Tw self harm and suicide, ask me anything

[Askmeanythingyouwant]

Username change as dealing with sensitive issues.

For context, I used to self harm and deal with suicidal feelings as a child and teenager, which begun around the age of 7 and went away at 17. Was diagnosed with anxiety and depression during childhood and currently awaiting for adhd and asd diagnosis on adult services. I had a bad family background with arguing parents who inevitably divorced and was constantly lied to and mentally and physically abused and manipulated by them.

As such I used to self harm almost daily for several years of my life and felt suicidal on a daily basis for around a decade. I couldn’t go to lessons at school and it got to the point I was told to drop out

I truly thought my life was going to be ended by myself until one amazing teacher I had back in secondary understood all my struggles and helped me through it.

I’m not asking for sympathy but am offering any advice and open to asking any questions anyone may have surrounding these topics, whether for themselves, a friend or their child

sending hugs to you all and please be kind in the comments (kindness costs nothing 🤗)

What did she or he do that turned things around? And have you ever had the feeling since even fleetingly

@HeBeaverandSheBeaver if you’re talking about that one teacher, they listened to me and made sure I knew I wouldn’t have to go through anything alone that they were a safe place for me and there was more to me than all my problems (which many teachers made me feel like a burden for). They were actually upset when they found out about my self harming and was like take it one day at a time I’m so proud of where you’ve come and what you’re going to go on to achieve and I’ll be here every step of the way and they were so right. Considering I never had a stable home life it meant so much having an adult I could trust and wanted to help and support me out of free will and not because they had to iyswim.

in terms of the feelings now, I don’t remember the last suicidal thought or self harm related urge I had, which is so much progress for me, I do still occasionally get thoughts, usually when overtired/overstimulated or had a lot go wrong or somethings triggered childhood trauma related memories.

Thanks.

Are you happy now. In a stable job. Home life etc.

If your ND do you think the diagnosis will help you.

@HeBeaverandSheBeaver I’m so much happier than I ever thought I would be with stable relationships/friendships and a progressive looking career!

I think an ND diagnosis will help me understand my childhood struggles a bit more. For example, I always have been very sensitive and have several unpleasant memories where I’m not sure why I reacted in that way and got upset so easily included with bullying etc so I think a greater understanding that it wasn’t my “dodgy personality “ or something bad about me but that I’m just wired differently to your typical person will hopefully give me a sense of closure, particularly as I distance myself from my childhood trauma and begin to move forward with the life I always told myself I’d live one day :)

I'm glad you have found your place now