First-timer considering home birth...advice please!

[crazybutterflylady]

Hi

I have just moved to a new area and have a choice of a few hospitals... however I had a meeting with my midwife this week and she suggested a home birth. Mainly, I think, because I have expressed an interest in a water birth and the hospitals near me can't guarantee it.

I would really appreciate some advice/opinions to help me decide... thanks in advance.

I did it with my first (he's 3 months now). It was fab! DH was dubious at first, but now tells everyone how great home births are!

I would recommend having a doula though. We had a student. It meant there was someone else to deal with phoning midwives, helping them set up etc, and DH and I could devote all of our attention to, well, me. :o

Hi flingon, thanks for the reply. DH is very dubious too. I won't go for it unless he is happy, but I have heard so many awful stories of partners being chucked out of warsd etc at the end of visiting hours which would really stress me out if I was feeling at all nervous when the time comes (due in May). I think it would be lovely to be left to ourselves a few hours after the birth, to enjoy being a little family immediately and not have to wait to be discharged.

Eeveryone I have mentioned a HB to has said 'oh god what if something goes wrong'... but surely it won't be a problem and we could get transferred if necessary?

Crazy if your just thinking about it i would suggesting going to a few talks about Homebirth.
NCT run a free Homebirth session in my area so check with them.

My hosptial ran Homebirth a homebirth session so check with them.

Also do have a look on homebirth.org which has so much information on it.
there is also a thread on here called "is there a homebirth thread"
I'm planning a homebirth and have attending 3 homebirths myself so feel excited but I do think that as with any birth choice it's important to read up and discuss so you and your partner feel comfatable
eg one of the things i was concerned about is which hosptial i would be taken to as the one I'm registered at is quite far. If it's just i've had enough and want some stronger pain relief i go to the registered hospital if there is soemthing urgent/emergency then i would go to the closest.

I had a homebirth with my first 2 years ago and I would thoroughly recommend it (assuming there are no medical reasons why it wouldn't be ideal).

I knew from very early in my pregnancy that I didn't want a medicalised birth. DP was fully supportive from day 1.

I didn't attend any classes or talks, just read and read and read!

Ina May's Guide to Childbirth is a fantastic book as is this one by Nicky Wesson. Reading those 2 books cemented my decision.

I had a birth pool and spent most of my labour in it but couldn't find a great 'pushing' position so moved to my sofa for the last stage and that's where dd was born!

I had 2 amazing, very experienced midwives who took great care of me, dd and DP!

Go for it!

There is a lovely HB thread - sorry can't link it as on my phone - but do a search. lots of support.
I've had 3 of my 4 at home. DH feels far more useful at home, with a greater sense of control. Ok it might be a simple as knowing where the cups are to make the tea, but the familiarity all helps.
Had I not had my very experienced friends with me in hospital I would have fallen in with hospital protocol (intervention after 2 hours of pushin) which was not necessary for ME. At home MWs want to intervene as little as possible, you get two to care for you throughout, and they are experienced. They bring all the kit, including resucitator.

I also believe that it not only improves your birthing experience, but aids recovery and breastfeeding.

if we had had a big enough flat i would have thought about a home birth for dc1. our's is too small so we booked into the mw led centre at our hospital. i was massively prepared for water birth with relaxation and visualisation. I am SO PLEASED I did not go for a home birth as I had a horrendous time and ended up having an epidural. I think I was unlucky (got horribly and excruciatingly stuck at 5 cm bouncing straight from one hideous contraction straight into the next). OK if I had been at home I would have been transferred to the hospital and would have got the epidural. But that transfer time and the journey would have been awful. As it was I was whisked upstairs to the labour ward with the anaesthetist ready and waiting for me. It only took 5 minutes, but that still seemed like an eternity. I think HBs are fab for those for whom they work. And I don't want to say negative things about them. As I say, I was unlucky. But that's my experience - for my birth it would have been awful. Good luck.

A couple of my friends have had fantastic homebirths and I think they are wonderful if there is no particular medical reason which would mean it would be advisable to be in hospital. However, if I was advising a friend (and please understand this is only my opinion and I am not medically trained!) I would suggest having the first in hospital and then perhaps HBs for subsequent pregnancies. I say this because I had a significant bleed (PPH) following the birth of DC1, and was so glad I didn't need to be transferred and it could be controlled immediately. Having said that no one else I know from NCT had a PPH and it only affects a small percentage of labours, so odds on you will be fine. Whatever choice you make will be right for you and that is the most important thing, and you can always be transferred - a friend was transferred when she couldn't cope with the pain anymore and ended up with a good hospital birth and plans a HB next time.

I had a homebirth with DD (first and only baby so far) and would thoroughly recommend it to other low-risk mothers.

This decision was based on reviewing facts and figures for positive and negative birth outcomes at home or in hospital. It was an area I'd been interested in for a long time after coming across it while studying history of science and medicine as an undergrad.

