Best books to prepare

[ihaveaplan]

I'm hoping to have a natural, active birth (against a prevailing culture of strap you down, cut you open and drug you) so can anyone recommend me some good books to help prepare?

Some of the ones I have-

Birth Skills: Proven Pain-management Techniques for Your Labour and Birth Birth Skills: Proven Pain-management Techniques for Your Labour and Birth
Juju Sundin, Sarah Murdoch

Ina May's Guide to Childbirth Ina May's Guide to Childbirth
Ina May Gaskin

(and also Spiritual midwifery by her)

Gentle Birth, Gentle Mothering: A Doctor's Guide to Natural Childbirth and Gentle Early Parenting Choices
Sarah Buckley

Birth Space, Safe Place: Emotional Well-Being Through Pregnancy and Birth
Adela Stockton

Miriam Stoppard's book and the NCT book Happy Birth Day have useful suggestions for positions to labour in at the different stages.

I think it depends what you're looking for. Personally I want to be knowledgeable about all the options/scenarios so that I know when I can say "no, I don't want that" to try and ensure an active birth, and when it might just be a case of doing whatever it takes to get baby out safely.

Are you hoping for a homebirth? We're going for a home waterbirth. There's no point, for me, in going to a stand-alone MLU (no safety benefits and it looks horrible TBH) and I'd like to avoid the hospital if possible so home makes sense for us.

I second the Ina May Gaskin suggestion.

Also 'Childbirth Without Fear' by Dr Grantly Dick Read.

Don't know if you're interested in Hypnobirthing at all, but certainly the book is worth a look - Hypnobirthing: the Mongan Method by Marie Mongan.

Third Ina May - specially Spiritual Midwifery, which you won't be able to put down (try not to get too hung up on the hairstyles or the 'groovy' language!).

Also the Birth Skills book by Junju Sundin

tbh,no one has preference to strapped down, cut open,and drugged.i wish you all the best for your birth.and hope you dont have any medical complication for you or baby that necessitate a cs,analgesia. in such cases you'd consent to anything to have a live birth

is this your 1st baby?perhaps allow your self some scope to consider that some level of intervention may happen.and at least consider how you will negotiate and respond to that.so that if it does happen you have a strategy

breathe your way through birth with yoga by julie thomas

but tbh dont think you can prepare just through a book, if you really want to learn active birth techniques you need to attend some classes, either pre natal yoga or hypno birthing or whtever works for you.

and also scottishmummy is spot on, you need to prepare yourself for the reality that you might need intervention depending on how your birth goes. but even if you do need intervention your prep will have been useful. eg i had to have an epidural despite not planning to- long story- but then it didn't always work and so my breathing techniques were what got me through.

Whilst I'm not naive enough to think that everything's going to be plain sailing UK maternity care looks positively hippyish compared to the norms here! I'm strongly hoping for a natural, active birth against the prevailing culture (and there won't be any hypnobirthing classes so can anyone recommend a good CD?!) but I'm also realistic enough to know that there will be monitoring - just less than constant - and that intervention is entirely possible. That intervention, however, needn't be episiotomy in 80% of first time natural deliveries (apparently as a 'preventative measure'), automatic C-Section for a breech baby or epidural as standard etiher. I looked at the stats for my one option if baby arrives in a hurricane and I'm fucking terrified. Whilst I'd love a homebirth they're just not allowed here...or at least you're not allowed to plan them. Waterbirths aren't permitted either.

I'm honestly not exaggerating the strap you down bit either. DH's colleagues wife was actually strapped down on her back on a bed (and the woman is by no means crazy) because she didn't want an internal exam during labour and the doctor insisted. Intervention rates are scarily high for no seemingly good reason :( I didn't mean to offend anyone and I know that sometimes things do go wrong, it's necessary to have a plan and a live birth is preferable to the 'ideal'. If there's something wrong with me or the baby I'm first in line for the knife!

by all means assert your wishes,but yes do consider intervention may happen,consider your negotiation tactics etc.i hope all goes well.alls im saying is sometimes you need to be flexible.dont set self standards that only a natural birth,no analgesia, chanting an incantation and bouncing up and down on gym ball will do

you are not in uk then

ihaveaplan where are you out of interest?

The Natal Hypnotherapy book is really good and I read it for my second pregnancy. I can't remember the title but it is on the 'Natal Hypnotherapy' website. I also used the Pregnancy relaxation and Birth Preparation CDs.

I had two hospital labours which were reasonably natural and definitely not of the 'strap down, cut open and drug you' variety!

I "third" the Ina May Gaskin suggestion.

Also 'Childbirth Without Fear' by Dr Grantly Dick Read - definitely.

Janet Balaskas "Active Birth" and "Water birth Book" are a must, and any other of her works are worthwhile too.

Anything by Michael Odent too.

Ju Ju Sundin's birthskills. A wonderful, wonderful book. That got me to 7cms without anything other than cocodamol, a birthing pool and some reflexology/aromatherapy... and flinging vitriol at my hubs, obviously.

I still ended up with a spinal after 19 hours, including an hour and a half of pushing where my helpful midwife ignored my comments of not wanting to push, because something felt wrong and removed my gas and air to 'help me concentrate', emergency c-section after DS got stuck in an unbirthable position known as deep transverse arrest (about as much fun as it sounds), huge bleed and a stay in high dependency after the birth.

You can only plan so much - read up on all the eventualities and try to remain sanguine.

I second the Natal Hypnotherapy CDs, and book, but also the Mongan Hypnotherapy book. They cover much the same theory, but the Mongan gives you definite breathing techniques to concentrate on, whereas Natal is more "just breath deeply but however you want to".

ihaveaplan - are you in the US? It is very different to the UK I know (not set-up for home births for one thing!).

I think knowing your stuff may be even more important, so that when the doctor says "you should have x/y/z" you & your birth partner know reasons why to not have it if it isn't necessary (e.g. monitoring can be done regularly with a sonicaid to avoid continuous monitoring).

Childbirth without fear is v. good. Explains how your body is designed to do it naturally and how the medicalisation of it is not always a good thing. Ina May and Mongan also good. And am about to order the others recommended on this thread now!

I'm in a US type maximum intervention country so was keen to gain as much knowledge in advance to avoid anything unnecessary.

I am on my third pregnancy - having had an emergency c-sectio with first and vbac but with stitches with second delivery ...

... to prepare for my 3rd delivery I am reading Ina May Gaskin, Guide to Childbirth and I so wish I had read it first time round.

ps. Also reading Juju whatsername, but preferring Ina May.

Did I miss it or nobody has mentioned 'the birth book' by the Sears?

I have always been terrified of giving birth, even before I even got pregnant, and after reading it I am actually looking forward to the birth, all thanks to that book.

Based on what you say, it seems right up your street too.

I'm somewhere in Africa - can't say more without outing myself as I haven't announced to MN at large (or the people I know in RL who are on MN) that I'm expecting yet.

It's definitely US style though - most expat medical care here is done by US professionals.

I have a feeling I'm going to end up buying all these books!

Which is best for explaining the cases for and against types of intervention/monitoring etc? Preferably in male friendly language as well, as DH could legally over-rule my wishes so I want him to understand the rationale for everything.

I'm actually really heartened by the stories shared by those of you who had labours that didn't seem to go to plan. Do you think good birth prep helped you come to terms with that more easily? Because you knew from research it was necessary or because the techniques you learnt were applicable to both?