Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

Transistion! Scared after this week's OBEM

42 replies

cocoachannel · 16/02/2011 08:44

Hi everyone,

I'm 39 weeks today and until watching this week's OBEM I have been relatively naive calm about my baby's birth. I am now however terrified about the transition stage and losing control!

I realise the programme is edited for dramatic effect and that I was daft to watch...but I wonder whether anyone has any advice or tips either for me or my husband (only birth partner) to use during this particular stage or even more generally.

Many thanks!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Original poster

cocoachannel · 16/02/2011 08:45

Oops- 'transition' even. So scary I've lost my ability to spell.

OP posts:

mrspear · 16/02/2011 08:48

I did panic, my excuse was the baby was being born early, i tried turning and crawling up the bed whilst saying someething like "i can't do this; i want to go home" but they flipped back in the right position and then i got stern words from the doctor. She said "your first job as a mother is to get this baby out, now PUSH!" It worked - baby was out 10 minutes later.

So advise is that you may need stern words - just warn dh; so that he doesn't panic and hide at the back of the bed like mine.

Crawling · 16/02/2011 08:58

I was not scared on either of my births till transition, but it let MW know I was really close, and was over quickly and not really that bad.

My MW talked to me in a calm soft voice and said 'Crawling you are only panicing because your baby is coming. You are doing brilliant and this will be over soon try to relax' I did after that I just needed reasurance. Transition is natural because it lets us know birth is imminent and to get somewhere safe, (really olden days) or now we use it to get to a mw.

Cleofartra · 16/02/2011 08:59

Over the next few weeks just look at all the mums in the street and think - she's done it and so can I. Unlike the governments cuts, we are all truly in it together, and we get through it and usually come out the other end smiling. Having a hung-ho, 'bring it on' attitude does really help in the run up to labour I think. And when the time comes just get your head down and focus on getting through one minute at a time. Or have an epidural as soon as you're in active labour and bypass the whole transition experience!

FetchezLaVache · 16/02/2011 09:08

I didn't panic as such, but I did suddenly feel a bit weird! The pain suddenly got worse and I didn't know how I would cope if it got exponentially worse than that (as it had grown more intense all day). However, most people will tell you that that transition is as bad as it gets- it certainly was for me. I was lucky enough to have a brilliant MW who explained this to me and she told me that if I could handle the pain at that stage, I would be absolutely fine for the rest of it without pain relief. And she was right.

fatsatsuma · 16/02/2011 09:18

I was worried about losing control during transition before my first baby, but in fact it never happened in any of my three labours. As others have said, it was the point at which the contractions were strongest, and the pressure to push (feeling desperate to do a poo - sorry!) became intense.

I worked really hard at keeping my breathing steady throughout and I think that really helped me keep my head together. When the contractions become very painful, your instinct is to tense up and hold your breath. This means you get less oxygen in and CO2 out, and in turn I think this can make the feelings of panic worse, and it becomes a vicious downward spiral.

Maybe I was just lucky during transition, but my advice would be to try to focus on your breathing at that point - and ask your partner/midwife etc to help you. Think long slow gentle breaths out - make the out breath last as long as you can. I also found back massage helpful during every contraction, altho' I know some people hate being touched.

Anyhow, long ramble, but I wanted to encourage you that transition doesn't necessarily mean losing control.

RobynLou · 16/02/2011 09:39

I lost it a bit during transition with both of mine, but despite the primal part of my brain making me go loopy, I was still aware in the little bit of rational brain that was still working that this was transition, and that meant it was all nearly over, and the second time I knew that the pushing bit's a lot better for me than the dilating bit, so I was v glad to be at transition.

ScarlettCrossbones · 16/02/2011 09:42

Panicking/losing control was what I worried about most before I had children, but tbh I didn't notice transition at all during any of my three births. Guess not everyone does - hope that reassures you a bit!

izzybiz · 16/02/2011 09:45

I've gone a bit crazy at transition during all 3 of mine!
With Dc3 Dh and I were alone in the delivery room, things were moving very quickly,one minute I was groaning gently and the next I was climbing up the bed insisting I was going home, I needed a bath, I needed a ceasarean right now, I was dying etc!
I tend to vomit at this point too!

The MW came in took one look at me and said 'I'll just grab the delivery trolley'

Ds2 was born 12 minutes later!

notnowbernard · 16/02/2011 09:47

I 'lost it' during transition with DC2 (not DC1 or 3, interestingly)

But I kept it in my head and didn't verbalise it - I thought if I vocalised my thoughts - "I can't do it, I need a Caesarian, get me out of here" - I'd properly lose it, and it'd all go tits up

IME transition did mean that I was VERY close to pushing - which is a massive relief in itself

I also did the 'look at every Mother on the street and think she did it, and she did it...' etc etc It helped, I think

Millions have done it before and millions will do it after

Good luck!

Bumperlicious · 16/02/2011 09:52

I didn't really recognise transition in either of my labours, but looking back now I did get to the point where I was telling the midwife I was too scared to start pushing because I knew it was going to hurt. She must have recognised that as transition, though I was very calm & rational about it!

