Any positive birth stories? I'm a bit terrified!

[lelarose]

Due my first baby in October. Reality starting to sink in. Really very scared of the whole thing.

Would anyone mind sharing any positive experiences with me? Thanks.

Thanks everyone. wonderful to hear! Am doing hypnobirthing and hospital ante natal classes, just get a bit freaked out from time to time and imagine the worst. Thank you all for sharing your stories.

I was v scared beforehand as well as I don't think I deal well with pain but I had a pretty easy time with ds, waters broke on the sunday, didn't get any proper contractions til about 5pm the following day, they came pretty rapidly then but were manageable without any pain relief, went to the hospital at 7.30pm, they said I was too far gone to have any drugs (I wasn't impressed at that point!) so just used gas and air and ds was born an hour later, no tearing.

I think that antenatal pilates helped me plus lots of bouncing on my gym ball and drinking raspberry leaf tea (from 35wks)

good luck!

my experience was v positive, and i was like you before hand, very scared!

First off, i listened to natal hypnotherapy birth prep cd every day from 36 weeks and these helped me to feel more prepared and calm in those last few weeks. I would definitely recommend.

On the day before my due date my waters went at 4pm while i was sitting on the sofa. No dramatic gush, just a constant trickle over about half an hour.

Contractions started at about 5.30pm and just felt like mild back ache. Put tens machine on at about 6.30pm as i had heard someone say you should put it on early while contractions still mild, but i didn't feel like i needed it for pain relief at that point.

At 7.15pm we got into car to go to hospital as they had asked me to go in just to check me over as waters had gone. In the car i realised contractions had gone to every 3 minutes and were stronger but still very manageable. Got to hospital at 8pm and was sure that after the check up they would tell me to go home. Turns out i was already 4cm!

At about 10pm i asked for some gas and air as the contractions were coming about every minute, and at that point the midwife ran me a bath and put me in there with the portable g&a. The bath was bliss and honestly I felt so calm and happy. I just went with the flow and kept in mind that the peak of every contraction only lasted a few seconds and that my body was designed to handle it.

At 11pm I started to feel the need to moo and midwife said I should get out of the bath as I was ready to push. I was genuinely shocked as the pain was no where near as bad as I had imagined it would be at that point. I thought I was only about 6cm dilated.

It took me 45 mins to push DD out and it was hard work but not as painful as the labour part because i was concentrating so much on pushing. I didn't have any 'ring of fire' feeling as she came out and i only had a slight internal graze. She came at 11.49pm using just water and g&a for pain relief, 8 hours from waters breaking and just under 4 hours in active labour.

Even DP said that he was shocked at how easy it seemed. He says he kept waiting for labour to really kick in because he expected shouting and screaming like he had seen on 'One Born Every Minute', and he was really shocked when MW said it was time to push because he had expected me to be weeping and wailing by that point.

I felt brilliant straight after, and would do it all again in a heart beat. In fact, my only regret is that I can't remember some of the pushing stage because i was a bit out of it on g&a and i can't remember my DD actually being placed on my chest.

Your body was designed for this, just keep that thought in mind and you will be fine.

Please make sure you have a really good hard re-think about homebirth before you dismiss it, statistically the safety is about the same but with drastically reduced CS and forceps rates, improved "birth satisfaction" scores and less need for pain-relief. You just need to get your head around your cultural conditioning against it. I too thought I'd be safer in hospital the first time - with hindsight I'd have been better off at home. Having said that, my first birth was not at all traumatic - just overly medicalised (and I reckon overly damaging to me). My second birth was lovely - I don't want any more children, but I would give birth again like a shot!

I used to think that perhaps first-timers would be better off in hospital, but the stats have persuaded me otherwise. At least 60% of first-time homebirthers have a natural birth (no CS, forceps, ventouse, induction or augmentation with drugs) - versus less than 20% hospital birthers. By that description, first-timers have the most to gain from homebirth.

Did you see the hombirth reference site - particularly the "why homebirth" section.

Another positive story...

I was induced at 41 weeks with no option of pain relief other than gas and air (long story). I was incredibly nervous and remember feeling very squeamish about having a canula put into my hand. However as soon as things started to happen I was surprised at how my body seemed to instinctively know what to do. Don't get me wrong it was bloody hard work but the feeling of absolute exhilaration when DD finally emerged was BLISS. I felt like I was in a dream-like fog for about 12 hours afterwards. The first look at your newborn when you almost feel that you recognise each other is enough to make you forget the labour. I can't wait to do it again!

smilehomebirth I agree with what you say and have read similar information on homebirth. I think what worries me is if the baby gets into distress would I not want to be in a hospital? Or what if I can't take the pain, I would want a choice of pain relief available.

