Help, recommendations for assessment of adhd in teenager (inattentive type with major school masking)

[freckles20]

Hoping for advice on ADHD in my son and assessment please.

My 14 year old son has been struggling with his MH. It has been a long, scary and convoluted journey but he is now being seen regularly by a CAMHS case worker. She has flagged that he may have ADHD (probably inattentive type), based on how she has observed him when they are working together.

I did some research as I knew nothing about it and this was like a firework exploding in my brain- he seems a typical inattentive ADHD type and I do too.

She suggested a private assessment as the CAMHS waiting list is so long. I booked one 8 weeks ago with a local face to face educational psychologist but they have cancelled today- and now can’t help!

So I am now looking to book another one. But I am a bit worried that he is so so good at masking at school that we won’t get taken seriously. His school have reported no issues with working memory, behaviour, remembering homework and equipment. However, I feel this is down to him masking, wanting to ‘be good’ and me helping and micromanaging him make sure he has everything he needs and his homework is done!

I have realised that part of the assessment will include sending questions to his school and that they will respond with ‘no issues’ . So I’m hoping to find a psychiatrist who can understand this.

So I guess I’m looking for advice, and maybe even a recommendation for a psychiatrist who understands that some people with ADHD can slip under the radar. I can find appointments with Psychiatry UK or the ADHD centre for him (via zoom), but there is such a range of psychiatrists to choose from!

Thanks for reading if you’ve got this far!

My daughter was/is identical. She actually already had a therapist for OCD and the therapist did not spot she had ADD - it was my daughter that realised she did and asked to be assessed. Her school felt there was nothing wrong with her to the point they said they would not fill in the teacher's assessment form - twice - and that they would observe her for 6 months. I eventually reinforced to them she wanted the assessment and they were standing in the way of the treatment she felt she needed - and they agreed. They let me choose the teacher and I chose one who knew her from form and from a class where she didn't always do that well. The report came back she had ADD - and part of this was from what the teacher said. It is so so common for high functioning ADD people to mask - I also found out it seems I have it too - you really shouldn't worry about being believed by the psychiatrists. And if the psychiatrist diagnoses it doesn't matter what the school think they have to support the psychiatrist's recommendations.