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Potential adhd? Unsure, need advice.

8 replies

Mamawhoneedsadvice · 02/04/2024 08:44

Hi, sorry for the long post ahead I just would appreciate some advice to what everyone thinks, what are the next steps ect.
so I need some advice my ds is 4 and does 3 hour nursery sessions Monday to Friday, school hasn’t picked up on he’s behaviour all they have said is he likes to play fight with the boys, he’s very clumsy, and he’s got a speech delay (under health visitor)
but when he’s at home, out, with family ect i have a different child.. so he has never ate at nursery so they wouldn’t know but he’s eating is very fussy and very limited he won’t try new food, if he don’t like the look or smell he will throw it and say yuck, Food has to be hot/warm if it goes lukewarm he refuses to eat it, if something is slightly over cooked refuses to eat it even if he likes that food item. He also doesn’t like to sit down while eating he likes to have food In one hand eating and then he will play with the other or walk round ect.
so moving into hes speech he is behind in he’s speech but I do understand majority in what he’s saying and he is under a speech therapist so I’m not worried about that to much.
He is very clumsy to the point he hurts himself constantly, recently he did fall over leading to a hospital trip but that doesn’t stop him from carrying on running climbing not listening but when he does hurt himself now it’s like he has anxiety and he has to check it’s not bleeding and he doesn’t need the hosp. He also runs constantly hates to walk but when he runs he is always looking back or to the side to see what everyone else is doing and not focusing where he needs to go.
he doesn’t understand danger he will just run off try to go into the road ect.
He’s way too friendly with strangers even though I have drilled stranger danger into hes head since he was about 18months old.
he shouts at me on a daily basis, he will have a melt down if he don’t get he’s own way full on tantrum, he repeats himself a lot if he asks me a question and I answer and he doesn’t like that answer he will sit there and constantly ask the same thing over and over.
Can’t take him into any shops because he will want and if you say no he screams the whole place down throwing fits or he will just try and run off with the item he wants. Can’t wait for something if he decides he wants something he has to have it then or he screams kicks off
He constantly interrupting conversations even if I say one min wait your turn please he won’t
Does things before thinking such as he can hurt you and laugh but if you get sad or cry he’s devastated and wants to say sorry and comforts you
He doesn’t like loud noises he will sit/stand there with he’s hands over he’s ears
Sensitive to bright lights / light outside through window
He can’t dress himself even though I have tried and encouraged it
Touching things he’s not allowed too such as at theme parks, zoos ect if there’s a character statue which has a barrier round he will try and climb to get to it and if he does he will then process to kick punch touch the item even after being told no so many times
He won’t sit down and watch a movie he likes to be on the go 24/7
As soon as home he takes shoes and socks off don’t wear socks or slippers even if it’s cold
Fidgets a lot and constantly pulls faces
Non stop talking / making sounds
he gets bored of activites very quickly then wants to move on to something else
im not sure if this means he could potentially have it as I have mentioned it to the school but they brush it off so I’ve been questioning myself thinking maybe it’s normal boy behaviour but the constant not listening to me ect is getting to much because I’m unsure what to do at this moment in time.
thankyou to anyone who reads this posts / replies.

OP posts:
Mamawhoneedsadvice · 02/04/2024 11:48

Bump

OP posts:
ProfessorPeppy · 02/04/2024 11:51

DS1 has Autism/ADHD (he’s 11) and shared some of these traits, probably not as pronounced. I would be taking your son to the GP, it sounds really tough for him.

Should he get a diagnosis, don’t rule out meds. They have been life-changing for DS1.

FlowerBarrow · 02/04/2024 11:54

I think you may struggle to get any support or recognition until towards the end of his Reception year. Until then, from nurserys point of view since they don’t see all his behaviours, he is a normal active boy.

EliflurtleAndTheInfiniteMadness · 02/04/2024 12:24

Its so hard at this age, there's a wide range of normal behaviour, you may well be told to wait and see if he grows out of it. ADHD especially isn't usually diagnosed till school age. Some of what you've written is very similar to my Autistic 7 year old. He likes to bounce on an exercise trampoline while watching TV. He would eat while bouncing on it too if I let him. We have the trampoline so he would stop bouncing on the couch. He'd watch TV turned upside down. He would run away in the shops and hide and think it was hilarious. He had no boundaries, didn't worry no matter how far away he ran from me. Never got scared. He has more boundaries now at 7 thankfully. He feels everything intensely. School they see him stim a bit, chew his clothes, nothing to suggest ADHD though. I have wondered occasionally, but ADHD needs to be present in at least 2 different areas of the child's life, so at home and at school. So we wait and see.

His brother, also Autistic, was a whirlwind of destruction at that age, would hop from toy to toy, never settling on anything for more then a couple of minutes. Would scatter toys, charge into people's legs, climb the furniture and smash into things. His paediatrican was expecting to diagnose him with ADHD on top of his existing ASD diagnosis, but wasn't willing to diagnose before first year of school. I wasn't convinced, thought it was sensory overwhelm, at school he was fine, no problems, no ADHD. He was just so overwhelmed by the world he couldn't cope. Everything was too loud and too bright and too scratchy. We've had a nightmare time with clothes and other sensory issues.

At this age the behaviour could be something or nothing. I would see your GP and see if they'll refer as diagnosis can take a long time and by the time you get to the top of this list he'll be a bit older and maybe the answer will be clearer. They might not be willing to refer yet though.

Mayflower282 · 02/04/2024 12:24

Sounds like normal developmental stage. He is pushing the boundaries and figuring out what is acceptable and what you will stop him from doing. I wouldn’t be worried unless he was behaving this way at around 8/9 years old.

Brendabigbaps · 02/04/2024 12:27

some things are adhd but you won’t get a referral until he is 6 at the earliest.
He sounds more asd to me though.
see your health visitor or gp.
nursery won’t do anything

Curlewwoohoo · 02/04/2024 12:29

Sounds similar to a young relative who has recently been diagnosed with autism and adhd. However I wonder if it's too young to say really. Just something to keep in mind.

Mamawhoneedsadvice · 02/04/2024 14:39

Thankyou for all replies, I think I’m going to speak to the senco teacher at hes nursery and book a gp appointment just get some advice in what I should do to help and support him and just go from there.

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