SummerRain · 16/02/2011 09:57

I did get panicy during transition.... more so with dd because I wasn't prepared for how intense it would be.... but with her I had the distraction of there being complications and needing to get her out fast so didn't get much chance to panic.

ds1 was more intense but with him i knew it meant i was close (not that the mws believed me!) so I didn't panic as such... just wanted it to be over.

with ds2 i positively enjoyed it... I was overdue, he's been a nice quick labour and I was glad to be at the end of it so quickly

So i suppose my advice is.... just keep telling yourself that the more intense it feels the better as it means you're almost there and you probably won't panic.

eastegg · 16/02/2011 10:08

Try not to think about transition and you may not even notice it. I remember hearing the MW say to DH as I drifted in and out of gas and air woosiness 'this is classic transition behaviour' but I thought really? I didn't feel any different. And I wasn't saying 'I can't go on' I don't think.

ohmeohmy · 16/02/2011 10:10

As some people say not everybody experiences this but it is a natural response caused by certain hormones surging as the birth becomes imminent. THis sets off the expuslive reflexes of the uterus to get the baby down the birth canal. Sarah Buckley writes a lot about the details in her books (She also has a blog) and it is complicated but totally natural. It's like the fight or flight stress response which is why you feel like you want to go and fearful. Reassurance that you already are doing what you think you can't and reminders that it is a positive sign that birth is imminent will get you through. brief your birth companion.

Imnotaslimjim · 16/02/2011 10:17

My transition was very quick but I did lose it completely, I was screaming and yelling at everyone! MW said "shut up and push" so I did and he was delivered in one swift push. You don't know what is going to happen with your own delivery, but worrying about it now really won't help. Just try telling yourself while you're in labour that there is a chance that you might freak out a little but when you do, baby will be here soon. Good luck

Ushy · 16/02/2011 10:24

I had an epidural with my second so I was chatting about which fish and chip shop was best for my OH to go to get his tea :)

BUnderTheBonnet · 16/02/2011 10:26

My transition with DD lasted about 15 seconds. I wailed "I can't do it" at my DH, he got all excited about his "big moment" to be reassuring and calm, but that was it.

I also remember kind of recognising that it was transition in the tiny rational part of my brain, and being quite excited and relieved. So, the fact that you are informed about how you might possibly feel/behave around this time will probably help. Especially if you can prime your DH to "remind" you about transition at the time. Tell him to be ready to duck when you aim a punch at him though...

warthog · 16/02/2011 10:27

didn't notice transition with either of my first two. not thinking about it now either!

you're already forewarned - if you feel you're going a bit funny you know you're at the end. that's got to be a good thing hasn't it?

PukeyMummy · 16/02/2011 10:31

I didn't panic during transition. Instead I went fruit-loopy and started talking drivel. I was looking out of the window and acting like everything was normal, saying how we should get up and go outside as it was such a lovely day. DH says I was hilarious!

I felt like I was drunk or on drugs - couldn't control the crap coming out of my mouth. I wasn't on any drugs though, only G&A!

CalmInsomniac · 16/02/2011 10:31

Transition doesn't have to be about wild screaming.
I used hypnobirthing breathing and at some point said to my birth partner "um, it's getting a bit hard to handle now", so I went and got in the birth pool and started pushing almost straight away.
My birth partner has always laughed at me that that was as stressed as I got!

Bobby99 · 16/02/2011 10:33

I think I shouted lots during transition, but I was high on gas and air at the time and didn't realise it was me who was screaming until the MW appeared and asked if i was ok. Apparently the noises I was making were typical of someone ready to push - mw's can tell an awful lot about your progress from the screams/grunts/bellows you make!

Original poster

cocoachannel · 16/02/2011 10:53

Thank you all! It really is helpful to hear your experiences. I will also get DH to read this so he doesn't freak out too much (he refuses to watch OBEM so no idea what to expect other than what he's heard at antenatal classes).

OP posts:

TheSecondComing · 16/02/2011 11:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

togarama · 16/02/2011 12:52

I haven't watched OBEM but from everything I've read on here it sounds a bit daft. If you want to watch ordinary births without dramatic editing, exaggeration and voiceovers etc.., there's plenty on YouTube. I found these very useful in the run up to DD's birth 2 years ago.

At least transition is (usually) quick. Fruit-loopy and shouty is how I felt rather than panicky.

It was the only bit of labour where the pain was completely beyond my expectations but it was over in 10 mins. I asked for the gas and air at this stage but it was over so quickly that I didn't manage to get any. (We were at home and my MW's bags had got covered up with random towels. It took a good few minutes to find the canister and mouthpiece, put them together and try to explain to me what to do with it as I'm very impractical at the best of times. Then I was ready to push and the G&A was just in the way so I let go of it.)

woopsidaisy · 16/02/2011 14:20

I agree that knowing about it and expecting it is a good thing to have.
I went a bit loopy in transition. But that is the moment where you have to grab hold of the thread of rational thinking in your mind and say "focus!"
Apparently I did this with DS2. Suddenly said,"come on Woopsi. Focus! Focus!" And I did,and he was born in a couple of pushes.
Getting to 10cms is the worst part,by transition,you are home and dry.

Flip

1 2