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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

Herpes....

11 replies

RoaryBear · 08/02/2011 20:34

I am 39 weeks pregnancy with my second child.

My husband has had genital herpes for 6 years. He kindly waited until after we were married to tell me! He says he always knows when he is about to have an outbreak and that he will never pass it on to me. He won't let me mention it to the doctor or midwives as he is too embarassed for it to be on my notes.

I was tested for being a carrier at the start of my pregnancy during a routine blood test and it came back negative.

I would appreciate it if anyone had anymore information on herpes and the dangers of catching it during pregnancy as I don't feel I am able to talk to a medical professional about it. Any advice would be great as I am confused and worried about harming the baby.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

jkklpu · 08/02/2011 20:35

The only issue is if you have an outbreak during childbirth, I think. If you're negative, don't worry.

AlfalfaMum · 08/02/2011 20:43

If I were you I would discuss it privately with a midwife/doctor (whoever you are most comfortable with) without his knowledge. Your baby's safety is obviously more important than his embarrassment. Also, it's not good for you to be worrying about this and they can probably help put you at ease.

HelloMama · 08/02/2011 20:47

The standard advice is to avoid any sexual contact during pregnancy if your blood test did not show any antibodies to herpes. Although the risk is very low, and it is true that the most risky time to pass on herpes is during an attack, (or just before if he gets the signs), there is research to show that you can still shed virus at time of not having an acute outbreak. You would then still be at risk, but without knowing it.

Once thing your partner could do is to take some prophylactic antiviral tablets to reduce his risk of exposure to you, however at your stage in pregnancy it probably isn't worth it, and i would still recommend you avoid any sexual contact anyhow, just to make sure you and baby are absolutely safe.

The good news is that herpes is harmless most of the time, but it is a big problem if you get a FIRST attack during pregnancy because you will have no protection (antibodies) and therefore neither will your baby. This is when it can cause complications and you would need to have a section etc.

The best site to look at is www.herpes.org.uk as it has lots of info for you and your partner. Your local GU clinic (sexual health) would also be happy to see you if you have any further questions, and it is a confidential service, so will not go on any medical records.

Highlandgirl · 08/02/2011 20:48

You have to mention this to your MW now...even if your negative. This is because, very rarely, the virus can be harmful to babies.

Better to be safe than sorry, I'm sure the MW will keep this information off your paper records but will make a note of the computer syster, so DH won't see it.

Original poster

RoaryBear · 08/02/2011 21:53

Thanks for advice, all very helpful

OP posts:

girlynut · 10/02/2011 21:00

I asked my MW about this during my pregnancy and she said unless you actually had sores during the birth which the baby came into contact with, there was no problem.

Justtrying · 27/03/2011 09:13

For those of you with herpes how many had a C section? Mine has just had a flair up 14 years since my first and only attack down below. When tested its HSV1 not that i suppose it matters. I have had the odd coldsore through pregnanacy, now 32 weeks, so I guess some immunity will have passed to baby. Will ring my mw tomorrow and ask but have been worrying all weekend that i might now need a C section and am looking for some reassurance. Thanks

Ineedsomesleep · 27/03/2011 09:26

I've had it for years, had a bf who went on a trip abroad and it was his coming home present.

Had 2 natural deliveries, however I would advise going along to your GUM clinic as soon as you can. I went in early pregnancy with DC1 and they were really good. We talked about my history and they booked me in with a weekly appointment around my due date to check that there were no active sores. Did it with DC2 too and it really worked well.

Would you be able to go to the GUM clinic? To be honest I think it is completely unreasonable for DH to wait until you were married and even more unreasonable to tell you not to discuss it with the MW because he would feel embarrassed. He really needs to get over his feelings and start putting the health of you and the baby first.

BlameItOnTheBogey · 27/03/2011 09:34

Second the advice that you have to tell your m/w about this. As others have said, if you have an outbreak around your due date it can be very, very harmful for the baby. Your Dh need never know you have told the midwife. However embarrassed he might be, he isn't the priority right now, your unborn child is. He'll feel much worse if something happens to the baby.

planetalice · 27/03/2011 14:17

Contracting Herpes for the first time during pregnancy is more dangerous than a normal outbreak and if you have an outbreak at the time of birth they will consider c-section as risk of passing on to baby whilst they are being born, think also some risk to their eyesight with this. I would most definately discuss this with your midwife and get the proper advice you and your baby need - just ask for it to be left off your notes even if you keep it from your DH to keep the peace. Your DH is being a bit short sighted in his being embarrassed of it being mentioned, surely its worse to ignore it and risk harm to your baby. Herpes is very common and anyone who has ever had sex without a condom has put themselves at risk of contracting it - so thats all of us then! :)

Dont panic - but do speak to health professional for all the facts and advice which I imagine will be use condoms until after the birth :) :)

Ineedsomesleep · 27/03/2011 15:28

Roary found this link for you. Maybe you could get your DH to read it and then talk to you about having a chat with the MW. Maybe he just isn't aware that there is a risk to the baby.

Agree with the others though, if you DH is still dead against you talking to the HCPs you need to go behind his back. The health of your unborn baby is more important than his feelings.

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