Scared of giving birth!!!

[Paula30CWR]

Hi,

I'm 34 weeks pregnant and I'm due to give birth at the end of Feb in Kings College Hospital.

I think I am quite ready for this as I have read a lot in between my work breaks and I have bought all the necessary things to be prepared for the hospital and when my baby arrives (the first one).

However, silly me, I turned the TV last night to watch some random programs and I ended up watching 'Chanel 4 - One baby born every minute'. I don't know if they choose these women to film their experiences but she screamed of pain, had no position in bed, moved around like as if she didn't find any comfort. Her partner was with her and she was inhaling gas as a sort of pain relief. However, her screams were freaky.
It was silly of me. My husband just watch the news after work and we immediately watch a DVD like 24, Lost, Fringe...but I don't know why I watched a bit of this program.
I'm not going to say giving birth doesn't scare me, but after watching just 10 mins of that program made me wonder if I will cope with it.
My husband says: 'Look, I support you in every decision you make because you will feel the pain. You have the control of it and if you think the pain is too much for you to handle and you need the epidural - despite you want to control the pain - ask for it babe'. I will try to avoid it but I will consider it as well.

My point is, is anyone scared about it?
I'm getting closer to the date and I just try to concentrate in doing my job but I can't!!!!!!

Please let me know what your experiences are.

Anyway, I'm based in SE London - Dulwich. So, if anyone wants to go for a coffee, please let me know. I work from home.

Thanks!

Paula

Hiya Paula I had DC1, a little girl, 6 weeks today. Just wanted to quickly say (as she is lying on my lap!) that although it was loongg, and yes, it was painful, it was the most brilliant experience of my life. So exciting, and I was so scared leading up to it after all the horror stories people told me but I had a lovely midwife and had a very straightforward delivery with no tears/stitches. I kept myself fit and active, ate relatively well and did the pelvic floor exercises beforehand (I know I also had a bit of luck as baby was previously OP and turned).

However, most importantly I think to me I didn't panic when it came to it and I had a lovely 'team' in DP and mum. I'm not saying if you have/do all these things it will end up like this but I'm sure it helps.

Not everyone has horrific births! It's a shame that it's only those ones that we seem to hear about on MN :(

Yeah.

Anyone who's actually experienced birth will note the huge difference between the real deal and that on the silver screen. Even so called documentries really do leave a lot to be desired.

However. Fear of the unknown is totally normal, so don't panic about being aprehensive!

The great thing about labour, as a couple of posters prior to this one mentioned, is that it starts off (usually) real slow and gentle, to get you used to it very gradually. And it's got lovely resting gaps between each rush. Towards the end, when tired enough, I could literally fall asleep in these few mins- a complete godsend. No other pain is so forgiving or ulitimately, rewarding too!

My best tip that I read in one book and found definitely working on the day, is making your mouth, jaw and lips relax. It's impossible for your cervix to remain tense if your mouth's relaxed and the contractions will do their job quicker and more efficiently (apparently).

Good luck and enjoy whatever birth you have!

Thank you all for being so supportive!!!

I guess I gets terrified of the unkown but it'll be fine. I'm 34 weeks now and I have started having distanced contractions once a day. I will get used to them and hopefully everything will be ok.

Thank you all.

Paula

A massive fact, which doesn't get mentioned, and would have helped me alot actually, is that it desn't hurt when you are at the third stge. Well, not for me. As soon as i started pushing with the contractions in the end it didn't hurt at all! You kind of push against them. Maybe i am magical! Does anyone else agree?

I could deal with the contractions if someone could say ''right, madam. You have exactly 327 contractions and 2 hrs 29 minutes left to go until you need to push'' lol :o

The best description i have ever heard is that it's like mixing batter but not being able to quit.

Best tip i have: get a packet of flour and some water and mix it up thick, then, when you feel like your wrist is hurting and you want to stop-Don't. Just keep carrying on for an extra 20 seconds then slow down to a stop. That's what a contraction is like.

Oh my god, i have just caught up with 1BEM on 4.com and seriously, you don't need to worry. Paula, like i said before, i am at that 'oh shit-not long now' phase and had a terrible time with my other 2, but it is nothing like the way she made out. I am with MMaGNT with the 'ridiculous fuss' comment. I am not surprised that you are anxious! That episode should have carried a warning lol

On the plus side, if you expect it to be that bad you will probably sail through it. I just said to my mates-if she had shut up and stayed focused for a minute she wouldn't have been so tense (therefore doubling her pain) and all that energy could've been saved for the big push. They should've given the poor girl an epidural ages before they did. DO NOT let this put you off-it's really bad, i wont lie, but i have never seen anything like that before. And i am 'Mrs Epidural'!

Thanks a lot Miacat!

You made me laugh!!! To be honest, i completely forgot about that woman. I received so many messages, it kind of went away. And after all...there will be pain and I will deal with it.

Right now, I'm thinking about pain relief options like the tens machine as I don't have a bath tub and I only have a shower. I have noticed the few contractions I have had, faded away when I got into the shower. However, if I'm standing it get s worse. So, I need to consider other options. So I will think about hiring a Tens machine. And yes, I might be Mrs Epidural as well. But it'll be decided that day as I need to see what it feels like.

Thanks a lot for your comments. It helped a lot!

I'll stop working for a bit now to go and sit in the yoga ball to make this baby turn as i'm almost 35 weeks pregnant and I think he's very comfortable where he is.

ANyway, thanks again!

Paula

Its not 'magic' its horrible and painful. Really painful but like some one said endorphins kick in, its handle able but still very unpleasant. I think the trick is not to give your self a hard time, If you don't follow your birth plan exactly it doesn't matter. Remember you have never done it before and so done give your self a hard time. Utilize any thing you think will make it easier and done write anything off!

@popthatmumma perhaps you could stop reviving all these zombie threads about birth fears?