Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

First time mum needing some honest advice from mums!

47 replies

Vickisbump · 05/02/2011 01:12

Hello everyone, i have a very big concern - it might not seem like such a big deal to most of you and it may be an unusual thing for someone to ask about childbirth, and you will probably laugh and think i am being stupid, but i am worrying myself sick about this.
I have a great phobia of blood. Now i know that childbirth isn't blood free, obviously, but i'm so worried that i am going to be laying in a bath of my own blood. I am so unaware of what goes on at childbirth, i've never planned on having children (untill i met my partner :) ) but i have been doing loads of research and getting advice from my sisters who have 4 kids between them. I recently was made aware about the after birth and after googling this and coming across a very distressing photo with so much blood i have gotten myself into such a state and a panic. I have about 5 months to go and do not want to spend them stressing and worrying over this as i know it's not good for my baby.
My sisters told me it's not going to be a blood bath, but i can't help but think they are only saying this to calm me as they know my fear of blood. I would rather be advised honestly so i know what i am going to be in for and can try to deal with this. I'm honestly not worried about the pain, it's just the blood part! Aaaah!
Can anyone give me an honest answer about the amount of blood that i will have to see? If any?
I feel so silly posting something like this , but i dont want to be stressing and harming my baby.
Any advice anyone? Please?
Did anyone else have this concern?

Thank you soo much for any advice xxx

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

clouiseg · 05/02/2011 19:42

After 3 DDs, a ventouse, episiotomy and a C Section I can honestly say I never saw any blood. And I had BIG babies with them delivered straight onto me! All I remember seeing is my baby! During labour your focus will probably shift to dealing with that and then your baby arriving! As long as you and OH ensure that all professionals inolved in your care are made aware of your phobia they will do all they can.

Please try to relax about it and enjoy your pregnancy. All the best!

thisisyesterday · 05/02/2011 19:52

my first labour I had a pph and there waas a LOT of blood. well, so I am told. I was lying down and didn't see any of it

with my second, I gave birth at home, kneeling forward over the sofa.
After ds2 was born I turned around to cuddle him and tbh there was a fair amount of blood and other manky stuff all over the place, although the midwives cleared it all up really quickly.

with ds3 I had another homebirth, this time I was in the pool and after he was born the water did all turn rather red

But you know, I am guessing that even if you do happen to bleed a lot (and you might not) and even if you do see it (which you might not) then the fact that you're cuddling your brand new baby will mean that you aren't really taking much notice of the blood!

you can inform the midwives who are with you anyway and then perhaps they can make sure it's all cleaned up as quick as possible?

SummerRain · 05/02/2011 19:59

I hemorrhaged with my first so there was lots of blood (apparently there was blood in my waters when they broke them too although i didn't see that)

with ds1 I bled a lot after but there wasn't much during the birth.

with ds2 i had a gush of blood prior to the waters breaking, a good bit of blood during the birth... some of which ended up in my baby's lungs which had him in SCBU for a week during which time he vomited blood and had to have many many arduous blood tests.

If I had a blood phobia I think I'd prepare for the worst (blood bath) and attempt to get some counselling/behaviour therapy whilst pregnant so as to cope better in a worst case scenario.

Also, when people mention heavy period it really is a bit of an understatement in some cases... I had blood pouring out of me very heavily for the first week or so after all three of them.

CrispyCakeHead · 05/02/2011 20:03

I had a forceps delivery with DS2 and had an episiotomy; although I apparently lost a lot of blood (borderline whether they were going to do a transfusion) I didn't see any of it. His head was quite bloodied, but he was plopped straight onto me. If you are concerned about that aspect of it, you can ask the MWs to clean your baby off before being presented to you.

Good Luck

coldtits · 05/02/2011 20:03

It's not even real blood, it's mor like period blood than anything else.

thumbdabwitch · 05/02/2011 20:06

I spent a lot of time on the loo in labour - my waters went down the loo and that involved a fair amount of blood, but it was all in the loo so not too scary.

I actually gave birth lying on my left side for 98% of it - it was only the final push where I was on my back with legs in the air so the MW could get to the baby and make sure he was ok. I knew something was coming out with each push, but I didn't see it - I mostly had my eyes shut and was semicomatose between contractions anyway - I didn't even see it after DS was born, and they cleaned him up for me before they gave him to me (I had specifically stated that in my birth plan but they did it anyway). My nightie was a mess but it all soaked out (cheers MIL! :)) and I can honestly say I didn't see any of the blood at all on the bed.

