Suicide risk

[bombastix]

I need some help for my child. 12 years old. Discussed suicide before Christmas and was clear that would consider it if made to see ex. Looks like elements of trauma too.

Been referred to CAMHS but have got nowhere yet even thought it was an acute referral; seeking a private assessment.

Has anyone had similar circs? Or could recommend a good psychiatrist? I am worried for her but haven't been able to get anything out of CAMHS at all; I'm being left to manage circs all by myself.

My friend is going through similar with an older teen at present. I'm afraid that CAMHS have been useless - told her unless her DC did actually attempt, there was nothing they could do and it was for her and the DC's school to care for them 😭. I've come in here in part to see if anyone has some miracle suggestion my friend hasn't tried.

Hi, my daughter is currently on the waiting list to see a in-house councillor at school. Ask your daughter school if they provide support, they should.

If you can afford to pay privately Id do that, get her seen by a psychologist that specifically works with children, it's quite different to working with adults with mental health issues. Also go on a waitlist to see a psychiatrist that works with children if you can afford it, even privately they'll probably be a wait. If you have a University near you that teaches psychology they might run a cheaper clinic. The one I've been to had final year students under the oversight of clinical psychologists and was really good at a fraction of the price. Id also speak to your school and you might find there's some local charity that provides cheaper mental health care, where I am there's a program run by the Catholic church locally. You dont have to be Catholic to access it.

Mind has some information around suicidal ideation and some helplines that might be useful https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/guides-to-support-and-services/crisis-services/helplines-listening-services/

Child Mind Institute have information for parents on how to address this with your. child https://childmind.org/article/youre-worried-suicide/

When my DD was suicidal the first thing her psychologist did was a suicide safety plan. This included things like removing anything she'd been self harming with, things she could do if she started feeling like she wanted to die again, helplines she could ring, people she could trust to speak to.

There's information here on them.

https://childmind.org/article/what-is-a-safety-plan/

My DD was 9 when she first started feeling suicidal. Its a horrific thing to go through as a parent. I still feel broken when i think about that time. She is doing much better now, a combination of medication and therapy and also making some life changes like joining a sporting team to help her self confidence and to get her out of her isolation a bit. I think her abusive Dad moving out might have helped too. Im so sorry you're going through this, ideally the right professional help is good to get, but that's not always an option and there is a lot you can do to support her on your own.

Thank you @EliflurtleAndTheInfiniteMadness
You actually reminded me I did do therapy for a lady who was just starting her business and needed the experience and reviews.

Animal therapy is another good one, the lady I had actually had a beautiful dog who was so calm. I guess these teenagers don't like to talk and find it hard to label what the feelings are - but even as an adult sometimes we don't know our feels ...

I know it will be alot of research for what is in the area.

My daughter has gone through a hard breakup and having to go back to school she has to see him again. I thought she was getting better but now she's had a attempt with her wrist. It's heart breaking, me and her dad are so devastated.

All the help and any help is welcome. It's really nice to have someone to talk to x

Thanks. One of the issues is trying to get private support when there is a suicide risk. I've had two providers say no on that basis, including the Priory. So feel very stuck with it.

I should add we have concluded a safety plan but it's very draining to manage this. So thank you for the links.

@bombastix
Have you tried the bacp website and counsellors directory?
I got my DDs therapist from there.
Therapists are a but cheaper than a clinical psychologist but if the issues are deeper (like my DD), you are better off starting with a psychologist.

I have had a provider say no to me as well...rather they said they are not well equipped for crisis support.
I told them clearly I know the drill and wasn't looking for crisis support. I know whom to call and where to go for emergency.
In the end they relented and gave me a list of their staff but I was put off by them and didn't go with them in the end.

Try the GP again. There is a service below camhs called early help. They are one tier below camhs and they should be able to offer something.
Again, there is a wait list.
Alternately you can self refer to talking therapies on the NHS.
But your dd may be best off with 121 counselling to begin with.

Take care
Xx

Thanks this is positive and thank you for the explanation of early intervention which is where we are now.

I have a meeting tomorrow with what I believe to be an early intervention service which can refer on to CAMHS as required. This is positive but it has taken a lot of effort to get there.

If it had just been about money, no issue. It is just complex as a diagnosis and I want the public sector on board. I know private medical care can be good but it can also be slipshod from my own friends and family. The incentives can be perverse when paying.

I know there are many others in a similar way. Wishing you all strength

@bombastix
The only thing I find is camhs are quick to push medication.
I am not anti medication but it needs to go together with talking therapy which they cannot provide because of wait lists.
Ideal scenario would be psychotherapy first and then medication later but sadly this isn't the case.

I wanted to update on this and to say that yesterday my child was accepted by CAMHS and we have an appointment next week.

This is good, but the process of access in of its self is draining. I am exhausted and the child is a fair bit worse imo.

Again a big thank you to those who responded and on the navigation of the system which is critical; it tests the child and a parent thoroughout.

What I am doing is drawing on and now arranging multiple sources of support and have found a psychologist privately with CAMHS expertise should the process in the public sector fall short.

This is just the start but I know there will be others out there with the same challenges; so if this thread is useful to you, do keep it going for yourself.

@bombastix
Glad to know camhs are stepping in.
It's the start of a long journey but some help is better than no help.

My dd is with crisis team..one tier above camhs and the support they give is helpful.
It takes blood, sweat and tears to access the service unfortunately.
It shouldn't be this hard.

Xx