My 9yr old and her acute anxiety

[NatalieM18]

Hi I wondered if anyone had any experience of anxiety in children.

My 9yr old has been suffering for 6months and it is getting progressively worse, we struggle to get her to school and as a family our entire world has changed.

She feels sick all the time which the doctors have put down to anxiety but she says she’s worried about feeling sick and then that makes her feel sick. She has been diagnosed with Emetaphobia the fear of sickness.

We are getting to the point now after seeing two therapists and trying lots of at home excersises where she may need medication because this is now happening all day every day and I am now thinking I need to stop work.

Has anyone ever had medication for this perscribed to their child? It is a last resort is there anything else anyone’s tried.

We are trying to find a clinical paediatric child psychologist who specialises in CBT but this is a slow process.

We can’t eat out, go out or get through a weekend without her having an episode it’s putting a massive strain on all of us x

Hi Natalie

that sounds really tough. what strategies is she trying at home? with it is about breaking the cycle of behaviour. With her anxieties one thing would be for her to try and decide strategies she can use herself to manage it which suit her. These may change regularly or need adapting depending on the situation. Anxiety affects so many people now but having a toolkit to dip into is really important esp if it is affecting all of you.

OP where are you? i know a very good psychologist/CBT specialist that we've used for ds. You can PM me if you want.

Hi Keri

We’ve tried square breathing, always choosing to take our thoughts over the positive bridge, we had havening done on her, we try backwards counting but mainly distraction works eventually but something different every time.

We’ve started having to do a lot separately as a family as when she’s one on one it happens less

I was an anxious child and suffered with sickness, too. Unfortunately my parents trying to help and fussing over me and worrying about me made it worse. The thought of worrying my parents and making the whole family unhappy weighed on me like a stone.

I'm not saying you should stop trying to help, just don't focus on the anxiety.. What worked with me was getting busy with positive activities - outside if possible. Try to get her thoughts and her body engaged in something else - that way you will break the cycle.

Think about her anxiety as a muscle that's become powerful and is ready to react at the slightest trigger because she uses it every day. Make sure she experiences positive thoughts and emotions frequently so anxiety is not her default.

Thank you that’s really great info. Can I ask how long you suffered for and how it took to get under control?

Thanks

Natalie

Hi Natalie

I would say that anxiety is some thing you manage for the long term and learn to live with hence why it is a good thing for her to learn her triggers and strategies to cope them.

Yes I would agree with Keri. I suffered since I was a small child. It was only in my late teens that I and my family realised what it was - it had a name and could be treated, I wasn't the only one in the world suffering, I didn't need to live like that. So you have a head start there, you have named the problem for your child and shown her that she can deal with it.

I had counselling but it didn't help. I had the odd diazepam as the sickness was very difficult to treat - it wouldn't respond to anti-emetic meds at all. CBT in my early twenties made a massive massive difference.

My anxiety is pretty much under control. Even now when I feel anxious I can function at 99.9%. When I think of how I struggled in the past the difference is unbelievable.

I have been emetophobic since age 4 and I was left to develop my own coping strategies (some more effective than others). Does it relate back to a traumatic event? If not, maybe she can think about all the millions of people who aren't sick, carry hand sanitizer or anything else which helps. Meditation apps? The only thing that has helped me was EMDR but not sure they do this with children.