Behaviour change when people come around or when we visit others.

[WS12]

I would like some thoughts on why my DS acts the way he does when we have people around or when we visit others. I would really appreciate if anyone here has any child psychology knowledge and could I've me an insight into the way his mind works...

I'm not too worried about him as he's doing well generally - he's healthy, enjoying kinder (though he did need a second year as he wasn't emotionally or socially ready for school). I do get frustrated with him as I feel that people don't get to see the real person my DS is, I know a boy who is bright, funny and sweet, who is creative and enjoys playing... but all I feel others see is a moody boy, a wild boy, I guess a "naughty" boy as well though I don't really like that word.

I know thats not the real person he is, that's just him when people come round or if we go to others houses. If it's me and my DD or my DH he's generally well behaved (unless the usual exceptions like tired or just bickering with his sister and vice versa).

Sometimes it's not even wild behaviour- sometimes he won't answer people when people ask him questions like "how are you?" Or "what have you done at kinder this week". He doesn't speak to them, won't engage, but he will start jumping around making squawking noises for example. On occasions I see some real socia awkwardness, though this may just be his personality.

Some examples of his behaviour today when MIL and SIL visited:

Climbing on the sofa from one end to the other, and on the back of the sofa, jumping off, jumping on the sofa )like you would a bed) screaming (making loud scream noises but not crying), crying about not being allowed on tablet, laying on the sofa kicking legs to shake the sofa. This is just a feel for what he was like. It slowly got worse the longer they stayed and by the time they went I had a headache.

Why do you think my DS struggles to handle these situations. Is it just excitement? Or something like insecurity? He cried and asked repeatedly for a good 45 mins if he could play on my SILs tablet though he knows this isn't really allowed. He associates seeing his aunties with time on games etc which I don't think is healthy.

But what I am most interested in is his behaviour and why it changes. Is it because I am busy or it's just energy or excitement? What is his behaviour telling me? Can anyone help? He can also demonstrate the same behaviour when I am on FaceTime unless he's distracted by a film.

Many thanks!

[WS12]

I should add he is 5 years 3 months old.