ADHD--earliest diagnosis in the UK, benefits of one-to-one tutoring; schools

[sofia2014]

Hello,
I have a son, who is nearly 3 years old and who I have suspected has ADHD since he was only a few months oldconstantly fidgety, wants to be constantly engaged by me and my husband, can't sit still. Now that he is nearly 3, he can rarely focus on watching TV. I know he is different no matter how often I hear that "he will outgrow this phase". As a result we are constantly entertaining him which is draining and emotionally exhausting. I am getting a sense from talking to his nursery carers that he is more on the active side compared to other children. While others of his age are outgrowing their hyper active toddler phase, he is falling behind in things that involve sitting in a circle and focusing on activitieslearning numbers, colors, etc. He is very bright otherwise and his language development is good. Having read the other ADHD posts I get a sense that diagnosis often comes very late as parents are just being fobbed off by the doctors until things start going seriously wrong at school.

So, my questions are, is it worth getting an early diagnosis? If so, how does one get a diagnosis at 3-4 years?
My second question is, is it worth seeing a private child specialist that does one on one sessions? I came across a very impressive private specialist in our area, who would be willing to work with my son, but the fees are very high --£85 per hour. My hope though is that an experienced professional would be able to identify any issues early on and refer us to specialists. Does anyone have experience with similar issues?
Finally, schools: my son is registered to sit his assessment at a good local private school. Are private schools better at providing help with ADHD issues? Or do they instantly spot ADHD at assessment and reject the child a place? Many thanks for any advice!

maybe try posting in the special needs boards, as there are a lot of parents with much young children there.

ok, will do, many thanks for suggesting it (if I figure out how to do it--am new to the site)!

The range of activity amongst little boys can vary widely with some nbot settling down till they are closer to 5-6. My son may be have been amongst the youngest in the country to be diaognosed with ADHD [he was 18 months old]. His Aspergers was picked up by 2 1/4 by tier 3 CAHMS. He was formally assessed by a Child Psych, a Consultant Child Psych, Principal Speech Therapist, two peaditricans and an OT before he was formally diaognosed. He was assessed at a tier 3 CAHMS specilsit unit, the CDC, his nursary and home. IF you have a young toddler with severe ADHD no one who comes into contact with them is left in any doubt they have it. Ben slept less than 4 hours in 24, climbed onto roofs, broke child locks and had 'squirrals'. He was well known to any professional who spent more than 5 minutes with him. I kept a diary of the things that made me think 'hmm' and my GP used that to refer him to the CDC by 14 months as Ben undid his office chair. An early diaognosis can help a severely affected child to access Portage, VTS and similar schemes. It also means an Ed Psych can begin to access for extra educatonal needs before they hit school. My best advice is keep a diary, see your GP and ask for a ref to CAHMS or your local child development centre. Its normally quicker to go via child development than CAHMS. If CAHMS is needed they will make an urgent tertiary referral so you get seen a bit quicker. There are an awful lot of folk out there who are willing to cash in on Dyslexia/ADHD and similar. Positive Parenting offer parenting courses for parents whose kids have ADHD and they are opften free so contact them and ask if anyone is offering a course were you live. Unless you are able to pay an awful lot of money for extra 1:1 in private schooling your honestly better off looking at a Statement of Educational Needs [IPSEA Charity is very helpful on these] This means the educational authority will find the funding for 1:1, any other professionals needed such as speech therapists, occupational therapists and similar. In a private setting you would need to be able to pay extra for all of these. If you go via the NHS then the NHS will fund the extra medical speacalists needed. The best approach I found is the holistic one which means parents working with proffesionals and teachers and everyone singing from the same song sheet. The hypseractive side can settle down to fidgetting and fiddling as kids with ADHD get older, some have a firey adolescence but if you managed to handle the toddler stage you have a better chance to steering them through to adulthood without getting into too many scrapes. If I might be able to signpost you to support just ask.