It's all a bit of a blur, what happened straight after the birth - but I know they came and changed my bedlinen (I wasn't in the delivery suite, I was in the [haha] Observation Room so on a proper hospital bed) and cleaned me up - I just don't quite remember how they achieved it!

Just a thought - I had terrible Birth Fear before having my DS so I saw a hypnobirthing person for it - made an enormous difference. Didn't result in a "no pain" birth, but it did get rid of the fear and gave me confidence to let my bod just get on with it. Might help with your blood phobia?

Grumpla · 05/02/2011 20:09

I lost very little blood, mainly a bit of a splat at the moment DS emerged, and the midwives had it all whisked away before I knew what was going on. They are well prepared for cleaning up the mess - they don't want blood everywhere any more than you do - mine had a big stack of absorbent mat things to clean up / catch with.

Afterwards was like the heaviest day of my period for about a week. I showered two or three times a day with help from DH (and without looking at what was going down the drain) and that helped.

I delivered my placenta (afterbirth) into the loo, if you do this then you don't have to look at it!

I had a homebirth and my cream carpets were TOTALLY UNSULLIED by the whole experience, if that makes you feel any better :)

sheeplikessleep · 05/02/2011 20:26

Agree that the lochia was the 'worst' bit of the blood. The shower straight after the birth was quite 'bloody', due to the lochia, the water making it look worse, but also seeing bits of blood wipes on me as I showered I found a bit yuk. But I don't actually remember seeing blood during the birth.

Apparently, when my Dad came in after the birth (in the delivery room), he spotted a blood ridden sheet underneath the bed. I didn't even realise it was there. I didn't hear him say it. I was totally just awestruck by my new baby.

I appreciate you might notice blood more because of your phobia, BUT, let your MW know and just try and focus on something else (am sure the contractions will help with distracting you!), look at a picture on the wall or something. I had a bit of a funny thing about the placenta, freaks me out a bit, but I didn't even see it. Maybe try hypnotherapy / closing your eyes to relax you, envisage a quiet place.

Not sure if this helps or not.

thumbdabwitch · 05/02/2011 20:29

Forgot to mention in my post that I didn't see the placenta at all either - that was delivered with the next contraction after DS, put in a kidneybasin and removed from view very fast (I really didn't want to see that bit either).

hormonesnomore · 05/02/2011 20:32

I've had 3 babies and can honestly say I didn't see a drop of blood (lost over a litre with DC3 apparently & wondered how on earth they measure it?) - didn't see my placentas either, and I wanted to!

I think, like most women, you will be so busy gazing at your gorgeous newborn and being thankful all the pain is over you probably won't notice anything gory. The midwives clean up very quickly anyway.

I'd definitely recommend hypnosis/relaxation classes - preparation will increase your confidence.

mungogerry · 05/02/2011 21:31

Hi,

I have 4 children, eldest is six, so not too distant memories of births.

I never saw any blood at all. Not one drop.

I had water births, there were a few bits of white vernix in the pool, but no blood. I am severely needle phobic (I pass out) and am not wonderful with blood either.I would highly recommend looking into using a pool for you. It also means baby has no blood on them when you hold them in the water :-)

As said, afterwards is like a heavy period.

You may want it added to your notes that you do not wish to see your placenta. It's not bloody - but it is like a big blob of raw liver - so have a think about that one too.

Good luck, and do look into water births?

StantonLacy · 05/02/2011 21:38

I didn't see any blood with DS, but quite a bit with DD. Reason being, I gave birth to DD on all fours (which was a fantastic position for labour and delivery btw, agree with previous poster about it) and the majority of the blood ended up all over my calves and feet. It was only when the midwives put my feet in the stirrups to do my stitches that I caught sight of them - it was a bit of a shock to be honest.
So maybe you could ask your DH to have some baby wipes to hand if you think it would distress you ? That way, he could do a quick clean up job before you get chance to look - you'll obviously be too busy with the beautiful baby you have just produced !
Agree that the lochia can sometimes be very heavy (almost 'flooding', if you've ever had any really, really heavy periods like that), but luckily maternity pads are nice and thick.
Best of luck

undercovamutha · 05/02/2011 21:39

Very little blood with DC1 - the pool went a bit pinky, but certainly not bright red.

