01

morningpaper, when I was a student midwife, a woman I delivered wrote to the senior MW praising both me & the qualified MW with me. It was a wonderful gesture & it meant such a lot to me. In fact, I still have the letter somewhere.
After reading some of the posts on here, it seems you are in the minority if you get a good MW.

As a nurse, it's always great when the chocolates arrive & most nurses/MWs are alcoholics anyway, so a bottle of wine always goes down well!!(speaking personally)

Blossomhowl · 15/10/2005 21:08

The first midwife no as I really wasn't happy with the way my labour was handled.

Second sent in a card and some chocolates and told her just how much her support had meant.

codface · 15/10/2005 21:12

letter

ThomBat · 15/10/2005 21:19

I didn't report her no, I had other things to think about, she certainly lacked in bedside manner though. the worst women was the peadatrician who called us into a side room to 'break the news' Lottie did have DS and it was translocation DS. I sat down ready to hear what she had to say, next to D, and she said 'could I ask you to move to the chair there with the protective plastic cover, incase you're still bleeding'. I laugh looking back on it, but wanted to ram her badly applied lipsticked face into the door. I loathed her from then on and she didn't let me down, D and I never failed to want her as far away from us as possible. She told us that translocation meant either D and I were carriers of the extra chromosome, when asked what this meant we were told that future childrne would have DS, so she tried to push us, day 3 of Lottie's life, to go for genetic testing and conselling. We told her to go away. They teach you how to medically care for people, they don't teach oyu how to treat people aye.

helloween · 15/10/2005 21:21

Frst time didn't do anything, midwives were fine (I think we saw out about 4 shifts) but the birth was traumatic and the Dr was horrid; second time DH was so impressed by the support of the midwife who was with us for the whole of her shift until I had the baby that he sent her a huge bouquet of flowers of his own accord, and a note saying she had made it a fantsstic experience. No idea how she felt but hope it made her happy.

LadySherlockofLGJ · 15/10/2005 21:22

That is disgraceful.

Too shocked to be able to post anything remotely articulate.

logic · 15/10/2005 21:30

I took them two big boxes of chocolates and a thank you card both times and they seemed really pleased. Then again, they were a bunch of angels both times and they really cared about us. Bless 'em.

bonym · 15/10/2005 21:37

Dh gave them a bottle of champagne each as they left the house(there were two of them as I had a home birth). They were really chuffed.

jenkel · 15/10/2005 21:42

Both times, a box of chocolates, a card and a photo of dh, me and baby 1st time around at home and 2nd time around, dh, me baby and dd

jenkel · 15/10/2005 21:42

Both times, a box of chocolates, a card and a photo of dh, me and baby 1st time around at home and 2nd time around, dh, me baby and dd

frannykenstein · 15/10/2005 21:57

I made them little hampers filled with food and toiletry treats, a card and photo of ds, and some very sloppy hormone-driven drivel written inside. This was for the two midives who attended me through the pregnancy: as I was booked in for a home birth they undertook all my antenatal appointments and I got to know them very well. The actual midwife during the birth was sweet but didn't actually deliver ds - we had loads of different staff in as there were lots of problems and it was all a bit of a shambles. "My" midwife came to visit withim hours and that meant a lot to me.

Kelly1978 · 15/10/2005 21:58

when I had natural births I was so out of it, concentrating on birthign I really don't remember the midwives remotely. i didn't even know their names. They were lovely, but I couldn't recall them to thank them.

I bumped into the anethestist from my section a few weeks later, and he was this lovely bloke, a black guy. He says hello, adn I was wonderign where the hell I know him from, not knowign any black blokes personally. I kept wondering if it was a friends dh or something. I didn't twig til a lot later! i would have liked to have thanked him, cos he was the only person in that hospital that day with any compassion.

aloha · 15/10/2005 22:03

I'd happily dance on the graves of mine. Vile bitches, every one. The surgeon and anaesthetist, totally different matter. They were fantastic.

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