Mumsnetters aren't necessarily qualified to help if your child is unwell. If you need professional help, please contact your GP or local mental health support services.
Mumsnetters aren't necessarily qualified to help if your child is unwell. If you need professional help, please contact your GP or local mental health support services.
Child mental health
DD and Bordeline Personality Disorder
ChristmasSchmismas · 10/12/2021 19:21
Does anyone have any experience/advice with a child who is displaying signs or been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder?
My DD (15) has been under CAMHS for almost 2 years but we recently requested a change in therapist as she wasn't "connecting" with the initial one. She has seen her new therapist a handful of times and is happy with the change.
We've had an extremely difficult week with her emotions/behaviour etc. to the point where I've spent most of it in tears because I don't know how else to help her.
Today the therapist told me that she's exhibiting traits of BPD and it felt like a weight had slightly lifted by having a tentative diagnosis and therefore some kind of understanding after years of emotional challenges.
I know I can only breathe for a minute because there's still a long road ahead especially because she can't be assessed until she's 16.
I've been Googling this evening but it would be so helpful if I could hear from others and their experiences and to not feel so alone.
Cyberworrier · 11/12/2021 16:59
I was diagnosed with BPD in my 20s- wish I'd been diagnosed in my teenage years. I managed to hide most of the issues/self destructive behaviour from my parents so they didn't realise and I didn't get help.
I understand it must be a big shock for you all and that your daughter is probably struggling/suffering, but BPD is one of the "best" diagnoses to get as it is a condition that can be treated very effectively, to the point that many would no longer fit the diagnostic criteria after treatment.
Dialectical behaviour therapy or DBT is the clinically proven, very well founded treatment for BPD. It is possible to access via the NHS but probably a very long wait unfortunately. If you are able to afford it, I'd try to get her seeing someone for DBT as soon as possible. It's often a mix of one to one and group sessions and I know that it is available to teenagers as well as adults.
I hope that is of some help to you.
Cyberworrier · 11/12/2021 17:01
Ps she wouldn't need a formal diagnosis to access DBT privately. I'm not sure about via the NHS- I was offered DBT before having been formally diagnosed but it possibly is different for under 18s.
ChristmasSchmismas · 13/12/2021 07:11
Thank you @Cyberworrier
Just reading your experience and getting some advice has helped so much.
I will look into DBT privately and see how much it costs. If I have to get a second job, then I will!
Cyberworrier · 14/12/2021 08:52
I'm glad to have helped a bit. I would try asking your GP, just in case by the way. They may be able to provide some extra support and in a way it might be good to be on the waiting list/in the system, even if you go private for now. Also, I've never used them but you could approach one of the mental
Cyberworrier · 14/12/2021 08:56
Sorry posted too soon! I was going to say one of the mental health charities like Mind and see if they have any advice. I've only ever heard of either NHS or private DBT, but I know with other forms of therapy there are sometimes subsidised groups or sessions available- just in case you could get signposted to something similar for DBT. Finally, there's a book called "I hate you, don't leave me" which is quite informative about BPD. Apparently it's considered outdated in some circles but my former therapist rated it and I found it quite interesting when getting my head round stuff- and it might be helpful for getting ideas for how to help as a family. Best wishes to you and your family.
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