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Child mental health

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4 year old hyper & Aggressive

1 reply

Bawnie2 · 17/06/2024 12:24

Hi all, long time reader first time poster, hoping someone can help.
Apologies in advance for the extremely long post just trying to give as much info as possible.
We are almost at breaking point with our 4.5 year old boy and his behaviour lately. He has always been an energetic child and has always been intelligent even ahead. However lately his energy levels and with it aggressive behaviours are just gone out of control. Everything with him is a battle from getting dressed, eating, getting into the car no matter what we ask him to do if he doesn't want to do it there and then you are into a battle.
His outbursts range from roaring, screaming, running, throwing, climbing, jumping and hitting and kicking. He can be peacefully playing with some toys and out of no where hes screaming and throwing the toys for no apparent reason. If something doesn't go his way he is screaming and throwing things away.
He will randomly kick, punch or knock his 3 year old brother when passing him and thinks it is all hilarious. He screams in our faces, run offs in public, pulls everything out in shops (it is embarrassing taking him out in public at the moment). He knows what behaviour is not acceptable and will often tell his brother or friends to do things he knows you are not supposed to do.
His Pre-School are finding the same issues since last September and finding him extremely difficult to calm back down as he will get the whole class riled up.
When talking to him it is almost like he doesn't hear you at all, like he is completely zoned out, you physically have to touch him to get his attention.

We have tried the time outs, the warnings about behaviour, the taking away things that he throws, removing him from games if he becomes aggressive, sitting down talking about what is acceptable and unacceptable. Nothing seems to work.

It was so bad at his brothers birthday 2 weeks ago our friend's and their kids had to leave as he was injuring people, drop kicks, hitting, screaming, throwing things at them despite repeatedly talking to him and removing him from the situation to calm him down he would be back at it within a few minutes of returning.

There is a family history of: ADHD, ADD, Autism, Anger Management issues and his younger brother is awaiting assessment for Sensory Processing disorder so a bit of everything there.

Last note he was attacked by a neighbours dog 2 months ago, but these behaviours had started before that, it does seem to have increased the aggression side a bit tho, he also had his tonsils and adenoids removed 12 months ago which means he does now have more energy than before.

Has anyone any other suggestions to help him?

OP posts:
CurlyCrazyMum · 16/07/2024 05:47

Hey, how’s it all going for you?

I have a similar little boy, he’s high energy constantly!

He has shown aggressive behaviour on and off from the age of 2, he is now 4.

What helped was when his communication developed and he was able to communicate his wants and needs rather than use actions.
I was also very strict with the timeouts in his room, he hated this so it seemed to deter him.

My little boy is also very friendly and wants to play with kids constantly, so when he could understand I’d explain to him children wouldn’t want to play with him if he hurt them!

He has been a lot better for the last year, however every now and then the behaviour rear their head again and it makes me highly anxious tbings will revert back to how they had been!

we also have family history of adhd and autism etc, awaiting an appointment with the paediatrician.

Hope things get better for you!

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