See my main fears are that I will not be able to make decisions for myself, because I will be distressed or that the labour wil go on for days and I'll get so exhausted I'll just give in. I know they will have my best interests at heart to an extent, but I'm just not very good with hospitals, and already throughout my pregnancy I have felt a bit as if I'm on a kind of conveyor belt.

And I definately want to try a water birth, but with only 2 pools in a very busy hospital probably not much chance of that.

Lela, some of those fears might be allayed by having a doula, if you can afford it. Lulumaman is a doula, as are several other MNers - they may be able to give you more advice.

how much do they charge, do you know?

DD was born Sept last year. Woke up with Period Pain so slept in spare room, got a good nights sleep. woke up at 8am took the dog to the vets, bought a paper, when queueing to pay for the paper I got a twinge, it was about 8.45am. drove the three minutes home and got another one on the drive. Went in and told DP I was in labour, timed the contracts to every three minutes. Called the hospital, after passing the phone between myself and DP while I had contractions, hospital said to go in, by the time I got there it was about 9.55am and I was 8cm dilated. Had gas and air (no time for epidural that I wanted. DD was born at 11.55am, first push my water broke, third push she was out. One stitch, toast and tea and I was ready to go home (they made me stay in though). I was shit scared and wanted an epidural but just didn't have the time. I felt like I had been kicked in the crutch by a donkey for a few days, but looking at my DD made it all worth while.

I love talking labour!

I have one word for you ... Hypnobirthing! Its the most amazing thing I have ever done. Google it. I chose the Marie Mongan method as she really devised it and my dh and I did the course too - costs a couple of hundred pounds but worth every penny. If you can't afford to do the course buy her book. You can get a copy that comes with the cd which you should listen to once a day.

My first labour was great. Woke up at one am when my waters broke - never seen my dh jump out of bed so quick lol! Contractions started ten mins later and were every three mins from the off. Went to hospital about half four am to be told I was fully dilated. The pushing took a while and I had to have a small episiotomy but apart from that it was fine. No gas and air or anything. Ds arrived 613am.

Second labour was even better. Mild contractions from about 1130 am but far apart so wasn't sure whether it was actually it. Did some shopping, picked up ds1 from pre-school, took him out for lunch, went home and put ds1 down for his nap, tidied away the toys, mopped the kitchen floor and then by about half three I was pretty sure it was it so put my hypnobirth CD on. Midwife came and found me to be 5-6 cm dilated - most displeased bearing in mind my first labour lol! I lay in bed for most of the labour and was that relaxed that my body just did it all for me. I felt the baby get lower and so got in the birth pool. My transition consisted solely of one comment to my hypnobirth teacher who had come to the birth out of the goodness of her own heart: "I don't think I'm coping very well with these surges" (contractions). Ds2 arrived a few mins later when my body naturally birthed him - without me pushing at all (no pushing in hypnobirths). He arrived at 720pm, in the pool with me lifting him out and the midwives just watching.

I'm happu to talk more about hypnobirthing if you ask but for someone who is afraid it is ideal as it teaches you not to fear.

here is a thread with some costs - london and elsewhere.

Don't be scared! Labour and delivery were so positive and exciting for me!!!! I prepared loads, went to NCT, active birth yoga, NHS ante-natal, listened to natal hypnotherapy cd's and read every affirmative book I could get my hands on (I subscribe to the knowledge is power school of thought )

I had a very long latent phase - days and days of stop-start, and honestly, the adrenalin keeps you going! TENS is a wonderful thing, as is being in your own surrounding as long as poss even if you go into hosp for delivery. I had a fab home waterbirth, postively enjoyed it all and can't wait to repeat the experience!

I've had two HBs (including my first ) and they were bothe FANTASTIC, pain was not half as bad as I thought and I even enjoyed the whole experience. Big thumbs up for hypnobirthing here, used it for my second child (who incidently was nearly 10lbs at birth!) and it made a huge difference.

lelarose - I was surprised that I loved giving birth - I went on a long walk and had a bath - I did not really think I was in labour but I was.

I had relaxation music ( a really long playlist) that I had played during my pregnancy. My DH brought in loads of liquid. I think I gave birth within 3 hours of being in hospital. I drank loads and loved the music.

We felt like the birthing room in the hospital was very homely - or at least we made it that way - low level lights are what I remember.

I had a water birth.

Yes it hurt, and I tore, but it was a fantastic experience, I used gas and air.

I had a wonderful MW and my husband was fab.

Good luck!