Induction issues.....sorry, long!

[chocolatequeen]

Think this may sound a little bizarre, but bear with me!!

Currently living abroad in DH's home country. 32 weeks pregnant, after lots of faffing about, eventually managed to find an OB, but seeing as it was about 22 weeks when we found him, we were running out of time so if I'm being perfectly honest, I wouldn't have chosen him if I'd had more time. He seems nice, but a little impersonal and fairly domineering. Told me on first appointment to watch my weight, without actually having known how much I weighed at the beginning of pregnancy etc. Has made other commments too - about me not speaking language very well, which haven't really inspired much confidence in me.

Saw him yesterday for an appointment, and he is now really starting to push for the induction option. It seems to be quite common here, basically from the practical point of view that he can deliver babies in the morning (you check in the night before, inducing you at dawn) and see his ante natal patients after lunch. He saw the notes of my DS's (London) birth, and said that at 12 hours for a first delivery, was waaaaay too long, and should have had intervention to speed it all up. I was really happy with the delivery, actually enjoyed the whole process of the stages of labour, even the hour of intense pain before I had epidural, as to me, that is all part of the birth/motherhood/pregnancy experience. Was so hoping to do the same this time, but ultimately do not feel confident in a foreign country to go against my doctor. He has promised me a "2 hour, no pain, induced labour". Not sure if it's me being a little wierd not wanting this. I think DH was a little distressed and feeling helpless last time when I was really labouring, so he can see the plus side of the doctor's arguement - I don't think he wants to see me in so much pain again, and also have the comfort of knowing that we will be in hospital in time (we live about 40 mins from hospital, and he doesn't work near home either, so if the labour is quick, we could be in trouble...!).

What does anyone think? Should I just follow the path of least resistance, and hope that this is pregnancy hormones speaking, or am I going to regret it forever if I get pushed into doing something I'm not 100% happy with?

Sorry this is so long, just wanted to get it off my chest!

Any advice welcome!

I would try very hard to find another doctor, or just ignore him and stay at home until 42 weeks and let him induce then (if necessary). If I stuck with him, I'd stay at home until the very last minute I could stand, so that I could avoid his intervention zeal.

Obviously you have to decide what you're happy with... I just feel pretty darn confident in myself that interventions do not lead to a better birth experience.

Personally, if I made a decision to do something in my labour before it had started that I wasn't 100% happy with, I'd regret it.

Once labour is progressing, I'm very open-minded about how it goes, but if I chose to take the path of least resistence because everyone pushed me to have, say, an epidural, I know I would regret it.

As for promising you a two-hour, no-pain induction - if he knows how to do that, why isn't he a millionaire trillionaire gazillionaire?

Can you say which country you're in, or would you rather not?

As for a 12-hour labour being a long time for a first one - no it bloody isn't! Yes, some people give birth quicker, but some take a considerably longer time.

Plus there are a lot of people out there who are very shocked and take a while to get over a speedy delivery. Quick isn't always good when delivering babies!

I am of the opinion that birth is the most amazing, fantastic, experience that I have or will have and think the pain is all part of the whole motherhood experience.
I know that not everyone thinks this way, and for these women this ob's attitude would be appealing, but from what you say regarding your attitude to birthing he doesn't sound like the man for you. So I don't think that it sounds like your pregnancy hormones speaking - it sounds like what you really want.

Can you not have another search to see if there are any others?
Are there really no other options? Are there people such as doulas where you are, to support you/dh?

i didn't really want to be induced for birth of dd but felt somewhat out of my depth (first baby and foreign country) and didn't have much choice.
I really regret this now.
That doesn't mean that it would be wrong for you though. I say go with your instincts and if you're not happy with it - don't do it.

I had an induction both times but still found myself saying "No! No! No!" when reading your post. There are absolutely no guarantees about how long an induced labour will be so he is wrong to make such promises IMHO. I don't think that 12 hours for a 1st birth was particularly long either. With ds1 it took 40 hours and with ds2 it took 6 hours.

By all means go ahead with it if it's what you want but don't do it just because it makes the doctor's schedule a bit easier.

Thanks for all your input - spoke in depth to dh about it, and he's very supportive of what I want. I'm just not very good at really being pushy for what I want, so am very easy to 'overpower' if someone shouts loud enough, iyswim. Also, tend to trust in doctors to advise me to to the right thing, but think on this one I'm going to get a little more forceful! I've been given the name of a doula too, so I'm hoping to meet her next week for a chat and to see if she can help in any way.

Thanks again for all the advice - I'm very grateful!!

i can understand how you feel. in the country dp was born in they still perform episiotomy and forceps deliveries as standard 'to speed thing up' (!?)
His mum seems to think this is entirely normal and is pushing me to elect for delivery in such way..not only do i think that a ludicrous idea but i'm pretty sure no doctors or midwives would condone that in this country.

Oh my god.... I feel for you. Don't know what country your in but I know it's fairly normal in some places. However, I was induced at 36 weeks due to big baby and back problems advised by my OB. However, discussing it with a midwife at the hospital on a visit she advised me against it. I wish I had listened. They can't promised anything as far as time of labour is concerned!! Mine was 21 hours long and I ended up having every drug in the book. Pain drugs, then the drip to start the contractions off again!!! I would A, go with what you feel is right!! and B, I think the midwives advise of "as little intervention as possible" was the best ever. My experience of child birth was completely out of my hands, and although I have a beautiful ds I'm sure the reflux problems he has were caused by this... but maybe not. Who knows.