Could you give me your opinions? My reasons for wanting another c-section.

[flootshoot]

Am deciding between VBAC and c-section this time after emcs last time ? I am seeing the consultant next week and would really like to come out of that meeting with a plan! Apologies as this is long?.

Last time I had a back labour and failure to progress past 9cm, DS went into distress and emcs was the outcome. The experience itself could have been a lot worse ? staff were lovely and very supportive and clear about what was happening ? however in hindsight it was quite traumatic and it did affect my bonding with DS. I had a debrief when he was 5 months old which really helped me to feel better about the whole thing. I also saw a supervisor of midwives just before Christmas from the ?normalising birth? team.

I?ve thought long and hard about what I want to do this time and I think I?ve come to a decision and would really welcome opinions as to whether this sounds like a reasoned case for having another c-section. Basically I want to know if there?s anything I?ve missed that the consultant might mention!

1. Physically I?m told there is no reason not to try for a VBAC ? however there is no guarantee this will work out for me, and TBH another labour followed by emcs would be something that I would find very traumatic ? I don?t want to stick a spanner in the works of bonding with this baby.

2. Recovery from a c-section - I have done it before and it doesn?t phase me. I healed extremely quickly last time and while I know this won?t necessarily be the same this time, I think I can cope with it ? plus there is no guarantee that a VBAC won?t result in stitches ? in fact a couple of my friends took longer to recover from their vaginal deliveries that I did from my c-section (in terms of pain/discomfort) so I know there are no guarantees recovery will be easier.

3. Mentally I?ve just got a total block about being ?able? to give birth naturally. I know in all likelihood I can do it. I know everyone else will say I can do it ? but having ?failed? before it feels like an impossible task ? on a par with being asked to just go and run a marathon. For this reason I feel like I won?t accomplish a VBAC purely because if it?s mind over matter, my mind just isn?t in the right place. And I genuinely don?t think I?ve got time to turn that around in two months. I?ve spoken to people, both on here and in RL, discussed with HCP, done loads of research and read lots of books/websites and it doesn?t make me feel any more determined that I can do it.

4. Lastly, and this is probably the most trivial reason ? I simply don?t want to go through labour again. I?ve been having Braxton Hicks which haven?t been anything more than uncomfortable but it?s brought it all flooding back! I would like a nice, calm experience, and I don?t care if it?s clinical. I?m not bothered about having a natural birth experience and I won?t beat myself up for not trying it. I will, however, be extremely upset if I end up with a similar situation to what happened with DS.

Does that sound reasonable? I think I?ve covered all bases, considered everything and come to the right decision for me.

Thanks if you?ve got this far?.!

Sound very reasonable to me & a C section a good decision.

"TBH another labour followed by emcs would be something that I would find very traumatic"

I think this is reason enough.

Having a vb is not the holy grail, having a baby is.

[have had vb & elcs]

Agree with Soupy.

FWIW, I was the complete opposite to you - DD1 was an em c-s under GA following failure to progress (having got to 9cm). I was desperate to have a VBAC and my hospital was very supportive of this. BUT they would also have been supportive of an ELCS if that was what I felt was right for me.

Good luck!

It sounds like you've put a great deal of thought into it, and your reasons are good- especially 1 and 3.

Good luck.

Agree with what's said so far, but just to be devil's advocate - if you labour it is more likely than not that you will have a much, much better experience than you did first time, whether you are able to push your baby out or not. I've never forgotten a midwife saying to me: "second babies are beautiful babies to birth" when I was bricking myself at the thought of it after a difficult first labour and forceps delivery. You got to 9 cm. That means this time around almost all your labour will be like that of a second time mum - shorter and sweeter!

Have to say - I'm impressed by the sound of your hospital. A 'normalising birth' team? Wow! Have you had a chance to talk to a midwife who specialises in VBAC? They must be dealing with fears like yours all the time. It would be really interesting to know what her view would be, what safeguards she might suggest if you did change your mind and go for a VBAC, things that would make you feel as if you had more control over the situation.

Cleofartra, when I had DD2, the consultant told me I should consider this as a 'first' birth, even though I had got to 9cm, as there had been no pushing and DD1 had not descended into the birth canal.

I hope you aren't living in our current area! Not because I'm mean, but because I had a near-identical experience with my first child when we lived in Bucks(5yrs ago). My experience on the ward afterwards was hellish (to be brief) and since then I have panic attacks if I need to go to hospital. I get nightmares beforehand if I know I'll have to stay in for an operation.

DS was born just a couple of weeks ago and had several complications, which were known about months before his birth. My consultant out and out refused to refer me for an ELCS despite for us it was the only way we would get to have some time with DS alive. He not only insisted a VBAC was the only way to go (despite my being terrified and having constant nightmares & panic attacks about it) - he also insisted there was no point referring me to a colleague as they would just agree with him.

If you have an unsympathetic consultant like I did, DO ask for a second opinion. Eventually I did and the second consultant was lovely - she not only referred me for an ELCS, she did not make me argue - just wanted to make sure I fully understood any the risks. Interesting how any risks of VBAC were not mentioned at all by either consultant - maybe they're smaller?

There are two website that are worth googling. One is called something like caesareans.org and talks about ELCS and VBAC. There is another one about VBAC too, PM me if can't find it online and I'll try to find it again. There was quite a bit of good information on the RCOG website too.

Thanks everyone.

KarenHL - what an awful experience for you - I know someone else whose consultant refused her an elcs and (for other, many reasons) he was struck off!!

The hospital have been very open with me and made it very clear that it's my decision, although they are very pro-VBAC so I may have some opposition when I actually tell them my decision! The thing is, while VBAC is the right decision for lots of women, I don't feel like it is for me.

I think I will print off my OP and take it with me.