Oh please someone say positive things to me <<wail>>

[QueenOfFlamingEverything]

40+5 today with second baby, and went to see midwife this morning. First DD was born on her due date, textbook labour and delivery at home.

This baby is completely back-to-back and head is still high, nowhere near engaged.

She tried a sweep but my cervix is still 'long, thick and tightly closed'.

I am now a bit frantic and very weepy, what if the baby doesn't turn round or engage? What's stopping it? Its been OP on and off since 28 weeks, no matter how much walking and kneeling and crawling and shagging I do.

Midwife is saying the hospital will expect me in for induction next week, which I know I can refuse, but its just added stress. Plus the hospital is 25 miles away as we are very rural here, and DP doesn't drive, so getting in even just for monitoring etc would be a nightmare. I am terrified of hospitals, I can't bear even the thought that I might have to go there to give birth, tbh I don't think my body will give birth in a hospital.

Can't stop crying

I have heard that some babies don't engage until labour. I am sure there are positions you can sit/lie in the help turn a baby - I know you can turn breeches using different things, so maybe google 'turning back to back baby' and see if anything comes up? Have lots of sex too - my MW said the gel they use is the same as sperm. {{hugs}}

googling shows getting on all fours helps, bum in air...

completely normal to not be engaged for 2nd baby - I didn't with mine. Also when in labour with DS3 they told me they thought he was B2B - I freaked as first was dreadful B2B labour. Anyway she told me that as he wasn't my first there would be loads of room in there for him to turn when in labour. Best advice for you now is to get on your hands and knees and start scrubbing the floor - the kneeling will encourage the change of position and the scrubbing will maybe take your mind of it. Also sex worked for me 2 out of 3 times for coaxing them out.

Oh god the floor is filthy [slattern]

Am currently dangling over my birth ball with the laptop on the floor (not the filthy floor, the freshly hoovered bedroom floor).

I am just worried that there's some reason the baby has been back to back all this time, why doesn't s/he want to settle the right way round, what if I used up all my birthing luck last time round etc etc...

Try going swimming and doing lots of somersaults, it made my DC2 turn head down. HTH

every one of my births has been different so don't think you will have used all your labour luck. My B2B boy can be a really awkward bugger when he likes - maybe it started in the womb? he's still lovely though. really feel for you though cos it's so crap from about 38 weeks onwards and going over is dreadful. Now you really know the meaning of the phrase 'pregnant pause'..

Oh no, my textbook birth DD is an awkward enough bugger when she chooses as it is (she is divine anyway though)

Just feel so, dunno, pathetic. And needy. And weepy. DP is a star though and is being amazing.

"Just feel so, dunno, pathetic. And needy. And weepy..... "

Hmmm, sounds as though you might not last until 'induction next week' as your baby will already have arrived. Good luck

Try on all fours four times a day for 15 minutes at a time.

Spend a lot some time sorting out who and how you are going to get to hospital when you go into labour, and also sort childcare for your dd. Hopefully it will be a waste of time...

I'm inelegantly draped on all fours as I type.

Hoping for another HB (have a whole other thread as to whether that's still realistic though) so childcare not too much of an issue as we live with other people anyway. But there's always time to obsess over hoovering and washing the dog bed etc etc

I hope weepy and needy is a sign...

Acupuncture and reflexology?
And keep bouncing on the ball and shagging on all 4s!
Good luck, I am 40+10 so send you sympathies!

Ds2 was steadfastly op for weeks, until halfway through labour and he didn't engage until right before labour started - he was 40 + 8.

He was by far my easiest labour, nice gradual build up of contractions which were painful but manageable (stood and swayed with each one) and I was only in hospital for an hour before he was delivered - wasn't worth going in for really, as I would have been fine at home.

So, basically I was in the same situation as you at 40+5, but it still all turned out alright.

I also agree with juule, if you are feeling this emotional it could be a really positive sign.

Good luck.

I had an OP baby and she was born in a short sharp 1hr 10min labour, no stitches - all the pain was in my lower back nothing in the front at all. I managed totally pain relief free because G+A made me ill, allergic to opiates so no Pethedine and no time for an epidural. You sound about ready to go with the weepy and needy.

I would agree with the being emotional as a sign that things will be happening soon!

As for being OP, try googling "spinning babies" for some tips (other than on all fours on the floor!) on trying to turn baby before and during labour.

Hope it all starts soon for you.