Oh gosh so familiar! When our kids are high performing the perception seems to be that nothing is wrong. But sometimes there's mad scrambling to get to that (or parents seriously propping up from behind).
I think you're right to push - is there someone who has had more contact with your DD who can fill in the assessment? There are ways of helping with ADHD but it needs diagnosis first.

I feel for you OP. I have a similar Year 10 Dd. This is probably the reason so many girls are undiagnosed. How did you get to the point of seeing a psychiatrist? Is that a private appt.?
Assessment criteria does not work for bright inattentive girls who come from supportive homes. Does the school have a Senco who might understand adhd better? Have you ever flagged anything with the school they might have on record? Overwhelm, anxiety, apology for her not finishing homework?

Where is she due to go to 6th form?

So pleased to have found this post....have only recently heard about inattentive ADHD and as soon as I read about it I felt I may at last have figured out what is causing my sons struggles.
I’m also interested in how you go about getting help/diagnosis. What are the main things that can help children with this type of ADHD?

This is my daughter.

Age 15 diagnosed with ADHD. Got fast diagnosis from private psychiatrist as told it would take too long via CAMHS given GCSEs so close.

School said impossible anything wrong as high achieving. We knew she had "foggy brain" and "felt different to all the other girls".

Eventually she saw their senco after much persistence - who was brilliant and said 99% certain ADHD and referred us to psychiatrist.

Not sure why your psychiatrist is saying that she can't diagnose - presume that's her job?

Process for us

1. First visit - lots of listening - questionaires for teenager, parents and ideally 3+ teachers
   

ps She did have regular sessions at school with SENCO after diagnosed - weekly coaching for a few weeks, several times which did help - and Teachers given instructions on what she needed to support her

Melatonin for sleep helps a little but not enough... yoga and weighted blanked and hot baths all helped at different times Sleep issue ongoing sadly for most ADHD girls like this

I have DD18 awaiting assessment and about to fail A levels. Lockdown has been a disaster as one teacher was just sending work and no online lessons. We both work full-time so could not help her although when I thought b- tecs were going ahead I came home every day and revised with her for weeks.....I feel your pain.... constantly trying to get her to focus and managing a few minutes at a time. She was considered gifted and talented at primary level as had an amazingly imaginative brain and answered all the questions. Got slowly worse at secondary but teachers just said she was annoying, inattentive( oh the irony) daydreaming, disruptive, talkative. She was predicted to fail most subjects and actually passed them all as seems to function under pressure. There more I read about ADD, the more convinced I am that I am also affected and undiagnosed and that is why I never organised myself to a point of insisting she was assessed. I emailed school a couple of times with concerns that were never addressed and here we are now. Ironically she has changed her phone this week and in the process somehow lost the form she had been sent to kick off the process so we are stuck again until one of us remembers to chase it up! Good luck OP. It is so difficult for the child and parent.

vdb good luck and feel for you.... and it is NOT a disaster if she does fail A levels. Mine did last year - too much illness and procrastination, and had always done better under pressure in exams. Like yours, excelled in GCSEs

And this year she is doing them again - hasn't been easy but so far she is on track for As and A*s - and it has given her time to reflect and understand herself better. Not as much as I would hope but going to Uni this year would have been a total disaster for her.

So don't forget that she is funded until she is 19 - there is the capacity for three years of A level funding. (Or something different - mates of DD have been doing a Foundation Arts year fully funded before heading off to Uni or elsewhere)

All of this is so familiar to me. DS(12) is in the process of being assessed for inattentive ADHD. All through lockdown we have chased him from virtual class to virtual class. We are, effectively, his tutors. All his teachers praised him at the Parent Teacher zoom meetings for turning in his work and keeping on top of things. Again, all done with us micromanaging him and learning his subjects with him, in the hope that he won't fall behind. All very, very stressful, especially as DP has ADHD and I'm as good as certain that I do too!

We were lucky in that the diagnostic process started before the first lockdown, so the forms were filled in by his P7 primary school teacher who knew how he was in class. He hasn't been at his new school long enough for them to know him. As far as they're concerned, he's quiet and well mannered. They have little experience of the daydreaming, the fidgeting, how many things he forgets/loses, the total inability to be on the same page as the rest of his class etc. The consultant who is assessing him told me I shouldn't organise him, but should just let him forget stuff, get into trouble for missing homework and so on. Let him face the consequences and learn self management. But I can't bring myself to let him drown.

I feel your pain, OP. Sorry I have no answers. Lockdown learning has been hellish for us. And don't get me started on the inability to shut down his brain at night ... !

"04namechangeforthisjjjjjj"
Thanks for that. She has just said that for Sociology they will set them work now to grade and after Easter break they will give her some one to one support so all may not be lost and I know she will find something she loves and excel at it but the school years have been very trying for us all!

Sorry... have not worked out the bold thing yet! Googled it and tried quotations🤔

I highly recommend homeopathy

Following this closely as my 17 year old DD has likely got inattentive ADHD. She dropped out of Year 11 due to anxiety (she had perfectionistic tendencies and used to work extremely hard - now we know why)
I just saw this webinar and it really resonated

@NoraVayom

Thank you for posting that link. My DS is being assessed for inattentive ADHD, but that video describes my own adolescence to the point where I feel quite tearful. I haven't watched it all yet (ADD) but it's absolutely fascinating.

Is she medicated? May be worth trying, as it must be dreadful for her trying to cope with this. DS also adhd. He refused meds but has coping mechanisms and doesn't sound as severe as your DD

This all sounds so much like my DD who is only just 9. However because she is high achieving and masks in school, school don’t believe there’s an issue.

Our school was the same for my D.C. and diagnosed them with high anxiety. Their new neurologist used the QB Test that diagnosed them with inattention type at the first appointment. We’ve been using Brillia (part homeopathic) which has helped and would have been suggested by the neurologist as a first pass anyway. It’s over the counter and originated in Europe. I’m finding it’s not enough now and as they have abnormal brain activity we’ll be looking at adhd prescription meds for them

Same here, my son has been on adhd pathway for 2 years. School see small issues but because he is quiet and masks in school things aren't moving forward. We are having a terrible time at the minute, he isn't sleeping and his anxiety is through the roof. But as the school don't see these issues nothing is getting done. It's like sometimes they don't believe us.
Anyway we have been in contact with some outside agencies to try and get some support.
He is going into year 7 in Sept. I very much doubt we will get a diagnosis once he goes into high school.

It is a grave concern that there is so.much involvement at the school level in confirming diagnoses. School staff are not clinicians and the health of everyone should be dealt with confidentially by the NHS. If a girl had issues with menstruation the school would not be involved but in relation to clinical mental health issues the approach changes. It is wrong on so many levels.

Our dd was diagnosed by a private psychiatrist, we got nowhere with CAMHS who wanted only to look at potential social issues and parent blame. I suppose that avoids them taking any clinical responsibility to put things right. I recall dd's CAMHS nurse laughing when I told her of the diagnosis because at 17 dd was too old for it. To counter that, the only route was to raise a formal complaint. It is absurd and is a system designed to provide the bare minimum.

Very helpful post thank you.