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5yr old changed during 6 weeks

10 replies

Emmaaa1990 · 22/09/2025 07:51

I wonder if anyone can help. I’m abit worried about my 5yr olds behaviour. During the 6 weeks she stayed with my mum and dad, had a couple of weeks at holiday club and then I was off and so was her dad. Her routine was obviously out of whack due to being off for a period of time which has never happened previously as she had just finished reception.

she began worrying about things, worrying about going holiday club, worrying about staying at my mum n dads (even though she’s done this a lot) she’s never stayed there for a week though but she did this time.

she appears to be quiet and withdrawn at times, not with me or her dad, but she’s quiet when she sees my mum and dad, barely says hello just holds onto me. Since starting back at school she is very clingy with me and emotional, crying at breakfast club drop off, doesn’t want to leave me.

i brought her a worry monster and have had a chat with her teacher about my concerns. Her teacher has advised he is VERY emotional and always says she misses me and wants me.

we are on week 4 of school and back to routine, and just this morning she was quiet and weird when my mum n dad arrived (they take her to school on a Monday) she also cried when I left. I’m not sure what’s going on, it’s like she’s got major separation anxiety all of sudden which began in the holidays.

On Saturday I went to dinner with my friend and she didn’t want me to leave her with her dad even! I’m abit at a loss on why this has happened and how I can help? I brought her a worry monster so she can draw her worries etc but it’s upsetting my mum n dad that she’s not the cheeky happy child she was. Upsetting me because I don’t want her to be sad but I don’t know how to help.

anyone had any experience with this? Thankyou x

OP posts:
TallulahBetty · 22/09/2025 11:52

To be clear, is she 5 going on 6, in year 1?

Ignore me - missed it in your first paragraph.

Emmaaa1990 · 22/09/2025 11:53

TallulahBetty · 22/09/2025 11:52

To be clear, is she 5 going on 6, in year 1?

Ignore me - missed it in your first paragraph.

Edited

Yeah she’s just started year 1, she’s 6 in May

OP posts:
ArtTheClownIsNotAMime · 22/09/2025 11:56

When exactly did the change happen? E.g. was it right after she stayed with your parents or right after holiday club started?

Emmaaa1990 · 22/09/2025 11:58

ArtTheClownIsNotAMime · 22/09/2025 11:56

When exactly did the change happen? E.g. was it right after she stayed with your parents or right after holiday club started?

As soon as she knew she was going holiday club she was abit worried from then. And then I was prepping her letting her know she was going to mums and she was worrying about it beforehand. So it probably started when she knew she was going holiday club (first time she’s ever been) it’s like the change and being away from me all of a sudden has triggered it. She started complaining of tummy ache like I would assume an anxious belly. She hasn’t complained of stomach ache since she’s been back home with me. But she’s still upset going breakfast club and the thought of leaving me. And this is going on a month now.

OP posts:
MummyDummyNow · 22/09/2025 11:59

Did something happen when she was at your parents? This is worrying behaviour. Can you ask her gently, if something she didn’t like happened?

CrotchetyQuaver · 22/09/2025 11:59

I had similar with one of my DD, she must have been about 8. My husband was working away for 6 week stretches at a time. I put it down to separation anxiety. She couldn't explain why she felt like she did, I couldn't even leave her at Brownies! School she did cope with though.
unless something actually happened to scare her at her GP's it could actually be as simple as a week away from you was just too long for her to cope with.

Emmaaa1990 · 22/09/2025 12:07

MummyDummyNow · 22/09/2025 11:59

Did something happen when she was at your parents? This is worrying behaviour. Can you ask her gently, if something she didn’t like happened?

She hasn’t said, I have tried to ask she just said she doesn’t want to be away from me. I will try and probe her some more. She stays with them regularly and nothing has been a problem before. I’m wondering if it’s the length of time she was away. When I picked her up snd chatted to them she was fine snd playing, so it’s really weird

OP posts:
Emmaaa1990 · 22/09/2025 12:08

CrotchetyQuaver · 22/09/2025 11:59

I had similar with one of my DD, she must have been about 8. My husband was working away for 6 week stretches at a time. I put it down to separation anxiety. She couldn't explain why she felt like she did, I couldn't even leave her at Brownies! School she did cope with though.
unless something actually happened to scare her at her GP's it could actually be as simple as a week away from you was just too long for her to cope with.

Oh that’s good to know, did it go on for long? I would have thought by now she would be settled I’m sure we are 4th week in at school. I still had tears last week when I dropped her off. So I can’t pin point one trigger cos she does it at breakfast club, and when I leave her with my mum n dad. So it does appear to be some form of change and separation anxiety. Not sure if I need to speak to a gp or anything but I don’t want to be dramatic. She’s absolutely fine at home

OP posts:
Tiswa · 22/09/2025 12:10

How long did she stay at your parents?

Emmaaa1990 · 22/09/2025 12:16

Tiswa · 22/09/2025 12:10

How long did she stay at your parents?

For a week which is the longest she has done

OP posts:
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