Please or to access all these features

Child mental health

Mumsnet doesn't verify the qualifications of users. If you have medical concerns, please consult a healthcare professional.

Extreme school anxiety

6 replies

Trayxc · 26/01/2025 21:25

My 10 year old ASD daughter has severe school anxiety. She has always struggled with school from starting nursery. She has learning difficulties and auditory processing disorder. She has an EHCP and lots of help at school but her anxiety around school is taking over her life and ours. She worries about it constantly... every single day is a battle trying you get her there, she has all the usual anxiety symptoms, she has night terrors, she hardly sleeps, in the morning she's shaking, feeling sick, tummy pains, she cries every morning going into school and the teachers basically have you drag her away from.. it breaks my heart. I try to do the right thing, well what the school think is right, and that's force her in but I'm so worried it's all affecting her mental health. She cries several times throughout the day and they don't send her home. She's scared to step foot in the playground. When she comes home shes burnt out and needs to lie down in her room and then the anxiety starts up again, worrying about the next day.. its just turning into a vicious circle and she seems quiet and depressed 😢

School know about her problems and think the best way is to keep making her go in but I disagree. We have an appointment with the educational psychologist next week to discuss this and find ways to help her. Have any of you guys been through this with your kiddies and what did the psychologist suggest to help with this awful situation? Any help would be greatly appreciated x

OP posts:
Trinity69 · 26/01/2025 21:29

My son was like this. Please don’t force her in. School based trauma is real and can be so damaging. Lucky for us Covid hit and gave my son 6 months off to fully decompress. My daughter is now going through the same thing and if she wants to go she does but if she doesn’t, she doesn’t. Seriously considering home education for her at this point.

WhateverEh · 26/01/2025 21:32

Home ed helped in our case.

Trayxc · 26/01/2025 21:34

Trinity69 · 26/01/2025 21:29

My son was like this. Please don’t force her in. School based trauma is real and can be so damaging. Lucky for us Covid hit and gave my son 6 months off to fully decompress. My daughter is now going through the same thing and if she wants to go she does but if she doesn’t, she doesn’t. Seriously considering home education for her at this point.

Aaaww it's awful isn't it seeing them like this. I let my daughter stay off the other week because she was sick with worry and the school sent the pastoral team round to check on her.. which makes things worse because now she's scared when she's off in case they come to the house.

I'm seriously thinking of home education too... what does your daughters school do when you dont make her go in? Are they ok with it?

OP posts:
Iizzyb · 26/01/2025 21:36

I follow Dr Naomi Fisher on fb and Substack. I watched a webinar this evening about teen burnout. Highly recommend her materials. She also writes books. She had great insight & advice in my view x

Trayxc · 26/01/2025 21:38

Iizzyb · 26/01/2025 21:36

I follow Dr Naomi Fisher on fb and Substack. I watched a webinar this evening about teen burnout. Highly recommend her materials. She also writes books. She had great insight & advice in my view x

Thankyou I will check her out.

OP posts:
KaliforniaDreamz · 16/02/2025 14:19

No do not force her in. With an EHCP you should be able to work in what works for her - attending school seems like it is torture right now. A flexible approach is what is needed. This may mean some time out to recuperate and should be marked as authorised absence for anxiety. The work towards a part time timetable if she can tolerate. if not home school. the main thing is not to let her health get worse.
good luck xx

New posts on this thread. Refresh page