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Child mental health

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15 year old DS - terrible sleep anxiety every night

3 replies

peasouper5 · 28/12/2022 12:25

My teenage ds has developed terrible sleep anxiety since going abroad in July with my MIL. This was the first time he has been away without us (mum, dad, younger brother).

After he returned he could not sleep (never been a major problem before) and started saying that when he went to bed he would spend hours ruminating and worrying that he wouldn't sleep. This has developed into full blown sleep anxiety and now he spends the day worrying that he won't sleep.

I have tried to reassure him with the science/biological mechanism of sleep and that he probably is sleeping but doesn't realise it. I have also taken him to speak to our GP who has also reassured him that it is very common and that he will be sleeping.

The problem is that it is not really about sleep - it is that he has developed this anxiety. He is quite sensitive anyway and will be doing his GCSEs in a few months and it is heartbreaking to see him like this. He is a very sweet and kind natured boy.

He now has this sort of Pavlovian response to sleep - all triggered by the initial inability to sleep on holiday with someone he doesn't know very well and who wasn't very sympathetic to his worries and he felt trapped by (MIL) and being in a foreign country which felt alone and unfamiliar.

I am going to try and find some sort of therapy for him but I don't really know where to begin. I suppose he needs to break the connection between sleep and the feeling of anxiety that was triggered by the initial problem back in July.

Has anyone had a similar issue and if so, what helped - so far we have tried magnesium, cbd relaxation oil, speaking to our GP who attempted to reassure him, sleep hygiene (going to bed earlier, tiring him out by doing things that occupy his mind and make him physically tired), getting him off the computer at a reasonable time, both his dad and I speaking to him at length to try and ease his concerns. However, nothing seems to work long term.

OP posts:
lottie2888 · 28/12/2022 18:52

Melatonin ( you can buy online ) seems to help my friends children. I think you can get it prescribed here but I buy from the states. My DH takes it.

I think though some counselling would help. Have a look at CBT maybe?

Takingabreakagain · 28/12/2022 19:07

Does he have a smart watch? If not would one help if you think he is actually sleeping (even if only a bit) it would help him see that he is.

gettingalife · 28/12/2022 19:17

This was me at 23. It took me a long time to realise I had to relax mentally to go to sleep and the only way I've done this is through listening to a mindlefulness app. I had to find a way to retrain my thoughts so I didn't panic about not sleeping. I use the sleep podcasts on Calm. Saved my life! He needs to retrain his brain and thought process so he can relax so that sleep will come.

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