natural or c-section after tear

[Tori27]

Won't bore you with full story but ended up with 2nd degree tears. I know this isn't bad compared to others but it classed as this as I didn't tear toward the back, I tore down the sides and had 37 stitches. I was sore for so long and didn't manage to enjoy sex for about a year. Mentally I wanted to get close to DH so found it a huge hit to my confidence that my body was letting me down so badly.

Now, after 3 years, I'm getting broody and wanting a little brother or sister for dd, but am torn as to whether to push for a c-section or try natural again.

Birth was traumatic as MW wouldn't listen to me of DH (I was the only woman in that night and had senior MW). She told me I wasn't in labour or if I was it was early stages - 20 mins later I had a baby in my arms as I was 10cm when she said it - queue cross words between registrar and MW. This is also a factor in the decision.

I'm so confused as to how I feel and what I want. Any advice?

I know exactly where you're coming from! I also found my birth quite traumatic even though I "only" had second degree tears. Five months on I'm still sore and sex is far from painless... I'll be having a meeting with the consultant who stitched me up where I will ask if I could have a section next time, if I decided that was the right thing to do if and when the time comes.

Good luck!

I think this is one of those questions where everything boils down to the birth itself. They are all different and just as you have normal deliveries that have problems you have normal deliveries where everything is fine.

Having only had 3 c-sections with no labour I found the 2nd and 3rd ones particularly traumatic. So although I had a great experience for my first c-Section the next 2 were not so good.

If it were me I would garner as much information as possible about both types of delivery and research possible outcomes following the kind of birth you have already experienced.

Good luck!

I agree with Sparkle.

You need to really think through all the pros and cons, research the issues, discuss with your midwife/consultant, and don't feel under pressure to make a decision quickly. You are under no pressure to reach a conclusion, even once you are pregnant - there is plenty of time.

One thing I would say is that c-sections can be great (I've had two with no problems), but the wound and recovery can be quite a shock to the system. I felt very brutalised after my first section. I wasn't prepared for that physical feeling that I had been cut open, or for how physically weak I would feel for weeks afterwards.

bump

Has anyone else experienced this and decided to go for c-section.

I had a 3rd degree tear with my first and am now 28 weeks and booked for an elective section this time round.

I decided this because I still have ongoing incontinence issues though, so it was recommended by the consultant so was much easier to get agreed by the medical staff. There is a great thread about requesting a section after a traumatic birth on here that would be worth reading as it has lots of people's stories and links to other helpful information.

I also found going through my experience and over my notes with a midwife from the hospital extremely helpful. Good luck whatever you choose.

One of the things about 2nd degree tears as you note is you could pretty much tear off a leg and they would still be 2nd degree if they are in the right direction, it isn't really much of a description at all. You might want to discuss this issue with a consultant to see if you had a "bad" 2nd degree tear by their reckoning. The physio I have been seeing to improve my pelvic floor said that the damage to your pelvic floor increases from the 1st to 2nd birth then plateaus with any other births. I had problems with recovering from a 2nd degree tear and have been told that I will be allowed to choose a CS next time if I want. Given what I have experienced, it will definitely be a CS.

TORI27 I am so glad you asked this question. I had similar experiences - bad second degree tearing which is still not fully healed four months on, and bowel problems (but not incontinence). I was determined I wanted a section next time (when brave enough), but saw the consultant last week to check progress and I brought up possible subsequent pregnancies. He said he would not recommend a section. He said that based on statistics my recovery would be quicker from another vaginal birth - I do see his point, but I don't think that statistics favour me! Had PPH which was statistically unlikely and bad tearing which has taken months to heal. However, I sometimes think that maybe having gone through the mill first time that it would all be more stretchy IYSWIM and that it would be easier. Has anyone found that hospitals / midwives have a clear agenda, or do they really consider advising sections in problematic second degree tearing cases? It is a while off me having to make any such decisions, but I would be really interested to sit in with you and get advice about all angles to consider.

I'm not pregnant yet and went to see the consultant before even considering pregnancy. He told me mine wasn't too bad compared to others - I burst into tears and told him that all he was telling me is that it could be worse and might be next time, which made me want a section even more!

As soon as I cried he back tracked and DH stepped in to make my point for me - in a clear and grounded less emotional way. He said he would "consider" me for a section. I wasn't convinced but DH said that he would pay for private care if necessary, but hopefully it won't come to that.

Good luck Nancynew

I had a bad second degree ter with my first son, lots of stitches but healed well. Second time round I had a home birth with not tear at all and a very comfortable experience all round. I've read on other threads on here that it is not unusual for this to happen so don't worry too much about it. For me first labour was 17 hours painful labour ( concluding in a totally natural birth, so worth it) and second time around 4 hours of mild discomfort. Once your body knows what is going on it copes much better with it.