natural or c-section?

[PrincessScrumpy]

Won't bore you with full story but ended up with 2nd degree tears. I know this isn't bad compared to others but it classed as this as I didn't tear toward the back, I tore down the sides and had 37 stitches. I was sore for so long and didn't manage to enjoy sex for about a year. Mentally I wanted to get close to DH so found it a huge hit to my confidence that my body was letting me down so badly.

Birth was traumatic as MW wouldn't listen to me or DH (I was the only woman in that night and had senior MW). She told me I wasn't in labour or if I was it was early stages - 20 mins later I had a baby in my arms as I was 10cm when she said it - queue cross words between registrar and MW.

Now, after 3 years, I'm getting broody and wanting a little brother or sister for dd, but am torn as to whether to push for a c-section or try natural again.

I'm so confused as to how I feel and what I want. Any advice?

I also had 2nd degree tear with DC1 which went untreated due to a very busy unit. I was very sore, healing took a long time and like yourself it took a long time to actually enjoy sex again. Strangely enough, I didn't really consider a section for DC2, I suppose I thought that they wouldn't consider me a suitable candidate, plus I didn't want to be incapacitated afterwards with a toddler to look after. On the plus side, I had no tearing or lacerations with DC2 and after a couple of days felt fine, really like I hadn't just had a baby at all. It sounds like you were really let down by your MW and perhaps had she helped you manage your labour more effectively, she may have reduced your tear. If you are really worried about a natural labour again then you really should get as much info as possible on a c section as these aren't without complication either. Don't know if this helped much, but it was definitely easier second time, with a bigger baby too!

I think you'd be entitled to a c section and I don't know what your chances of tearing like that again are.

I have 2 friends who had bad tearing the first time round,1 went for elective section and the other had another vaginal birth.She did tear but not as badly.

Both were happy with their decisions.

I have had 2 sections(both emergency).The recovery is not a walk in the park but neither is recovery from 37 stitches in your downstairs!
Sorry no help but sure others will be around to give their experiences.

Thank you. I have looked into sections and DH is really supportive either way. He's already working out how much leave he could save up to add to paternity leave and I know mum would help. DD would be at least 3 1/2 as I'm not pregnant yet.

Such a hard decision!