I can’t believe I’m writing this but desperately need help.
late last night my DD (16) told me she had been thinking about suicide, about what to say to us to say goodbye. She had thought (I don’t know if it’s planned) thought about doing it on a particular day next week when she will be the only person at home. She told me what she would write in texts. She was really really upset, distraught.
Today she has been less emotional and we have talked, a lot. We went for a walk and she was very open with me. She has been feeling like this for some time. I didn’t know 😢 She described year 10 (currently in yr 12) as being particularly hard, she used to think about just getting through days. “I’ll just get to Monday”
she also told me that she used to hurt herself, she wouldn’t tell me more , partly cos I think she was trying to protect me.
There are a number of things that make life difficult for her, undiagnosed Autism and a number of medical things. But she has been carrying the weight of this for so long. She had said something years ago, maybe year 8/9. She had some counselling and never mentioned it again. I thought this meant that she had worked through it. I feel so guilty that she has been dealing with these thoughts and feelings and I just didn’t know.
So what do I do?
I have emailed college and will speak to them in the morning and have made a referral to CAMHS. But what do I do? She has said a number of times she doesn’t want us to treat her differently. But what she has disclosed , it’s all I can think about.
Im so sad for her, that she feels like this and so scared.