14 year old DD - school change?

[lemonsaretheonlyfruit]

Hi I'm at a bit of a crossroads. DD under the care of CAMHS (weekly appt) and awaiting Autism assessment. Her therapist is convinced this is the reason for her struggles at school and MH issues. She missed all of year 9 due to anxiety and things had been better in year 10 since she was put on sertraline but things are sliding again.

She's actually ok with the lessons. It's the school environment she struggles with. The noise, the social side, the structure, lunchtimes, the playground etc. The school have been good up to a point but there is a limit to how much a mainstream school can do witch I understand.

She called me from the toilets yesterday after yet another panic attack and I just can't see her struggle like this any more. She has completely lost her spark, she says she feels sad most of the time and she rarely sees friends.

I am on a FB group called not fine in school and most people in this situation seem to have gone down the home schooling route. I don't think this is an option for us for a number of reasons.

What other options do I have? A friend was saying her friend's son who is similar got into the BRIT school and is thriving there.

We do live nearby but she's not hugely theatrical or musical.Her Camhs therapist mentioned an alternative provision school but didn't seem to know too much about it herself.

Do I need to try and get an EHCP? All I seem to hear is how lengthy the process is. Under what circumstances would I apply?

Does anyone have any advice on next steps? It's so heartbreaking to see her on this downward spiral and I just want to see her happy again.

Thankyou

Yes, apply for an EHCP. IPSEA have a model letter you can use. The threshold for applying is a) has or may have SEN, and b) may require SEN provision to be made via an EHCP. If you don’t have to appeal the process takes 20 weeks from your application.

In addition to applying for an EHCP if DD can not attend school due to her MH the LA have a statutory duty to provide alternative education. Did DD not receive medical needs tuition during Y9?

Don’t deregister unless you actively want to EHE. By doing so the LA will say you are making suitable alternative arrangements and relieve the LA of their duties. Even if DD can’t attend school being on their roll prevents her needs being swept under the carpet.

Without additional support in place a school move at this point could be jumping out of the frying pan and in to the fire. A failed move would be detrimental to DD’s MH.

Hi @Imitatingdory

Thanks for taking the time to respond. This Is really useful.

Would you happen to know if there needs to be an actual diagnosis for me to start the process? The waiting list for the autism assessment is as long as you would expect - but her CAMHS therapist is convinced.The school is extremely aware of her struggles so it shouldn't come as a huge surprise.

By applying for an EHCP am I effectively saying that (if it's granted) then I don't want her to be in that particular school any more and the LA have to seek alternatives? Ie paying for home schooling?

Did DD not receive medical needs tuition during Y9?

Funny you should ask this. No!! It was only towards the end of the school year that I was aware of this. I am now very annoyed that nothing as done sooner. Do you know if it's something that in practice has to be fought for? The EWO applied toward the end of the school year and it wax turned down. If A year off school (apart from dipping in and out of a few online lessons in the various lockdowns) doesn't merit it then I don't know what does!

No I won't deregister her unless or until I find a better option, and would definitely not send her to another main stream school.

So I guess the main/ only option would be home schooling? The Camhs therapist mentioned alternative provision but I don't know too much about that in practice.

Hi OP, you don’t need a diagnosis to apply for EHCP, nor is it saying that you don’t want her to attend the current school. It is saying that her needs can’t be met by the school without additional funding. Hope this helps.

My dd is in a similar situation but in Wales where EHCP doesn’t exist, but I do know a bit about the law.

I have previously home educated a sibling and for my dd I don’t feel it’s a good option plus she doesn’t want it.

Are there any SEN advocacy organisations local to you who can advise you on your options? I believe it’s SENDIASS in England?

Alternative provision will depend what’s available in your area. Some areas have hospital schools.

I’ve just had medical needs tuition approved for my son - they needed a letter from someone at the right level at CAMHS, case manager I think.

You don’t need a diagnosis to apply for, or get, an EHCP, they are based on needs rather than diagnosis.

Many LAs (it is the LA who are responsible for medical needs tuition rather than the school) drag their heels when providing medical needs tuition. The request should not have been turned down. Write to the Director of Children’s Service at the LA complaining, and request tuition begins ASAP otherwise you will be forced to begin Judicial Review proceedings. Ultimately you can force the LA to provide it via JR, if you need to go down this route contact SOSSEN for help with a pre-action letter.

Don’t electively homeschool, EOTAS provision by the LA is not considered homeschooling. There is an important distinction - the LA retain responsibility. What alternative provision is available depends on your area.

By applying for an EHCP you aren’t automatically saying you don’t want the current school, some DC stay at the same school but have increased support via the EHCP. Via an EHCP you get to name your school preference. Unless the school is wholly independent your preference must be named unless the LA can prove:

• The setting is unsuitable for the age, ability, aptitude or special educational needs (“SEN”) of the child or young person; or
• The attendance of the child or young person would be incompatible with the provision of efficient education for others; or
• The attendance of the child or young person would be incompatible with the efficient use of resources. You can also ask for a wholly independent school or EOTAS but there isn’t the same rights. So no, the LA don’t necessary have to pay for home tutors.

