Hair pulling in 9 year old

[wherearemtkeys]

Hi - does anyone have any recommendations on how to handle trichotillomania in a 9 year old? She is pulling her hair out and then likes to put the hair on her mouth and between her teeth (like flossing). We have tried to help her stop but she just can't, it seems compulsive. A bald patch is developing and I'm getting really worried.

I know that there is a massive wait on the NHS for help so we are prepared to pay for some outside help/advice - I just don't really know what to look for!

She suffers from mild anxiety and poor self esteem, but on the whole is a happy girl and doing well at school.

Thanks so much

Hi, are you still following this thread? Just so I know if it's worth posting in detail.

My DD is suffering from this and you're the first person I've come across with a child with the same issue. My DD is 10.

My son went through a phase of this in Year 3. He gradually pulled a whole section out at the front of his head.

It was a habit, in his case, so we found a piece of string that felt similar, and I knotted a few pieces together. He kept them in his pockets, on his desk at school, and twiddled and pulled them instead. The teacher was very supportive too.

He stopped after a few months, and I only remember now when I look back at the photos. He's always been a bit anxious, but nothing serious.

How old is your son now and does he still ever feel like pulling his hair?

I noticed my DD pulled her eyelashes in Year 3 too and it seemed she did not always realised she did it. I gave her a diary with stickers which she got every day for not pulling hair and then got a treat if she collected a whole weeks worth; spoke to school and she was allowed a stress ball to fiddle with which helped. She stopped pulling them for a couple of years and then suddenly aged 10 she pulled half her eyebrows off! She described getting the same feeling of itchiness which passes only once she pulls them.

I must admit I had a massive go at her for not telling me when she got the feeling to pull so that I could have helped her not to (she looked ridiculous all summer hols and her self esteem was at an all time low as she realised how she looks despite me trying to tell her it's not that noticeable). She briefly saw a counsellor but she doesn't think she benefited from it so stopped. She has not pulled any hairs since last June BUT when I ask her she admits to still getting the feeling to pull about twice a month. She just uses a stress ball or fiddling toys and they help. She used to get this feeling 5-7 days a week so it's an improvement but still.

She can be anxious in a sense that she's a worrier, and has a slightly low self esteem although generally is quite a happy girl. I'm worried this 'wanting to pull and fighting the urge' will not go away. Knowing she still gets that feeling makes me on edge as I feel like I'm watching her like a hawk in case she gets super anxious and actually pulls anything again. Has it gone away for your children??

It went away after a few months for DS, and I think he has forgotten about it now. He's year 7, so it was a few years ago.

He is also a bit of a worrier, but happy and not overly anxious. He worked out that he was doing it when he was concentrating, so reading, playing chess, etc. The knotted string really helped and the teacher just made sure he had it in his hands when he was in class.