The evidence indicated to me that as a low-risk mother I had a better chance of having a straightforward birth and avoiding physical or psychological trauma to me or baby if I gave birth at home. The risks to the life of the baby were the same as for hospital births. Risks for tearing, episiotomy, PND, PPH, difficulty establishing breastfeeding etc.. were all higher in hospital than at home.

DD's birth was straightforward and manageable with minimal bleeding and no tearing or afterpains. We went to bed for 8 hours after the birth, got up in the morning and I felt brilliant.

For low-risk pregnancies, I'd choose HB every time.

im pg with DC1 and am fully intent on having a homebirth

midwife says that so long as i have an uncomplicated pregnancy its fine but they wont make the decision until 34 weeks.

intend to have a birthing pool and want to hypobirth as well

we live in the sticks so not exactly near the hospital though i guess i could be blue lighted to our nearest hospital in 15 mins... though i dont think thats the hospital to go to for problem babies as if you choose to give birth in the birthing unit based there and have problems you are taken to the next hospital.

i guess id be a good 25ish mins from that hospital, even by blue lights, so as much as i really WANT to do it, i wont be doing it if it looks like i may have complications

I have had 2 homebirths and and planning another one with my DC3. They were a bit funny the first time as it was my first birth, but I stuck to my guns and it was a wonderful experience both times round. In fact the same midwife was on duty and delivered both my babies (19 mths apart!) Hoping for a hat-trick!

I didn't want a lot of medical intervention and know that I have a high pain threshold. I was prepared to go to hospital if I needed to which reassured the midwives etc and we only lived down the road from the hospital anyway.

I had my shiatsu practitioner there both times (like accupressure massage) and she was fantastic. I had a back labour (agonising) with DD and the midwife said afterwards that she had never attended a back to back labour where the mum hadn't ended up with an epidural or C-Section, so it really worked for me. Other than that I just concentrated on my breathing and that got me through.

I spent almost all of both labours on my knees facing the couch with my arms and upper body resting on the sofa, and only stood up to push them out.

Brilliant experiences both time and hoping all will go well this time too. Good luck with whatever you decide.

Thanks everyone. The more I read about it the more I think I would like one. My concerns are around (duh) how much it will hurt - I've never really had a huge experience of pain, so I have no idea of my threshold. At the moment I am not keen on the thought of the drugs because I hate that woozy/sick feeling. I've had morphine once before and vowed never agin. Likewise, I'm not keen on the idea of an epidural because I really want to feel what I'm doing. But as I say I have no experience of any of this so who knows what will happen once labour starts.

Oh and the fact that our sofa is cream and all you sofa birthers are terrifying the life out of me

I do really like the idea that you have one on one care from a midwife, since some of the things I've read/heard are about not getting enough attention and not knowing when to push or not.

Hmmm... a big decision. I'll talk to my midwife at the next appointment and get some more information I think. Thanks for all your replies, I really appreciate it.

Oh... the other thing I see as positive is the lower chance of induction/episiotomy. From what I can make out, you get certain MWs that hurry things along just to get it going and move you out of the birthing room (to put it harshly... sorry!). At home I guess there is less intervention as a few of you have mentioned. togarama I was really interested in your post, it agrees with my thinking!

nannyl I hope you manage to get your homebirth!

Thanks again.

I had my first at home and I'd say "do it"! Obviously all the usual caveats apply - low risk and supportive OH are essential, but if you have a choice I thoroughly recommend it.

The good websites, threads and books have already been recommended.

I considered a homebirth with my DS (who is my only child... so far) but changed my mind as I started panicking about possible problems. I know the risk is minimal, but it is still there.

As it turned out, I had a quick but very painful labour, and just about managed to have an epidural in time at the hospital!

I would say book for a homebirth if that is what you want, and if it all works out - great. If you go into labour and can't cope / need more pain relief, you can always just turn up at the hospital. Whereas it's a lot harder to plan to go into hospital and then decide to stay at home, and they can get really funny about sending a midwife out to you with no notice.

"low risk and supportive OH are essential"

Women who are not 'low risk' (myself included) would argue that this is not always the case. Independent midwives in this country deliver many babies at home to mothers who've been deemed 'high risk', generally with excellent outcomes.

It really is down to the individual - every case is unique.

OP - if you or your DP need reassurance your midwife will give it to you in bucketfuls (assuming that she's the one who suggested it in the first place!)

I had an incredibly easy pregnancy and am fit and healthy. I would have been an ideal candidate for a homebirth and did consider it. In the end I decided as it was my first child and had no idea what labour would be like I would prefer a hospital birth, but at a midwifery-led unit rather than under consultant care. In the end this was the best decision - DS presented in labour with shoulder dystocia (his shoulder was stuck behind my pelvis). My labour was progressing completely normally up until the point at which the head was out, and then it all went wrong and the midwife had literally 5 minutes to get him out as the cord was compressed - 5 minutes later he would have been dead. I ended up with loads of midwives and a doctor in the room to get him out. Had I had a homebirth, with one or two midwives present, I would have ended up with a dead baby. There wouldn't have been enough time to transfer me to hospital as the problem only emerged right at the end of labour and as noted there was then hardly any time to get him out. It's impossible to predict these things in advance, and as I said I had had no problems in pregnancy or the early stages of labour at all. I know they say "we will transfer you to hospital if there is a problem" - but in my case that still would have happened too late.