Lots of blood prior to placenta delivery with DC2 - but I didn't really see much of it, and was remarkably calm about the whole thing. DH however (who is VERY crap with blood) went quite green!

Some blood afterwards - but only like a bad period IMO.

Please don't worry. You will be the right 'end' to not have to see the blood IYSWIM - as long as the MW and your DH can take the sight, you should be ok!!! I'm sure if you explain your phobia to the MW's they will support you and clean up any blood asap.

adcd · 07/02/2011 12:26

My experience is exactly the same as MoonUnitAlpha. Don't worry - i didn't see any bloody at all!

flootshoot · 07/02/2011 12:33

Could you put it into your birth plan that you don't want to see the 'business end' while pushing and that you'd like the baby dried before holding him/her.

I'm sure if you make the midwives aware of your fears they will do their best to accomodate it and avoid you seeing anything that might frighten you.

LuckyC · 07/02/2011 13:07

Agree with everyone who has said focus was on baby. I apparently lost a lot of blood but by that stage was so doolally and so utterly surprised that THERE WAS REALLY A BABY IN THERE ALL ALONG A PROPER BABY REALLY ACTUALLY that I did not see a single drop of any of it.

Very easy to shield yourself from any blood during the birth and in the immediate aftermath - a couple of sheets draped by a midwife should do it. The rest is genuinely just heavy period-esque.

Backinthebox · 07/02/2011 14:23

Ah, if there is one thing that unites everyone on MN it's talk of bodily fluids of one kind or another. That and poo .

The posters who have said prepare for anything have it right. Make sure the MWs know you have a phobia of blood, and make sure OH tells any new MWs who take over a shift.

A pool is a good idea, but don't rely on it. You can plan it all you like, but it doesn't always work. Me and best friend have planned 3 water births between us, and what we actually got was a CS, a hospital fully medicalised induction and an unexpected home birth.

Wrt people mentioning canulas, it's probably worth having it in your notes and being aware of the fact that you don't have to have one as routine. Many hospitals put one in 'just in case.' They won't elaborate any further than that. What they do it for is just in case you need one and they didn't put one in soon enough and your veins are difficult to find. I asked for my last birth if they could monitor me enough that they could tell if I needed one in good time rather than just bunging one in because that's what they do.

You could ask the MW to discretely wipe your baby and you while you are having your first hugs. FWIW both of my babies were born with buckets of blood, in 2 different ways (I had the CS and the HB.) I just bleed a lot. I had photos of both of my babies first minute in this world, and in both photos there is a lot of blood. A LOT! But I didn't really notice it until I saw the photos. In the photos taken at 4 minutes, the blood was gone. A tip for if there is any blood in the photos, so that you don't have to not look at what might be very precious photos, is to have someone crop them and turn them black and white to minimize the amount of red in them.

lucielooo · 07/02/2011 17:20

Wow... I don't have a phobia of blood but I've found this thread really reassuring! I think I was expecting a bit of a bloodbath :)

thumbdabwitch · 08/02/2011 03:58

Just wanted to say that what might look like a lot of blood (even though you probably won't see it) may not be - it has pretty low surface tension so even a spoonful scatters enough to look like a major arterial spurt.

matana · 09/02/2011 16:11

I personally was too much in the 'zone' and high on gas and air to really notice much to be honest. I think your mind will be taken off it purely by the process of pushing baby out!! I did notice it afterwards though when they stitched me and i got in the shower. But by the time that happens you'll have your new baby in your arms to take your mind off it

piper2011 · 10/02/2011 21:42

hi i have 2 beautiful children already but they were both by c-section me and my partner are planning another baby in 2012 when my implant come out i was wondering if after 2 c-sections i could have a VBAC. im worried because i would like a VBAC but i was told that after 2 c-sections i would have to have another c-section then after that my womb would be taken out at the same time. is this true as im only 21 and would like more than 2 children am i worrying over nothing???

suwoo · 11/02/2011 06:53

Ha ha! Seriously, your womb taken out? I dont think so. What about Victoria Beckham, she will be having her 4th section (I would suggest). Of course you can have a VBAC, they will just monitor you more closely in case of rupture.

This is a thread about blood loss though, maybe you should start your own thread and detail your concerns there.

Flip

1 2