Anxiety in 10 year old…

[Mindovermatter247]

Dd in the last year has been getting very anxious to the point where she’s thrown up. Certain situations seem to activate it. Travelling ( she gets car sick), separation anxiety. She’s going to her best friends for a sleepover, she’s been there loads, but because I said I wasn’t going to wake her before I go to work and she wouldn’t see me till Thursday, she started hyperventilating, saying her belly hurt etc. then said it was because she didn’t know where to leave her phone when they visit the local outdoor swimming pool. I said just to leave at friends house. I’m not sure how to help her as I have high anxiety too, so when ever she gets anxious, then I get anxious. What’s the best coping mechanisms?

I think maybe she needs to feel as though she has some control. My DS (also anxious tendencies) insists that I wake him before I go to work. So I do. I give him a cuddle and tell him he can stay in bed. He also tells me, every time I leave the house, that he will call me if he needs me. This might make your DD feel stronger too. Just saying it out loud.

I have been through this with my son. It's very hard so I do sympathise. Unfortunately in my experience it is unlikely to get better without help as anxiety can spiral.

What we did was find a private psychologist who did cbt. This worked brilliantly! We worked through a personalised version of the book "how to help your child with fears and worries". He was like a different child after this course.

The anxiety did return a few years later after some stressful events and we contacted the same lady. We put the same principles in place again and he is almost back to normal. It is a thing he will deal with forever unfortunately but hopefully he knows the tools to use (with our help) and can get back on track.