Problems in labour like mine are rare, but they happen. Being a low-risk mother doesn't mean that they won't happen to you; honestly, I had the healthiest pregnancy of anyone I know - I sailed through it. I am told that in future pregnancies I will be considered high risk for complication and monitored by a consultant. I don't want to scare you, but my experience has completely put me off homebirths - a shame, as before having DS my thoughts were that I would like to have number 2 at home, which is never going to happen now. There's a lot to think about when making this decision.

Hello there!

Come and join us over here

There are lots of us having hbs, including first timers like me!

I'd second the books recommended by BunnyLeBowski and suggest you have a look to see if there are any Homebirth support groups where you live. I'm planning a homebirth for my second and planned one for my first but needed (???) to be induced - my local group hires out a birthpool free of charge and it's been great to be able to meet-up with other mothers who have had or are aplnning homebirths, as well as meet with doulas & independant midwifes for their advice & ideas.

If you're worried about pain management then definitely think about doing a Hypnobirthing course.

Unless you're nearing 36 week there's no rush to make a decision and if you opt for a homebirth you can always change your mind at the last minute.

Ultimately you need to make the right choice for you and your family....there are many scare-stories out there which are out-numbered by the tales of positive and empowering births, both at home and in hospital.

Whatever you decide, good luck

Shoulder dystocia is extremely dangerous. However, midwives are trained to deal with it quickly and competently at homebirths. Having attendents with sufficient experience and sense to recognise the problem and act immediately with the right manoeuvres is key whether you're at home or in hospital. I don't recall that outcomes for shoulder dystocia differ significantly between home and hospital births. (Am typing quickly on the train by phone - excuse any typos.)

I planned a HB with my first (and so far only). Remember you can change your mind even when you are in labour, so if you find you are not coping you can transfer. In the end I went into the hospital due to a prolonged second stage but it wasn't a drama (except the midwives forget my notes). Check out the homebirth website, there's lots of good information there.

Someone upthread mentioned that "they won't make a decision until I'm 34 weeks" - it's YOUR decision, not the MW. Listen to their advice but it's up to you.

"Had I had a homebirth, with one or two midwives present, I would have ended up with a dead baby"

I had two midwives present at my homebirth, who resolved my baby's shoulder dystocia quickly and quietly. And that was with an 11lb baby.

I know at least 3 other women who've had s/d occur at their homebirths and in every case it's been dealt with effectively. Including a very overweight mum who had just one midwife present (midwife was also in her early 60's, but obviously very strong and fit - she hurled mother on to her back and into MacRoberts. Baby flew out!)

The real risks for S/D are induction and epidural, but you don't hear a lot of voices discouraging them.

"Problems in labour like mine are rare, but they happen. Being a low-risk mother doesn't mean that they won't happen to you"

This is true. Really dire obstetric emergencies like cord prolapse, severe haemorrhage, major placental abruption and severe s/d would probably have a worse outcome if the mother was at home and not able to immediately access paediatric and obstetric care.

But there are 1000's of homebirths a year in the UK and over-all the outcomes are similar to those of low risk women giving birth in hospital.

This must mean that there are instances where mothers and babies are experiencing severe difficulties during birth caused by being in hospital.

If this wasn't the case you'd expect to see a significantly higher rate of neonatal deaths and injuries associated with homebirth. And of course you don't.

Hello!I planned a home birth as I thought I would be inhibited by medicalisation etc etc - but I ended up with some sort of reverse psychology and lost my nerve - went to hospital and then went like a train.

The reason being I didn't have true support from my DH so basically at home I was labouring alone and that's not easy - you need genuine, empathetic support.

For me the whole experience depended on your birth partner(s) - I found birth really winkled into the heart of our relationship. As other posters have suggested, consider a doula - I think there is a reason why it's traitional in most cultures for women to give birth surrounded by experienced women - because ( as a generalisation) that's how you will feel safest and most supported.

Well said cleofartra! I feel lucky to be living in a country where we have relatively good health care and hospitals but it is a woman's decision to choose where she gives birth.
My mw is incredibly supportive of hbs in general and she said that the risk of infection is markedly lower if you give birth at home which isn't something you hear about. She also pointed out that in serious cases where baby gets stuck it doesn't make any difference where you are.
I think we're about to see the rates of hbs go up as hospitals get closed and infection rates rise. I hope it becomes less controversial as I had a lot of negative responses from my family when I first said it was what I wanted.