12 yo attacking me physically during meltdowns

[StNicholasisKnickerless]

Extreme anxiety. Currently in long MH crisis that involves regular meltdowns due to the anxiety. There's a query for ASD.

In full anger, where I believe she loses control she attacks me. Today I've been bitten on my arm which will have a sizeable bruise. Bitten on my back where the skin is broken and kicked and slapped enough to leave bruises.

We are with CAMHS for the anxiety -it's slow but we are being seen and awaiting support. Going to need a separate referral for the ASD apparently.

What do I do about this. Clearly it's not ok. Single parent. She never do this to her dad. We are divorced.

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It's hard . My DD has been doing it for years.
I've recently been doing a Non Violent Reistance course and all the other parents go through the same thing. You could ask your GP if there is a NVR course in your area.
I haven't called the police yet but one of the other families have done so. They said it did calm down their DC at the time but it wasn't a permanent solution.

How is she when she's with her dad? Does she mask then and take it out on you when she returns?

If she is not doing it with her dad then it is something she can control.

Have you spoken about this with her dad?

@megletthesecond

It's hard . My DD has been doing it for years. I've recently been doing a Non Violent Reistance course and all the other parents go through the same thing. You could ask your GP if there is a NVR course in your area. I haven't called the police yet but one of the other families have done so. They said it did calm down their DC at the time but it wasn't a permanent solution.

@megletthesecond Thank you will look into this

@HollowTalk

How is she when she's with her dad? Does she mask then and take it out on you when she returns?

There's definitely masking going on. To the point he doesn't see any potential ASD. if I told him he'd punish her rather than work with me unfortunately.

She may be able to control it with him but it's not as simple as that. Sadly a really complex situation.

Could she go and live with her Dad for a while. I don't think you should keep her behaviour a secret from her Dad.