my teenager lives with anxiety and depression, he refuses to go to school, now we have to go to court

[sadmum7]

My son who is 15 since Covid could not go to school for long periods of time, he suffers with anxiety and depression. Spoke to GP they diagnosed anaemia but otherwise was not help full, school is not helping either and now we are taken to court. Any one has any advise?

I'm so sorry. That is really tough. If you can afford it then get a solicitor.

Home schooling ?

Withdraw him and homeschool

A few of you say home schooling, how difficult is it with paperwork to withdraw someone?

Will the Dr write a letter explaining why he isn't in school? That's what we did, then he was still on roll, school provided work but he wasn't expected to attend.

Join a homeschooling group on Facebook or Google there are template for letters to send. I emailed and posted a copy. You don't need to give a reason. The homeschooling person from the council will contact you. Depending on your situation you don't have to agree a meeting can all be done by letter and reports to them to provide evidence of learning. But the actual leaving bit is easy.

He's not refusing, his MH is preventing him from attending.

I'd ask the GP to write a letter.
Has he been referred to CAMHS
Have you been keeping in contact with school?

Has he been signed off sick?

Has he a diagnosis of anxiety and depression, you mention anaemia only?

Would he do online school? My son went to interhigh during the pandemic (as he loves learning so hated that school stopped) and I was very impressed. Some people get local authority funding to attend I think

Facebook group Not Fine in School have lots of resources and plenty of support to offer. Ask there, I feel for you OP dd spent time out of school due to anxiety too.

Do not take him off the school roll. Seek a CAMHS referral - change GP if you need to to find a Doctor who takes DS's MH issues seriously.

Consider applying for an EHCP. His needs are not being met currently.

Ask LA to provide alternative provision if he has missed more than 15 days this year.

Take legal advice - have a look at Coram's Children's Law Centre. And, yes, Not Fine in School is a good shout.

Get help from Not Fine In School.

FWIW my DD hasn't been to school for 1.5 years and she gets support at home from the school. She's got Tourette's, likely ASD, overwhelmed by noise and can't tolerate being around many people. She has anxiety too and school have been supportive.
We had to fight and write numerous letters to get help. She did take overdoses (x2) due to the stress though so think that's been a bit of a turn in their ways, especially when I pointed out that it was the stress of not being schooled when she wants to do well, and what they were offering wasn't something she could do and keep herself safe.
Good luck and remember they have a duty to teach your child, ask if he can do online work (DD is starting these lessons now as well as 1-1).

Agree with joining Not Fine in School and get in contact with your local Sendiass for support. Have you considered whether he is autistic?

And look at ipsea https://www.ipsea.org.uk/school-anxiety

Does he have a diagnosis or anxiety and depression or are you making an educated guess? Do you want him to go to school? Does he want to go but can't?
Firstly, request help for his mental health by going back to the GP and requesting a CAMHS referral.
Secondly, ask school for help. They could consider a reduced timetable, not necessarily in the classroom bug in a pastoral setting at first.
Thirdly, request early help support from your local authority or ask school to make a referral for you.
If your ds is working with CAMHS they and school could consider a referral for medical needs tuition.

All of these will demonstrate to the court that you are making best attempts to meet his mental health and education needs. Going to court could work in your favour if you demonstrate that you are asking for help but not getting it.
Alternatively, you could choose to EHE but think about how you will provide his education and address his mental health.

It's relatively easy but then the LA then have no obligations towards DS. Better to keep him on the roll and see if he needs an EHCP. If he does, there would be many tailored options for DS, including LA funded Education Other than at School.

There are a few free and low cost options - you will find this on Not fine in School. Also, a lot of local colleges have small EHE provisions for colleges to help home Ed kids get GCSEs. I am linking a random example https://edc.ac.uk/study/age-groups/14-16/elective-home-education-14-16 be aware that school refusal can count as ‘behavioural’ but go and visit and see if your young person is interested.

For my own teen, we accesses oak national academy content for one gcse with the exam taken at the school she was still on roll with. I haven’t checked lately, but not all oak national academy content was there. I think that could work to do a couple of GCSEs - teaching seemed good quality to me.

All of the above op. 💐💐

How does he spend his day OP?

This was my dd. We had a very supportive GP though.

In the end l took her to see a private pyschiatrist. ( 18 month waitlist for CAHMS ns there’s not much point in seeing them
anyway)

She prescribed fluoxetine. It’s been a massive help.

That's helpful to know. Did he have side effects? How quickly did it work and how did you know it was working?

I means she, not he.

@jasminsweetpea .

Not much in terms of side effects Bit spaced out, sleepy, mild headache occasionally and one day where she felt ‘sad’. I made her stay with me in that day.

There was a noticeable difference within 2 weeks. More chatty, less anxious. It’s hard to explain. After not being allowed to mention certain friends for 2 months, she was suddenly telling me they had texted her for this and that. She was just much perkier and happier.

She told me she felt much better, but couldn’t say why🙄

Thank God for modern medicines. I don’t know what her life would be like without them.

The pyschiatrist was amazing. She’s top honcho at the children's mental health in our city. She is also lead across the whole county.

l didn’t go to one of the big commercial firms. They were stupidly expensive.

Thanks, that's all really helpful. Were you recommended her? Don't know where to start looking.

No, l just did some research. My county is South Yorkshire if that’s any help?