IPSEA and SOSSEN are better than SENDIASS who are really variable area to area, many repeat the LA’s unlawful policies, and receive LA funding so aren’t completely independent and will ultimately toe the party line. The SN section on here is also helpful for EHCP related queries.

WhenZoomWasJustAnIceLolly I believe from January you can apply for an IDP which is replacing Statements of SEN, the equivalent to EHCPs.

Bettybantz that is an unlawful LA policy. The government guidance specifically states starting medical needs tuition should not be delayed because of a lack of quickly evidence from specialists, the LA should look at alternative evidence e.g. GPs.

Your poor DD. Mine also missed most of Y9 due to her mental health and I'm well used to the panic attack calls from the bathrooms.

We took her out of a high achieving private school and sent her to the local school. They were AMAZING with her. The deputy head took personal responsibility and gave her an exit pass for the classroom so she could leave at any time and kept a really close eye on her.

We were in Australia at the time so I can't advise on the EHCP, but we went through four schools, considered distance learning/tutoring but in the end the local school worked out well, far better than the three private ones, who were spectacularly ill equipped to manage somebody with EUPD. Once we had the diagnosis and settled on the right meds things got a lot more manageable and she's now in her final year of A levels with only a couple of calls from the college (I was getting called into college at least once per week when she was in Y10, Y11).

I really appreciate all of your input. Thankyou. It's so much more understandable hearing from real people who understand the system and how it has worked for them.

Yes I am incensed (knowing what I know now) that the provision fir her was turned down after all most a whole year of non attendance. I think I accepted too much from 'the authorities' . Similar with the Camhs psychiatrist- DD barely got out of bed for 4/ 5 months last school test, self harmed all over her arms and face , spent most days sobbing undef a duvet saying she didn't want ti be here any more. I was begging Camhs in tears to do something- give her meds or whatever was needed. It was repeatedly refused as she 'wasn't communicating with Camhs' .
It took an A&E admission (self harm) for her to be seen by a different psychiatrist who immediately recognised the need for ADs . The difference has been incredible. School is still a struggle but I have to acknowledge how much better she is as a result of the Sertraline

Thanks for the advice on EHCP and the home schooling . I will start the process. We have a TAF/TAC meeting with the school tomorrow morning with her mentor and her CAMHS therapist and case manager. I'm not holding out lots of hope as essentially I think the school environment will just never be tight for her however many provisions are made.

Ironically today she has had a great day and been in really good spirits. She even went out with 2 friends for an hour which is a big achievement- bought some new hair clips and said she was looking forward to wearing them at school tomorrow (this is unheard of) but the panic seems to kick in shortly before she leaves in the morning so we shall see.

Thanks so much for your advice.

That’s interesting ImitatingDory. I believe there has been a lot of unlawful, and highly detrimental action from the school. He has been unable to attend due to anxiety (unmet ASD needs) and they have refused to send him any work home too. He’s had no education since last June - contributing to his anxiety.
Sorry OP, I’ve hijacked a bit there.

@Bettybantz

Please don't apologise. I really empathise with anyone I this / our position. @Imitatingdory you are clearly incredibly well informed about this area and your advice is really useful, thank you.

Betty if you read my last post I think I was too accepting of decisions that really weren't right, but I just accepted them as as I didn't know any better and also (wrongly) believed that it wasn't really possible to push back on decisions made by the school or Camhs - I now look back and realise I should have (and will now) push harder for things.

There was never any 'we won't send work home' message from my DDs school, more just that I asked and they didn't. I didn't pursue it too much by that point as she wasn't even lifting her head off the pillow let alone in a position to do any school work. But if it happened again now I would not back down at all.

I’m so sorry to hear you are in this situation. My son’s MH is so much better since I stopped trying to force him into school every day. It’s just his education which is suffering so badly now. He’s in year 11 and is a bright lad, who wants to go to college.
It’s so hard to have to fight for every scrap of support, isn’t it?

It’s lovely your daughter has been out with her friends. I hope they manage to put something in place for her.

Thanks @WhenZoomWasJustAnIceLolly . I will look. Yes first stop sendiass I think. I'm in Southwark in London. It can be a blessing and a curse as in theory you should have great provision here but it's the numbers of people like us who need to access it. I suppose the same is true of anywhere though.

OP, not engaging/won’t engage is often used as an excuse by CAMHS when really DC can’t engage and need further support in order to be able to. Don’t be put off applying for an EHCP if the school or LA tell you one isn’t needed or DD won’t get one. Many parents are told this but parents successfully apply themselves. Even if an EHCP is refused most appeals are upheld so do appeal. Personally, I would try IPSEA or SOSSEN rather than SENDIASS.

Wonderful to hear DD has had a good day. Don’t be too disappointed if tomorrow is difficult, we find we often pay for a good day and the following day(s) take a few steps backwards.

Bettybantz sadly many LAs have unlawful policies so it’s not surprising. It is the LA who are responsible for providing education to those unable to attend school, not the school itself. Have you applied for an EHCNA? The LA’s duty to provide education only applies to compulsory school aged pupils so it’s important to secure an EHCP for later, and EHCPs can provide more provision than medical needs tuition otherwise could.