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Child mental health

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Stress & Anxiety

7 replies

BabyST · 23/01/2023 19:46

My son 16 is having a hard time at school at the moment. He’s failed some subjects and looking at repeating some.

This has all blown up in the last few days but ongoing for a few weeks. At the moment he’s got no drive to do anything just comes home from school and doesn’t do much. I have noticed he does get up much and he’ll wait till the last possible moment to go for a wee, he moaned he needed an urgent wee when his brother was in the bath then asked in urgency if he could wee outside. We live on a retired farm so no big deal as such with that.

The fact is he now complains his stomach is sore and everything hurts. He gets boy pain when really stressed and I’m worried he’ll make himself so sick we end up in hospital again. When my dad died he was so stressed he ended up with two gastric ulcers.

We are an open family but all of a sudden he is shutting down, I’ve spoke to the school but not sure how else to help him. I haven’t seen him this low before and I have a feeling he’s adopted the motto “I’m a boy I’m fine” which is obviously not the attitude I want or support. We discussed his concerns over dinner tonight and he feels like a failure and lost all motivation. Does anyone have any suggestions what I can do to support. I’m at my wits end

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TeenDivided · 23/01/2023 19:52

I'm a bit confused. Is he y11 and if so how has he already failed things, or y12 and if so doing what and retaking which?

If he's y12 and it is all going wrong, he can restart in September maybe at a college?

If y11 is he just totally overwhelmed? Does he understand there are options whatever grades he gets?

Relaxing techniques, having a plan for schoolwork, exercise, plan Bs.

What is pastoral care like at school?

Bobbybobbins · 23/01/2023 19:53

Do the physical symptoms possibly suggest a UTI?

BabyST · 23/01/2023 20:05

Yeah Year 12. He doesn’t want to lose his group of friends but I think he will. We need to sit down with the collage / school (I’m Irish and we use different terminology)

no infection just not doing anything about it

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TeenDivided · 23/01/2023 20:12

If you are in Ireland anything I said about restarting may not be valid.

You need to get him to open up. Maybe a long car drive?

BabyST · 23/01/2023 20:18

DH and I have plans to take him on a long dog walk tomorrow while the others are at school. A day away from the stress followed by lunch might help

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TeenDivided · 30/01/2023 11:37

How's it going?

BabyST · 31/01/2023 20:04

Much better thank you he’s sleeping at night now and it’s made the world of difference

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